Fun & Games at Grimmauld Place
by Gemini-Victoria
Summary: Sirius is bored. Tonks is sick of being woken up at all hour by Sirius playing darts. what are they going to do? A secret prank off of course! involving slugs,shirt-stealing and more, you can just picture the chaos read and review! NT/RL
1. Sirius is Bored

A/N: hello and i hope you enjoy this story!! this just a funny, sweet story i wrote while back. however i just want to let you all know that starting next week i am writing a new series and will be alternating chapters so one week this and the next week my other story. Ok? sorry if you are mad with me. and please people, read and review!!! thanks for your understanding.

Tonks woke with a start. Something funny was going on, she could tell, she did have Auror training after all.

First of all, it was half past six in the morning, (someone was going to pay for waking her an hour before her alarm went off), secondly it was a Tuesday, the only person in the house at this time should be Sirius, the others being out on Order business and thirdly, there was a very, very odd and somewhat suspicious knocking sound coming from somewhere out in the hallway.

She lay with her eyes scrunched up, concentrating hard on the sound, trying to focus in on it and ignore the part of her brain that was angrily yelling at her that it was too bloody early to be worrying about these kinds of things.

After a few seconds of this concentration, the incessant knocking sound was broken by a sudden loud bang and then . . . a cheer? What in the name of Merlin's many multicolored beards was going on?

The young, pink haired, heart faced Auror struggled out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a crumpled t-shirt that had been dropped in a heap on the floor at some point during her stay at Grimmauld place. She snatched up her wand from the bedside table, clumsily managing to knock the old lamp over onto the floor where it shattered into a number of tiny pieces and created a further noise which added to the headache she could feel coming on.

_So much for the element of surprise_, she thought, cursing under her breath as she tapped the lamp with her wand and the pieces flew back into place, sticking seamlessly together. Tonks had gotten very good at repairing spells funnily enough.

With the lamp back in place, a pair of purple slippers shaped like hippogriffs on her feet and her wand outstretched, she approached the door and opened it very slowly, peering out into the hallway.

"Duck!"

Tonks tripped over the door frame in her surprise, stubbing her toe nicely in the process and fell to the floor. Just in time too it seemed, as she looked up a dart sailed over her head and stuck into a board fixed to the wall down the other end of the corridor.

"Sirius Black!" she demanded furiously as she sat on the floor rubbing her hurt toe and trying to ignore the headache which had further increased. "What in the hell do you think you're doing? It's half six in the morning!"

"Amusing myself dear cousin," Sirius replied with his trademark grin plastered to his face. "Why did I wake you?"

Tonks pulled a face and his grin grew further as he waved his wand lazily and the dart unstuck itself from the board (which Tonks could now see had a picture of Snape's face stuck firmly over the bull's-eye in the centre) and flew back to him, landing in his outstretched hand.

"You appear to have hurt your toe Nymphadora," he said with a chuckle and made to throw the dart again.

Tonks put a stop to his fun however and yelled "Accio dart" as loud as she could, and with enough force that she was forced to duck once more as it sailed out of Sirius' hand and imbedded itself in the doorframe above her head.

"Now now Nympahdora -"

"Use my first name again and I'll charm this dart to permanently chase you around the house" she said through gritted teeth and watched the irritating grin on her cousin's face grow further.

"Tonks then, you don't really want to be such a spoilsport now do you?"

Tonks pulled a face that clearly said she couldn't care less and stood upright, hopping slightly and clutching at the doorframe to remain upright.

"Sirius, why have you got a dart board, in fact, where did you get it from?"

"Mundungus, err, found it," Sirius replied

Tonks made a mental note to have serious words with Mundungus.

"Look, I know you're bored -" Tonks began before Sirius interrupted her.

"-Bored, bored! I'm stuck in this flaming house, this appalling, run down, evil, stinking excuse for a house day and night! You think I might be bored! Well done Tonks, what an observation, how fantastic, how did you ever -"

She cut him off with an irritable wave of her hand and hopped across the landing towards the stairs. Sirius who knew his cousin and her clumsy ways on too well could sense the danger a mile off and stopped his tirade in time to sprint to her side and suggest nervously that he help her down the stairs.

Tonks glared at him.

"I can manage."

"Are you sure, because I'm not really angry at you, I mean, you know how it is, but any way, I wouldn't want you to fall or anything."

"I said, I can manage, I'm an Auror if you hadn't forgotten."

"And we're all very proud of you," Sirius replied patronisingly. "But seriously Tonks, I know what you're like and I wouldn't want -"

He gave in as he watched her begin her slow jerky descent down the winding stair case, moving one step at a time, hopping so that she looked like a hinkypunk. Sirius followed behind her, wand drawn, ready to yell a charm to stop her from falling if she showed signs of starting slip. To his surprise, (and Tonks' though she wouldn't admit it), she reached the bottom of the stairs with out incident and began making her way to the kitchen, giving the trolls leg umbrella stand a very wide berth.

Sirius hurried ahead and held the door open for her, daring to bow which made her smile slightly and he hoped her bad mood might be slightly assuaged.

She crossed the kitchen floor, still hopping, and dropped heavily into one of the high backed wooden chairs that surrounded the old oak table. Sirius headed to the sink, staring at the dirty plates stacked up inside some murky water with an expression of mingled fear and disgust. He knew full well what Molly would say if she saw them, or Remus for that matter.

"So, what about breakfast then?" Tonks said, properly smiling now that she had gotten over her hurt toe and was successfully ignoring the headache.

"What about it?" Sirius replied, still eyeing the dishes as if he expected them to rise up in formation and attack him.

Tonks raised her eyebrows at him.

"Well I am currently an invalid thanks to you."

She motioned to her toe that had swollen slightly.

"Oh well Remus will be along in half an hour or so, you can get him to kiss it better then can't you."

Sirius ducked instinctively without turning around and heard the slimy wet slap of the dirty dishcloth hit the wall at the height his head had been moments before. He turned around to see Tonks once more glaring at him.

"If you know what's good for you Sirius, you will never -"

"- oh come off it cousin," Sirius teased, giving up on the dishes entirely and instead setting about making tea and toast for the both of them. "I've been around Remus long enough to know when he fancies someone and you and I are related, I can read you like a book."

"Oh yeah, what am I thinking right now then?" Tonks asked with a worryingly dangerous glint in her eyes.

"How much you would like to squash my head into the toaster," Sirius replied and she laughed reassuringly.

"Might be more fun than sitting around here all day though," he added in a somewhat dejected tone.

The toast popped up a moment later and he caught the pieces deftly, slapping them down onto a couple of plates and layering on butter and jam generously.

"There's got to be something for you to do Sirius," Tonks managed to get out through a mouthful of toast. "I mean, you're in this big old house, surely there's stuff to explore."

"Nothing it's worth my life to touch," he replied and Tonks couldn't help but agree. Considering their foray into the attic that one time, she decided she never wanted to sneak around the Black house in the dark again. Certainly not with all the weird things on the loose up there anyway.

Tonks sat silently as she ate her breakfast, considering Sirius's words. She did feel bad for him, cooped up in the house the whole time, and Remus was away often and not hugely good company when he was around. As Sirius had put it to her one day, all the marauder seemed to have gone out of him. Tonks had a sneaking suspicion that Harry might be taking his place in Sirius's mind. What Sirius needed really was to get out of the house, to live again, to have some fun . . .

Just as Tonks was about to suggest an idea, the kitchen door opened and a weary looking Remus Lupin strode in and seated himself at the table with a wan smile to the two of them. Sirius who was over at the side, contemplating the dishes once more, brought the tired man a cup of coffee.

"Thank you," Remus said as it was set down in front of him. "Is not it a little early for the two of you to be up though?"

"Oh Sirius here thought it was the best idea in the whole world to play darts in the corridor at half six," Tonks said, shooting Sirius daggers as she finished her sentence.

Remus smiled slightly and shook his head but remained silent, sipping away at his coffee and yawning widely.

"So how was watch duty?" Sirius asked, moving slightly to block Remus' view of the pile up in the sink.

"Oh, same as always, nothing much to report," Remus replied taking another mouthful of the hot coffee. He glanced up at Sirius and saw the sheepish grin on his face and began trying to peer around the other man who shifted his position slightly.

"Sirius, what is behind you?"

"Nothing nothing. So are you around the rest of the day?" Sirius replied, and Tonks laughed at his feeble attempt to divert Remus' attention.

"No, I have to go into Hogsmeade, we're running out of ingredients in the fist aid kit here, but don't change the subject. What is behind you Sirius?"

Sirius skipped sideways again as Lupin leaned back in his chair in amusement, attempting to look around his friend. Tonks fell about laughing and Remus glanced over at her awkwardly, wondering if she had seen the brief smile that had filled up his face at the sound. No, she was too busy staring at her cousin and Remus returned his attention to Sirius who appeared to be doing some sort of jig on the kitchen tiles as he attempted to block Remus' line of vision.

"Sirius, you're being ridiculous, it can't be that bad, whatever it is!"

Sirius finally gave up as Remus made to rise from his seat, figuring he didn't want a duel this early in the morning.

"Sirius!" Remus groaned, shaking his head as his eyes fell upon the cluttered sink. The bubbles in the water were bursting with a strange gloopy sound and did not smell good either.

"That is appalling!" Remus said in disgust.

"It wasn't just me!" Sirius said, pointing an accusing finger at Tonks who held up her hands in mock self defence.

"How long have they been sat there?"

"How long has it been since you turned into an old woman, Remus? Fussing over the dishes, you'll be checking whether I've picked up my dirty washing next," Sirius replied defensively and Tonks turned slightly red as she thought of the piles of clothes on her bedroom floor.

"That's no excuse for this, this, monstrosity!" Remus said. "Are you breeding things in there Sirius, because something might have died, or was that just last weeks chilli still on the plates?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and shrugged.

"Come on Remus, what happened to Mooney? You know, the one who used to sneak out at night with us and play pranks?"

"He grew up Sirius, and so should you. I'm off for a shower before I leave."

Lupin washed up his coffee cup and placed it back in the cupboard with a pointed look at Sirius who grinned at him.

"When I come back later, I want that all gone," Remus said with a nod towards the slowly bubbling sink. Fumes were beginning to rise from the swampy surface now.

"See ya Remus," Tonks said as he headed out the door.

"Goodbye Nymphadora, have a nice day," Remus replied with a small smile as he went.

Sirius made a gagging motion and even Tonks cringed at the use of her first name.

"Merlin he is so boring now," Sirius said, scraping his chair back, rolling up his sleeves and sidling up to the sink warily for the third time.

"No, you just drive him up the wall, he's a lot of fun when I'm with him," Tonks replied.

"Yeah, well he would be wouldn't he."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Tonks asked threateningly and Sirius smiled sweetly at her.

"Nothing at all dear cousin," he replied. "But that doesn't change the fact that Remus the marauder has turned into Remus the housewife."

"Well," Tonks said, "perhaps you both just need to have some fun. I've been thinking -"

"- oh yes?!" Sirius said sounding excited and latching onto anything that would get him out of having to tackle the sink.

Tonks raised her eyebrows in a particularly convincing impression of Remus, shortening her pink spiky hair to his length and turning it mousy brown.

"You can talk whilst you clean, Sirius" she said in a good imitation of Lupin's voice and Sirius gave her a dejected smile and turned back to the task ahead of him.

"What we need is, some sort of tournament," Tonks said, "some ongoing thing that takes up our spare time, something like -"

"- the Grimmauld place games!" Sirius said excitedly and not looking at what he was doing, stuck his hand into a particular grimy bowl. His fingers connected with something that felt like mud, and then squirmed underneath his hands. He jerked his arm back with a yell and peered at the surface of the water once more.

"I think Remus might be right you know," he said to Tonks who was looking confused. "There's definitely something living in here."


	2. foundations are laid

Tonks fell about laughing as Sirius glanced down in disgust at his hand. Some grey, mushy substance was oozing between his fingers and dripping onto the floor with a wet splat.

"Oh good god, what is that!" he yelled, gripping his slimed hand with the other and holding it out in front of him as if it were infected.

Tonks had her head buried in her hands and was shaking with the force of her laughter.

"It's not funny!" Sirius yelled, watching as the grey ooze that had puddled on the floor underneath him began to spread. "I'm, I'm, DISEASED!"

"Sirius, Sirius . . ." Tonks gave up as a fresh fit of laughter gripped her.

Sirius ran to the side again and stuck his hand under the tap water, watching as the ooze was washed off into the still full sink. The fresh water appeared to be making no difference at all to the swamp that had grown up inside the bowl and he watched the surface very, very carefully, waiting for something to rise up and grab him.

"What do you think it is?" Tonks asked, coming to stand beside her cousin now that she had regained control of herself.

"Some sort of ooze, monster, thing! I don't know!" Sirius replied, now scrubbing at his hand with soap.

Tonks drew her wand and began poking experimentally through the washing up, searching. Sirius watched carefully and occasionally glanced at his hand with a worried expression.

"There might be . . . hang on a second, I think I've got it cornered," Tonks said, biting her lip in concentration as her wand darted back and forth in amongst the plates and dishes, following whatever it was that had slimed Sirius.

"Ahh ha! Stupefy!" she roared.

There was a sudden flash from under the grimy surface of the water, a number of plates cracked and the two of them huddled over the sink were splashed with the putrid water.

Coughing and spluttering, Tonks flicked her wand, muttering "Wingardium leviosa" and something rose up out of the mess and hung in the air in front of them.

"I am going to, KILL, Fred and George!" Sirius growled.

Suspended and slowly revolving in front of the two of them was a very fat, very slimy, very angry, sewage slug.

"A slug, a slug!" Sirius raged.

"Why would Fred and George have them?" Tonks asked, watching as the slug revolved slowly through the air, it's slimy mouth snapping away at nothing.

"Puking pastils," Sirius replied. "Sewage slug's slime is very good for, erm, making you throw up."

Tonks shook her head and flicked her wand, sending the slug flying into the bin where it landed with a clang before the lid shut on top of it.

"They mentioned that some had escaped," Sirius continued as he began searching through the water with his own wand for more slugs.

"So, those things are on the loose in the house?" Tonks said.

"Yep. Gotcha!"

Sirius triumphantly sent another of the fat slugs spinning across the room and into the bin with a satisfying splat.

He grimaced in concentration as he chased another one around under the water with his wand, searching in amongst the dirty dishes (and breaking a considerable number in the process).

"Come on, give me a hand!" he said and Tonks joined him on the hunt.

The two of them spent the best part of two hours searching through the kitchen for the slugs, and in the process the dishes that hadn't been shattered were cleaned. They kept a running tally of how many of the slugs had been caught and at the end of the hunt, stood over the bin that was full of ooze, staring down at the angry slugs.

"Twenty," Sirius said in disbelief. "They must have been breeding."

"Which means there are still more somewhere around, most likely," Tonks replied, wiping a dark stain from her forehead with her sleeve.

"I believe I caught more than you cousin," she added with a grin and Sirius shrugged.

"Alright, ten points to you then."

"Sorry?"

Sirius grinned and motioned to her to take a seat at the table, which she did. It was far too early, she decided, for such strenuous activity as chasing slugs around. Sirius joined her a few minutes later, two cold drinks in hand and a strange twinkle in his eyes.

"So, as I was going to say before we were so rudely interrupted," Sirius said with a grin. "What we need, is the Grimmauld place games! First points to you for catching more slugs!"

Tonks finished off her drink quickly and held up her hands to motion for him to slow down.

"Hang on a minute mister, we can't have a tournament with only two of us! We need more people, and proper tasks and -"

"-someone to keep score!" Sirius added, excitable as ever.

"Sure, someone to keep score and considering Remus probably won't play, and Molly definitely won't approve, it had better be Remus doing it."

"He'll moan," Sirius replied bluntly.

Tonks gave a shrug.

"Well you'll cheat, so I suppose I'll do it."

Sirius opened his mouth to protest, then decided that she was probably correct any way and changed tack.

"So, who else do we want?"

Tonks looked thoughtful for a moment, running through the names of the various younger Order members whom she thought more likely to agree with the idea.

"Well, what about Bill?" she asked.

"Sure. Fleur might not be too happy though," Sirius added and Tonks grinned.

"'Dung would play for sure," he continued.

"Alright, I can't think of anyone else for the moment, but we can always add others into the game later on."

Tonks summoned over a roll of parchment from the side, along with a quill and began drawing up a table, headed with the words, "Grimmauld place games score sheet," in large writing at the top.

"So, add ten points in your column already," Sirius said looking down at the sheet.

"Hmm, seems a little unfair, I mean the others didn't even have a chance, in fact we haven't spoken to them yet. We'll hold off on adding those points and say, oh, two points per slug caught from now on? Agreed?"

"Sounds fair," Sirius replied.

The two of them finished drawing up the tables and decided upon some preliminary rules for the games before lunch, agreeing to talk to Bill and Mundungus, (who would be around for an Order meeting later that day), before they started coming up with any tasks.

"It's got to be like a game of dares, in a way," Tonks said as they sat at the table eating sandwiches.

"Sure, so the tasks have to be hard, or gross," Sirius said with a slight grimace at the memory of the oozing, gooey . . . he made himself stop thinking as he looked down at his sandwich and fought the urge to be sick.

"But not too dangerous, considering we've still got Order work to do," Tonks added.

"Some of you have anyway," Sirius replied somewhat sullenly and Tonks forced the conversation back to the games before he could get moody.

"What about the others, do we tell them what's going on?" she asked.

Sirius got a sudden look in his eyes that Tonks found very suspicious, as well as a little unnerving.

"I think it would be more fun if we kept them in the dark," he said. "That way, we can use them in some of the challenges."

Tonks, feeling very nervous about this new idea, was about to interrupt him when she heard the front door open and Mrs Black's screeches start up, accompanied by some colourful swearing.

_"Filthy, half-breed, muggle loving creatures! Werewolves in my house, furry demons, out, out, out, I say!"_

"Remus is back," Sirius announced in a blank voice as the screams stopped suddenly.

The kitchen door opened and Remus Lupin, looking extremely irritable, strode in, arms full with shopping bags which were unceremoniously dumped onto the table before he flopped down in a chair, shooting a glance at Sirius.

"Cleaned the sink up yet?" he asked.

"Yes _mother,_ I did," Sirius replied with a withering look at his friend.

"With my help!" Tonks protested and Remus gave her a slight smile as he glanced over at the sink.

"Well . . ." Remus paused and looked uncomfortable for a moment. "I'm impressed. Well done."

Tonks and Sirius glanced over at each other in surprise.

"Sorry, I know I've not been much fun, I . . . well you know, all this work, the new werewolf laws, it's a bit . . ." he trailed off and rubbed the back of his neck self consciously.

"No worries mate," Sirius said, standing up and slapping his friend on the back as he headed over to the now clean sink and deposited his plate in the water, scrubbing it as an after thought.

"What's that then? Shopping list?" Remus asked with interest as he caught sight of the parchment in front of Tonks on the table. She hastily rolled it up and pushed it into her bag which was hanging over the back of the chair.

"Yeah, shopping list. Really boring, just some stuff for, err, the meal tomorrow . . ."

"Oh?" Remus looked surprised, "Are you cooking?"

Sirius barked a laugh as he sat down.

"I hope not!"

Tonks considered protesting but figured she would end up backing herself into a corner and let it go.

"No, just doing Molly a favour, that's all," she said and sighed with relief as Remus nodded.

"I see. Well, if you'll both excuse me, I need some sleep before the others arrive for the meeting."

Remus left the kitchen in somewhat better than he had entered it and Tonks was beginning to feel a little guilty for not telling him what was going on.

"Sirius?"

"Hmm?"

Sirius looked up over the top of the magazine he was flipping idly through, a moving picture of the Chudley Cannons on the front.

"Do you think we should have perhaps said something to him?"

Sirius grinned evilly and shook his head.

"I think it's more fun this way," Sirius said. "Not going soft on me are you cousin?"

"Of course not!" Tonks protested, still feeling a little unsure. "I just think that -"

She was cut off however by a loud yell and a sudden bang from upstairs. The two of them leapt from their seats and ran through the door to the foot of the stairs. Sirius was halfway up them when they heard Remus' voice yelling.

"Slug, there's a bloody great slug in my bed!"  
Tonks fell about laughing again, clutching at the banisters for support as Sirius turned around to grin at her.

"Is that two points for Remus then?" he asked innocently.

The order meeting that afternoon was a subdued affair despite so many members being present. Remus, who was convinced despite their protests to the contrary, that Sirius and Tonks had put the slug in his bed, had not spoken to either of them and kept yawning widely even when it was his turn to stand up and speak. Tonks was still feeling bad, but the look on Remus' face when he had emerged half dressed from his bedroom, slug suspended in the air in front of him, kept threatening to give her the giggles. Sirius seemed to think the incident was some kind of karmic payback for Remus' earlier ill spirits and continued to tell Tonks so throughout Snape's long and drawling speech on potion safety.

Once the meeting was over, Tonks and Sirius managed to corner Mundungus, (who jumped when Sirius called his name and stuffed something inside his jacket pocket,) and Bill who was forced to disentangle himself from Fleur, who were both quickly filled in on the plan.

"Yeah, err alright then, I'll do it," Mundungus said awkwardly as Sirius finished talking. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Remus leaving the room with a suspicious glance in their direction and fought the urge to wave at him.

"Yeah, count me in!" Bill replied eagerly and Tonks grinned.

"Great. Well, preliminary rules as it stands are thus; all the tasks have to take place inside number 12 Grimmauld place, due to Sirius' predicament. Next, nothing that involves serious bodily harm, we all have jobs to do."

There was a round of grateful nods to this statement.

"Tasks should be funny, not painful, preferably and try not to involve too much damage to other people or property," Mundungus shifted from foot to foot and Tonks figured this last rule was probably going to get broken very quickly.

"Who comes up with task then?" Bill asked, quickly covering his fang earring as his mother walked past and smiled at him.

Sirius grinned at him and replied, "Well, we figured we should all write tasks for each other, if they're specific to each person then that makes them more fun!"

Tonks still wasn't sure about this last point, in fact she wasn't sure about a good many of the things Sirius said but she didn't want to be called chicken in front of the others and went along with the idea, for now at least, She would just have to wait and see what the others came up with for her.

"Obviously you can decline harder tasks, but the harder tasks will get you more points, so refuse too many and you'll be out of the running." Sirius finished.

"So, what do we win then?" Mundungus asked.

Sirius shrugged. "Bragging rights? I dunno, we'll come up with something. But everyone think over tasks tonight and we'll have another chat tomorrow after the morning meeting. Dumbledore's going to be around though, so keep things quiet, alright? Not a word to the others." He finished with a wink and they dispersed quickly, yelling their goodbyes across the room.

Sirius accompanied Tonks up the stairs as they headed for their rooms, it had been a very long meeting and like Remus, they were both in needs of sleep.

"Watch out for slugs," Sirius said as Tonks entered her room. "And have a good think I want lots of lovely ideas for 'Dung to get back at him for those useless broomsticks he sold me!"

With that, the last of the Blacks disappeared into his room, the Snape centred dart board tucked under one arm and a grin on his face.


	3. The Tasks

A/N: hello Merry Christmas or whatever you celebrate and happy new year here is the next chapter enjoy!!! oh, and thanx to my wonderful Beta sockpuppet82!!!!!!!!!!!

Tonks looked down at the piece of parchment spread out on the bed in front of her and grinned.

It was half past seven in the morning and, after waking up early with the kind of excitement that a child feels on the morning of their birthday, she had begun to write.

Ideas flashed through her mind, each one becoming more and more ridiculous as she sought to outdo the terrible tasks that she knew Sirius and the others would come up with for her. And now, it was complete.

She read through them all once more to make sure that they really were within the rules they had discussed, (to an extent, at least) and that the points matched up.

Tonks for Sirius. _  
1. Attempt to out-insult the portrait in the hall, after an Order meeting, as everyone is leaving. (+20)  
2. Convince Molly that you're really attracted to Bill. (+30)  
3. Give Snape a kiss in dog form. (+30)  
4. Redecorate one of the other Order members bedroom's whilst they're on watch duty. (+10)  
5. Tell Snape you admire him greatly and want a signed picture, hand him the dart board. (10+)_

Tonks for Mundungus.  
_1. Spend one hour alone in the attic. (+20)  
2. Dress up as a Dementor and attack Kingsley. (+30)  
3. Set off some off some of the no-fire fireworks at night. (+10)  
4. Tell Kingsley you're too scared to sleep and need him to check for monsters under the bed. (+20)  
5. Set all of Moody's sneak-o-scopes to go off in the middle of the night. (20)_

Tonks for Bill.  
_1. Get a tattoo, show Molly "accidentally" during an Order meeting. (+20)  
2. Stick your arm in the hole in the wall in the basement, with the "thing" living in it; keep it there for two minutes. (+20)  
3. Dump a bowl of porridge over your head at the breakfast table one morning. (+10)  
4. Wash Kreacher's feet for him. (+30)  
5. Write a love letter for Fleur, that "accidentally" ends up going to Kingsley. (+20)_

She was very proud of some of them, particularly the ones for Sirius, and couldn't wait to see them in action, despite the cold dread that was beginning to grip her stomach as she wondered what exactly the others might have in store for her.

As she mused on this, there was a tap at the door and a sleepy voice called out.

"Nymphadora, breakfast is ready."

"It's Tonks, Remus, as you very well know!"

She heard him chuckle outside the door and then muffled footsteps on the landing. Once he had headed downstairs, she rolled up the parchment and got dressed quickly, slipping the tasks into her trouser pocket before leaving the room.

Remus was busy reading the daily prophet, his back to her, when she entered the room. Sirius looked up as she took a seat at the table and grinned, shuffling his seat over so they could speak.

"So, had a think?" he asked, as Mundungus and Bill joined the two of them at the table.

Tonks nodded and grinned.

"Yeah, you?"

Sirius fished a dog eared piece of parchment from his pocket and the others followed suit.

"Eat your breakfast quickly, we need to head into the library so we won't be overheard," Sirius said, glancing up at the entirely uninterested Remus and Molly who was too busy fussing with Arthur's robes to notice the four conspirators.

Tonks wolfed down some scrambled eggs and then followed them out of the room as Arthur was leaving for work. Remus didn't even look up from his paper.

"Alright, let's see what you've got," said Sirius once they had entered the room and pulled the comfy chairs close together.

Tonks unfurled the parchment and laid it out upon the table for the others to see.

"Tonks!" Sirius yelled as he looked at his list. "You, evil, cruel, heartless . . . _kiss_ _Snape_!?"

He pointed a finger in disgust at the third task as Mundungus burst out laughing.

"I don't know what you're laughing about mate, you won't survive an hour in the attic," Sirius said and Mundungus shut up immediately.

Sirius grimaced at the tasks but eventually stuck out a hand for Tonks to shake.

"Well done," he conceded, "there's definitely a lot of Marauder in you."

Tonks grinned and waited for him to unfurl the dog eared parchment upon which he had written the tasks for them.

"Sirius!" she yelled as she stared at her tasks, "you can't do that!"

Sirius for Tonks. _  
1. Steal Lupin's favourite shirt. (+10)  
2. Try to get Remus to say the phrase "I think pink hair is very sexy" without telling him to say it. (+30)  
3. Curse the shower to turn on when you say the word "handsome," convince Remus the shower is broken, get him to fix it for you, make sure he gets wet. (+20)  
4. Claim you are going out on a date for undercover work for the Order, have Remus help you pick an outfit. (+10)  
5. When Remus is reading in the library, sit on his lap and ask him to tell you a story. (+30)_

Sirius for Mundungus.  
_1. Eat a sewage slug. (+30)  
2. Get Moody to turn you into a ferret without telling him to. (+20)  
3. Steal Moody's crazy eye. (+30)  
4. Claim to be a big fan of Dolores Umbridge and her werewolf policies in front of Remus. (+10)  
5. Ask Snape if you can wash his greasy hair. When he refuses, water bomb him. (+10)_

Sirius for Bill.  
_1. Turn your hair blue and cut to a mullet, tell Molly its Gringotts new regulation hair cut. (+10)  
2. Drink a glass of the disgusting sink water. (+20)  
3. Slip Emmeline Vance a love potion - then get running. (+30)  
4. Feed Snape some laughter potion. (+20)  
5. Tell Fleur you really love French food and want to try frogs legs, eat at least three of them. (+20)  
_  
Sirius grinned and slapped Bill on the back -- he was looking particularly scared about task three.

"It's no worse than what you set me," he said.

"All of mine involve Remus! He's not even in the game."

"That's sort of the point," Sirius replied and Tonks opened her mouth furiously, ready to curse Sirius into oblivion. She was cut off however, by a strange whimpering coming from Mundungus.

"Oh no, oh no, oh no, not Moody, come on Sirius, play fair, he's going to kill me!"

"Yeah, shame that," Sirius said in a tone that made it all too clear what he really thought.

Not wishing to delay the agony any further, Bill and Mundungus laid their tasks out on the table for the others to see as well.

Mundungus for Sirius.  
_1. Eat Molly's evening meal then take five of Fred and George's puking pastels. Claim it was her food. (+20)  
2. Slip five people, in the Order, Canary Creams. (+10)  
3. Wander into Moody's bedroom when he's asleep and claim you got lost on the way to the bathroom. (+20)  
4. Replace Dumbledore's copy of the Daily Prophet with 'Which Witch Weekly.' (+30)  
5. Convince Dedalus Diggle that someone in the Order really fancies him. (+20)_

Mundungus for Tonks.  
_1. Take on the Grindylow in the toilet on the second floor. (+10)  
2. Charm all the carpets to fly the moment someone steps on them. (+10)  
3. Grow a moustache for the day. (+30)  
4. Tell Snape you had a crush on him when you were younger. (+30)  
5. Offer to paint a picture of Moody, paint his face on top of a woman's body, hang the painting in the hallway. (+20)_

Mundungus for Bill. _  
1. Ride Buckbeak around the house three times without falling off. (+20)  
2. Tell Kingsley he's going bald and suggest some of Fred and George's hair growth potion. Slap it on anyway if he refuses. (+20)  
3. Put wand polish in Molly's makeup. (+10)  
4. Ask Moody if he'll give you dancing lessons to try with Fleur. (+30)  
5. Charm Arthur's razor to take off all his hair. (+20) _

Tonks looked in outrage at task four -- a crush on _Snape_? -- and Sirius grinned, muttering something about "payback," before Bill laid out his tasks.

Bill for Sirius. _  
1. By all legal means possible, attempt to get Mad Eye to explain how he got the wooden leg. (+20)  
2. Put on Dumbledore's purple robes and wear them to an Order meeting, declaring, "I am the fairest of them all." (+30)  
3. Eat all of Remus' chocolates, in one go, in front of him. Don't puke. (+10)  
4. Let the Doxy's in the crate in Fred and George's room loose in Hestia Jones' room. (+20)  
5. Convince the rest of the Order you have fleas. (+20)_

Bill for Tonks._  
1. Down seven shots of firewhiskey in a row. (+20)  
2. Attempt to engage Remus in a serious conversation about werewolf rights, having done task number one. (+20)  
3. Put mistletoe up everywhere in the house and claim you're getting some practice in for Christmas, catch at least three Order members under it. (+30)  
4. Curse Dumbledore's beard to tie into knots the next time he calls you by your first name. (+10)  
5. Spend a day pretending to have forgotten everything since you joined the Order. (+20) _

Bill for Mundungus.  
_1. Wear one of Tonks' skirts and tops to an Order meeting, claiming it's for undercover work. (+30)  
2. Seranade Snape as he enters the house. (+20)  
3. Dye all Snape's robes pink. (+10)  
4. Write a letter to the Daily Prophet declaring your love for McGonagall. (+30)  
5. Swap the shampoo in the main bathroom for Weasley's rainbow hair dye. (+10)_

Mundungus was groaning again and Tonks wasn't looking that impressed with the thought of loaning him some of her clothes, but thought that it was probably worth it anyway.

"Well, congratulations everyone, you came up with some suitably horrible tasks," Sirius said when they had finished arguing over the safety of a number of them.

"There are a total of 300 points available for each person, plus, I came up with a number of group tasks, they are as follows. Catch sewage slugs, two points per slug. Pick a fight with another Order member without them realising, that's worth twenty points with a bonus thirty points if you win the duel. Hit as many of the paintings in the house with a Quaffle as possible, whilst riding a bucking broom, within two minutes. Ten points per portrait nailed, twenty if you get Mother in the hallway.

"And," Sirius paused and glanced around at all of them, "Drink a vial of Veritaserum each before an Order meal, extra fifty points."

They all nodded agreement, running through in their minds various ways they might be able to get around the final task Sirius had set. Tonks had heard that there was a way of weakening Veritaserum by mixing it with Polyjuice Potion ... or did that just make it stronger?

"Right then, remember, when you attempt a task, we have to be around to make sure you do it correctly, no cheating!" Tonks said.

They nodded once more and Tonks made duplicates of all the tasks so each member had their own copy and was aware of exactly what challenges lay ahead for them.

"Let the games begin!" Sirius said with a grin.


	4. Round One

A/N: so sorry for the long wait! Hope you enjoy it! And thanx as always to my beta Sockpuppet82!

Oh and a WARNING: do NOT under any circumstances eat before reading this chapter!

"I hate you, Sirius. I hate you, I hate you, I seriously, one hundred percent hate you, more than any other person on this good green earth."

Sirius was crying with laughter, clutching his sides desperately, feeling like he was going to have a heart attack if he didn't stop laughing soon. Bill was leaning heavily on him, roaring with laughter and Tonks had been reduced to a puddle of giggles on the floor where she sat, now staring up at Mundungus Fletcher.

"You're bloody evil, Sirius, you know that? Evil! Foul! Azkaban, that's what did it. Turned you heartless and-"

"Come on, 'Dung, it's been ten minutes now, it won't eat itself," Sirius managed to choke out through his laughing fit. This set Tonks off further, who felt like her sides were going to split.

Mundungus held the sewage slug he had found under the stairs up to the light, studying it some more. It writhed around in his grasp and he turned green.

"Can I Stun it, or kill it or something first? Only I don't want it to … _wriggle_."

"If you . . . if you . . . have . . . to! Ha, ha, ha!"

Sirius attempted to straighten up and gave Mundungus a consoling pat on the shoulder. 'Dung tapped the slug with his wand, muttering something under his breath that contained a number of swear words, as well as the required curse. The slug promptly stopped squirming, though his insides did not.

"Ahh, this is the worst thing I have ever done!" Mundungus groaned. He looked down at Tonks on the floor and said, "Have you got the bucket?"

She gave a nod and patted the plastic bucket by her side for the vomiting fit that would inevitably follow the consumption of the monster slug.

Mundungus held the slug up and looked at it with something bordering on pity. "Sorry buddy." He opened wide and dropped the slug in his mouth, instantly screwing his face up as he chewed.

"ERRRR!" he yelled around a mouthful of slug. "Err, errr, errr, oh my good God this is-"

The rest of his cries were cut off in the roar of laughter that followed and a hearty round of applause from the others. Sirius grabbed Mundungus' arm and yanked it up in the air like a boxer that had won a fight.

"That's a total of thirty two points for Mundungus for the capture and consumption of one sewage slug!" Sirius yelled and applauded some more as Tonks, hand shaking with laughter, just about managed to hold the quill steady enough to add the points to the score sheet in Mundungus' column.

As the four of them continued to celebrate Mundungus opening the tournament in fine fashion, Molly Weasley entered the kitchen and glanced over at all of them rolling around in hysterics, bar Mundungus who had gone grey as he swallowed.

"I don't know what you lot think is so funny. I can't find my spatula anywhere and if I don't find it there'll be no eggs for lunch."

"Oh Merlin!"

At the mention of lunch, Mundungus leapt up, grabbing the bucket from Tonks' feet and burying his head inside it. The sewage slug was promptly brought back up, to the renewed peels of laughter of the others.

"Goodness me, what have you been eating, Mundungus Fletcher?" Molly asked, hands on hips, surveying them in surprise.

"Sewage . . . slugs!" Bill gasped, hands clamped to his aching sides.

"Why on _earth_ would he do something that ridiculous?" she raged.

"Extra . . . protein!" Tonks managed, before collapsing again.

Mundungus firmly stated, (once he was done throwing up) that he was not going to do anymore tasks today for fear that the next one might kill him, and that he wanted to die after at least having got over the shock of eating the "slimy git," as he put it.

The others had agreed and Sirius whispered to Tonks, "I didn't think he was actually going to do it, I put it on for a laugh!"

They all ate lunch, again bar Mundungus, who couldn't quite bring himself to touch anything solid (or liquid, for that matter) just yet, and then looked at each other expectantly.

"Well I can't go next, Remus isn't here," Tonks said angrily to Sirius who grinned wolfishly at her and replied that there were plenty of tasks from the others that did not involve Remus.

"We could always find Kreatcher for Bill?" she suggested, desperate to move conversation away from the possibility of her having to do a task. Bill shuddered visibly and glanced over at his Mother, who was bustling around the kitchen and casting them suspicious glances.

"Not yet, please not yet," he murmured.

"Yeah we should wait until Fleur's around," Sirius suggested with a slightly dreamy look on his face, as if he thought this was the best idea in the world.

"What about the sink water task?" Bill prompted, looking over at it hopefully. The washing up from lunch was sitting in dirty coloured water, though it looked a darn site better than it had when Sirius and Tonks had participated in the slug hunt. Bill was hoping he might get the task out of the way before things started festering in there again. "Ah, ah, you're not getting away that easily mate!" Mundungus said, still a little green in the face.

Bill looked slightly sulky but didn't say anything more.

"Alright, Tonks and the Grindylow it is then!" Sirius yelled, leaping to his feet.

"Now hold on two seconds cousin," Tonks replied. "I don't see you doing any tasks yet. Come on, what's on the list . . . here, Molly's around, get going with task two from me."

Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Tonks, do you know how obvious it'll be if I pretend to be interested in Bill _now_, after she's just witnessed Mundungus vomit up a slug? It's got to be subtle. Sly. There's an art to these things. Oh, and you lot can't be visible when I do it," he added.

"He's got a point Tonks," Bill shrugged. "Mum's not that stupid, she raised Fred and George, remember? She'll smell a rat a mile off."

"Alright, alright, let's go and see this bloody Grindylow so it can attempt to strangle me to death." Tonks stood up in a huff, promptly marching from the room with the others following eagerly.

* * *

Mad Eye Moody turned up at Grimmauld place early for the evening meeting, hoping to get some of Molly's cooking inside his grumbling stomach before the Order had to get down to business. However, due to his constant vigilance and, in no small part, his magical eye, he clocked something was wrong the second he set foot inside the hallway, carefully avoiding the trolls leg umbrella stand that seemed to plague Tonks.

_Tonks_, he thought, _that's funny, she should be here somewhere._

He stumped up the stairs, an ear cocked for strange noises. Which was not necessary at all because a second later there was a yell, the sound of something very heavy cracking and . . . water sloshing?

Mad Eye sped up and bounded up the last few steps with an agility that seemed impossible of a man with only one leg. As he did, there was another yell and a strangled yelp ... and could that also be laughter? Mad Eye was no expert on the sound, but it did sound like someone was laughing.

He charged along the corridor, wand held aloft and yelled a curse at the door from behind which the disturbing sound was coming. It burst off its hinges and shattered on the floor. The laughing stopped instantly.

"What in the bloody hell is going on here?" he roared, wand leveled at the three wizards, one witch and one . . .

"Grindylow!" Mundungus yelled, ducking instinctively and covering his head in expectation of the aging Auror's wrath raining down upon him.

Tonks seized the moment of stunned confusion to mutter a curse at the Grindylow, it's large round eyes as wide as saucers and almost popping out of it's green head as it stared at Mad Eye framed in the doorway. It vanished with a _crack_ that left a sulphurous smell clinging to the air in the bathroom. The Grindylow's sudden, and loud, disappearance seemed to bring the others back to their senses.

"Why does it take four of you to dispatch a single Grindylow?" Moody roared again and Mundungus winced visibly.

"Err, moral support?" Bill offered feebly and Moody raised his arm dangerously.

"Tonks was showing us the correct method of removing Grindylows from toilets. It's quite a skill actually, did you show her how in Auror training?" Sirius said with a barely restrained laugh, jumping out of the bathroom and up to Mad Eye with what he hoped was placating grin.

The Auror's grizzled features relaxed slightly and his wand arm lowered. Mundungus gave an audible sigh of relief, not quite ready to be turned into a ferret just yet.

Moody mumbled something under his breath about a useless younger generation that didn't learn their simple spells properly and stomped off without so much as a backwards glance.

Tonks wiped a hand across her sweaty forehead and grinned at Sirius once Mad Eye's clunking sound had disappeared into the kitchen downstairs.

"I believe," she said, gingerly stepping out into the hallway and around the fragments of the door, "that is ten points to me for successfully taking on that monster."

"Sure, even if you did get some help from Mad Eye," Sirius snorted.

Tonks opened her mouth to make an angry retort but was cut off by the sounds of the front door opening once more and a confused voice calling out up the stairs.

"I say, why is there part of a door down here and . . . is that sulfur I can smell?"

Remus Lupin's usually calm face bobbed into view as he slowly strode up the stairs. A deep line of concern cut across his forehead as he surveyed the destruction surrounding the four of them.

"Tonks just successfully beat the Grindylow in the toilet, Remus." Sirius bounded up to his mate and waggled his eyebrows at him. "Excellent Auror isn't she? Very powerful, very skilful, very s- ow!"

He was cut off as Tonks jabbed him in the ribs with her wand and he cut a sly grin at her that Remus (mercifully, Tonks thought) managed to miss as he continued to stare at the fragments of door on the ground and the few that had managed to embed themselves in the wall opposite the bathroom, very nearly impaling a painting of one of Sirius' ancestors. Said portrait was currently swearing at them with more gusto than a drunken sailor. Or a drunken Sirius, for that matter.

"How did...?"

Remus shook his head in disbelief as he gestured to the mess with one hand and looked to Sirius for some sort of rational explanation.

"Mad Eye was a bit over zealous with his constant vigilance. He may have got the wrong impression and though that we were being eaten alive by some Dark Creature."

"Which was almost what was happening," Bill said with a wry grin at Tonks who glowered back at him.

"It was a very large Grindylow," she said in her own defence.

"Yes, I'm sure it was, to have broken the toilet like that," Remus said, running a hand wearily over the coating of stubble he had not had time to remove that morning.

"Err, actually," Tonks said, blushing somewhat. "That was me. Might have been a bit off with my aim on the body bind curse and … err ... yeah, well that's what happened." She gave Remus a sheepish grin, which he returned.

"You go and get some food before the meeting mate," Sirius said, grabbing Lupin's shoulders and turning him on the spot. "You look like you could do with something to eat. No, no, we'll clean up," he said in response to Remus' protest that he would help out. Sirius marched him down the stairs as Tonks, Bill and a rather pale Mundungus Fletcher got to work with the Scourgify spell on the remnants of the door and the water soaked bathroom floor.

When the three of them were finished and Tonks had added her points into the column on the score sheet, hastily folding it back up and slipping it inside her robes, they descended the stairs, heading for the kitchen and the comforting smells of Molly's cooking. Even Mundungus was looking less ill at this point.

* * *

Four hours later, post order meeting, post meal and post Mundungus Fletcher being sick at the sight of a sewage slug caught by Sirius, (two points being added to his score column for this), Bill Weasley ran from the kitchen for his life, yelling curses as he sprinted up the stairs. He was followed from the room a split second later by Kingsley Shacklebolt, who was firing hexes at him, a red afro now adorning his usually bald head and making him look like a certain very strange, oversized fast food representative clown.

"Get me the antidote right now, Weasley, or I'll hex you into next week!" Shacklebolt roared in his deep voice, accompanied by peels of laughter from the occupants of the kitchen behind him, including Remus Lupin, who was utterly in the dark about why Bill had suddenly decided to slap hair replenishing potion on Kingsley.

"Really, I don't know what has gotten into everyone today," Molly said, as the sounds of something breaking and a pained yelp filtered down to them.

Remus, still chuckling, rose from the table to deposit his plate and mug in the sink and Tonks took the opportunity to mark down twenty well-earned points in Bill's column.

"So then, Sirius, you're the only one who hasn't completed a task today," Tonks said, grinning at her cousin.

"Have so, I caught a slug remember."

Mundungus turned green again and covered his mouth with his hand at the mention of the creatures.

"That doesn't count, it was hardly a task. Anyway, where's that Black pride? You're in last place at the moment," Tonks said, knowing that if she prodded at his ego enough, Sirius would do anything.

"Alright, alright," Sirius said, looking ruffled. He turned around in his chair and yelled at Remus, who was washing up the supper things in the sink, foamy soapsuds soaking his forearms.

"Oye Mooney, where's your chocolate? I'm still hungry."

"Sirius Black, how can you still be hungry? You had fourths of everything, including pudding," Molly said, with what was bordering on an affectionate chuckle.

"Twelve years in Azkaban'll do it," he huffed, which made Remus look over with a slightly concerned frown creasing his forehead.

"What if I were to say I didn't have any chocolate?" Remus said, with a raised eyebrow.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'd say you were lying because I saw you give some to Tonks yesterday."

Tonks saw Lupin's cheeks glow distinctly red before he turned around again, muttering something about the chocolate all being in the cupboard.

Sirius gave his full belly a pat and then got out of his chair with a resigned sigh and a dark look in Tonks' direction. He stalked across the kitchen to the cupboard and opened it up to reveal five large bars of Honeydukes best milk chocolate stacked neatly one atop of the other.

"All of it?" he mouthed to Tonks. She nodded and jabbed a finger at the sheet in front of her to indicate that that was what it said on the parchment. Sirius eyed the chocolate, then removed all five bars and brought them over to the table, laying them down heavily in front of him. Molly's eyebrows shot up and got lost somewhere in her flame-red hair.

"Sirius, you can not need five bars of chocolate!" she all but shrieked.

Sirius gave a shrug and began unwrapping the foil from around the first bar with a look of extreme distaste.

"I am not going to sit here and watch another one of you idiots throw up," the Weasley matriarch said, and turned on her heel and left the room.

Remus finished the washing up and strolled over to the table, taking a seat next to Tonks as she hastily stuffed the parchment back into her pockets. He was, however, too intent upon watching Sirius scoff down the first bar to notice this highly suspicious action on her part.

Sirius swallowed heavily, with a look that was almost as sickly as Mundungus' before opening up the second bar and throwing the wrapping over his shoulder and into the bin with practiced ease.

"Sirius, are you really this hungry or-"

"-What, Mooney?" Sirius managed to get out around a mouthful of chocolate, "trying to keep all the chocolate for yourself?" He swallowed heavily and then chucked the other half of the big bar into his mouth and chomped slowly, hitching a grin on his face in an attempt to antagonize Remus. "I shall amend you of your selfish ways by eating every scrap of chocolate you own!" Sirius declared triumphantly and Tonks held back a snigger as the decidedly ill look and the accompanying gurgling noises from his stomach suggested that Sirius was not in any condition to attempt that at all.

"You'll make yourself ill," Remus said wearily as if he could not comprehend what had gotten into his friend.

"Maybe I will, maybe I won't. But you'll think twice before hoarding all your chocolate next time won't you?" Sirius said with glee as he opened up the third bar. Lupin felt slightly queasy just watching him.

"All right, but don't say I didn't warn you," Remus shrugged.

"Of course not, mother," Sirius said in a withering voice. Tonks laughed out loud this time, though regretted it at the somewhat affronted look on Lupin's face. Sirius unwrapped the two final bars and eyed them as they sat innocently upon the table top, waiting for him to eat them, slowly melting . . .

"Maybe we could liquidize them?" he said to Tonks, as if this would make it easier to stomach that amount of food.

"Nope, eat Sirius, it says eat, which implies it has to be solid."

Remus glanced at her with confusion and something bordering on suspicion in his eyes but didn't say anything more as at that point Sirius gave a pitiful moan and clutched at his stomach.

"Padfoot, do you not think now would be a good time to call it quits with the chocolate -"

"Never, Moony, a Black does not give in, much less a Marauder." And with that, Sirius pushed both of the large bars into his mouth.

They barely fit and he had a hard time chewing, especially as with every bite his stomach was cursing him and telling him to spit it out and stop being such a fool. However, his usual thick headedness held out and he swallowed.

* * *

"Owwww, my stomach," Sirius groaned an hour later, lying flat on his back on a sofa in the library and rubbing his belly with one hand, the other clutched to his face. Tonks had long since gone to bed (having added up his points), Bill had escaped the house, having incurred Kingsley's wrath to such an extent that he decided to lie low for the rest of the evening, and Mundungus had gone off to be sick again, something Sirius was definitely considering joining him in doing.

"Would I be a terrible friend if I were to say I told you so?" Remus asked innocently, head appearing over a copy of the Evening Prophet.

Sirius grabbed the cushion from behind his head and flung it at Remus, who ducked quickly and chuckled at the muffled thump as it hit the wall behind him.

"Shut it, Mooney!" Sirius yelled, and went back to groaning.

A/N: ok everyone I now pronounce the Grimmauld Place Games Officially open!!!! The score so far stands thus:

1st place: Mundungus with 32 points

2nd place: Bill with 20 points

3rd place: Sirius with 12 points

Last place: Tonks with 10 points


	5. Round Two

The next morning's breakfast meal was subdued.

Sirius had woken up in the middle of the night with stomach cramps and was on his bleary-eyed way to the bathroom when he really did walk into Mad-Eye's room by accident, resulting in a considerably easily earned twenty points for him and a transformation into a ferret who was sent bouncing into the bathroom off of every wall on the way.

Sirius demanded that, really, he should receive Mundungus' points for having endured the transformation, but this was denied by a sleepy Tonks who couldn't be bothered to check the rules and pointed out that he shouldn't really get points for completing a task by accident. She did, however, add the points into his column.

As such, everyone was rather quiet that morning and avoiding eye contact with both Sirius, who was still feeling the effects of the chocolate he had consumed, and Mad-Eye who looked ready to hex everyone in the vicinity.

Things perked up briefly when, in an attempt to increase his points, Bill upturned the bowl of porridge on his head. However this earned him a number of hexes from Mad-Eye, who thought he had been placed under the Imperious Curse, and a slap 'round the back of the head from Molly, who stormed from the room.

Tonks knew she had to take drastic action if they were all to be saved from a day of moping around. It was time for her to add on some points.

She waited until Mad-Eye and Arthur had left for work and Molly had returned to the Burrow – only too glad to get away from the rest of the Order, whom she thought had gone somewhat insane – then snuck upstairs to Remus' room, listening at the door briefly. He wasn't inside. Tonks eased the door open slowly and slipped in.

It looked exactly as she had imagined it would: very plain, very tidy, very . . . Remus! But she didn't have time to poke around; she was an Auror on a mission.

She scanned the room quickly, eyes resting upon the bed where the sheets had been neatly folded back. On top lay his clothes for the day: a pair of faded grey trousers, brown socks, a nondescript jumper and his favorite grey shirt.

Tonks grinned and tiptoed across the room, suddenly very aware of just how loudly the floorboards squeaked under foot. She reached the bed and snatched up the shirt. Folding it neatly, she hurried from the room and back down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"What have you got-? Oh!"

Sirius' frown turned into a grin as he recognized the lump tucked under Tonks' arm.

"He didn't notice you go in?" Mundungus asked.

Tonks shook her head.

"Nope, I think he's in the shower at the moment. You need to do something about that floor though, Sirius, it's like you're poking a dragon with the sounds it makes."

Sirius sniggered and commented that it only added to the challenge.

"You're still in last place though, cousin," he added, pointing to the score sheet and Tonks shrugged.

"Plenty of time to rack the points up," she said and Sirius raised his eyebrows at her.

Whatever he was planning to say at that point exited his mind as he heard heavy footsteps on the stairs. Footsteps very unlike Lupin's normally soft ones.

"Who in Merlin's name has seen fit to take my shirt?" Remus said very quietly, a half scowl on his face as he entered the kitchen in just his trousers, hair still damp.

"Come on, I want it back," he said, folding his arms across his chest somewhat self-consciously.

"Why don't you just wear another one?" Sirius asked sweetly.

"Sirius, this isn't funny! I don't have another shirt; they're in the wash. It was you wasn't it?"

Sirius put his hands up defensively and attempted a hurt look that failed completely as he was still grinning.

"Little unfair to jump to conclusions like that, Remus, I am your best mate after all."

Tonks sat with the shirt tucked behind her back, trying desperately to cover up her sniggers as Remus ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. She was quite pleased with this task actually, and enjoying the sight of Remus all ruffled; it didn't happen very often.

"Please, Sirius, nobody wants to see me walking around all day without a shirt on, now give it back."

"Oh I dunno I think T- ow!"

Tonks gave him a jab in the ribs with her wand that Remus misinterpreted as her telling him to give the shirt back.

"Look, Tonks is being serious, Sirius!" Remus said, voice rising.

_Is Remus about to yell?_ Tonks wondered. She had never heard him yell before. Ok, it was time to give it up. Sort of.

Tonks rose from her seat, intending to edge around Remus and replace the shirt in his room and claim Sirius had hidden it. However, Remus was not quite that intent upon berating Sirius that he didn't notice her sudden movements and he saw her heading for the door with something that looked suspiciously like . . .

"My shirt!" he yelped in surprise.

Tonks stopped dead in her tracks and turned slowly on the spot, holding it behind her back and smiling sweetly at the look of utter disbelief upon the older man's face.

"You? Tonks why on earth would you take my shirt?"

"What? I can't be a Marauder as well? You think only guys can do that sort of thing?"

"No, no, that's not what I said . . ." Remus spluttered, still extremely confused as to what was going on.

"If you're going to make comments like that Remus, then I won't give it back."

He could see she was winding him up now and frowned. _Two can play at that game_, he thought.

Remus took a sudden step forward, close up to her and reached around, closing one hand in firm grip around her forearms. Tonks took a step backwards in surprise, and found herself backed against the wall, Remus leaning in dangerously close and smiling slightly.

"Shirt, now please, Nymphadora," he said in a low voice, his head so close to hers that she could feel his breath tickling her face.

Tonks knew she had nowhere to run and her eyes flicked from his mild face down to the wand in the belt loop of his trousers, then to her own lying on the table top and she gave a sigh of defeat.

Remus released her arm and placed both of his hands upon the firm stonework just above her shoulders so she could not slip away.

"Alright, alright, I know when I've lost," she said and drew her hands out from behind her back, holding the shirt out to Remus who was still smiling at her.

He eyed it for a minute, slightly unsure as to whether this was trick or not. You couldn't take anything for granted living in Grimmauld Place.

"One question," he said, flicking his gaze up from her hands still clutching his shirt to her heart shaped face. "Why did you take my shirt in the first place?"

Tonks mind did a little flip and she could see Sirius, grinning at the two of them over Remus' shoulder, clearly mouth the words, "Don't tell him anything!"

She thought for only a brief second, during which her eyes took in the man stood so close he was almost pressed against her.

"Maybe I just wanted to see what was under your shirt."

Remus was so stunned that his arms fell to his sides and Tonks slipped away from him giggling as she thrust the shirt into his limp hands and rejoined the others at the table.

Sirius gaped at her for a second then burst out laughing at the completely baffled expression on Lupin's face as he glanced first at his chest and then at the shirt. His cheeks were glowing bright red with embarrassment as he tugged the shirt on, but there was a gleam of something like happiness in his eyes as he turned and left the room, muttering something inaudible under his breath.

"I don't care if it's not in the rules, Tonks gets ten extra points for leaving Moony more flustered than I have seen him in years!" Sirius demanded and Tonks gladly added the points into her column.

"So then," she said looking at the others, "who's going next?"

-

"Come back, Kreatcher! Come on, its only water!"

Bill sprinted from the kitchen, the plastic bowl full of warm, soapy water, sloshing over his arms and soaking the sleeves of his robes, Sirius following in hot pursuit of Kreatcher who had torn from the room shrieking.

"What would mistress say? Filthy blood traitor, tormenting poor Kreatcher! It has an earring, too, and long hair, it's not right, not right!" the little House Elf wailed as he leapt towards the stairs.

"Stop Kreatcher!" Sirius commanded and House Elf found his feet pinned to the ground, unable to take another step forwards.

"Oh, oh, oh!" he yelled as Sirius picked him up under one arm and marched back towards the kitchen, where Tonks and Mundungus were clutching at the table as they laughed hysterically.

"You need a bath you stinking elf, and Bill here is kind enough to do it for you. Now be grateful!"

Sirius dropped the elf in the soapy water and his head emerged covered in bubbles so that he looked like a grotesque Santa Clause. Kreatcher spat out foamy liquid and glared at the four of them as Tonks chucked a sponge in Bill's direction.

"I can't believe I'm doing this," he groaned, mirroring Mundungus' words.

"Come off it, Bill, you work with Goblins!" Tonks said with a grin, quill poised over the parchment to add on his points.

"I don't wash their feet!" he yelled as Kreatcher poked his legs out of the bowl at Sirius' barked command. Upon seeing how much distress the task was causing Bill, Kreatcher decided that actually, he didn't mind having his feet washed all that much.

"Master says wash Kreacher's feet, yes, yes! The blood traitor will wash Kreacher's feet for him as punishment!"

"Oh, Merlin!" Bill groaned as he looked at the layers off dirt between the house elf's toes.

Bill grasped one the elf's feet with a grimace that suggested he would rather put his arm in the mouth of a dragon and began to scrub at his toes as the others broke off into peals of laughter.

"They're slimy!" he said, dropping Kreacher's foot back into the bowl and splashing himself with water that had turned a murky grey almost the instant Kreatcher had entered it. Bill's face was rapidly turning the same sickly shade.

"I can't do anymore!" he said, throwing down the sponge. "I cleaned one foot, that's it, no more!"

Sirius collapsed with laughter and for the first time ever, told Kreatcher he was a good House Elf and was free to leave the water. Kreatcher actually smiled.

"Right, Bill gets half points because he only did one foot," Sirius said, vanishing the filthy water with a swift wave of his wand. Bill, who was staring at his hands in disgust, did not protest and Tonks added fifteen points to his column.

Lunchtime passed slowly, with Mundungus – irritated that he had lost yesterdays sizable lead – working hard upon his letter to the prophet and the others eagerly awaiting that evening's Order meeting and the chance to watch each other humiliate themselves spectacularly. Remus even reappeared from his room (fully dressed this time), where he had been working on a report and sat next to Tonks at the table, which she took as a good sign considering how much she had embarrassed him that morning.

"Is, err, is Snape going to be there at the meeting tonight?" Sirius inquired of Remus in the least suspicious tone he could manage.

"As far as I know, yes. Why?" Remus asked as he finished off his sandwich.

"Oh, no reason, no reason," Sirius replied and then grinned at Tonks over Remus' head.

Tonight was going to be painful for Snape, she just knew it.

Tonks, however, became bored with waiting around for the meeting and so set about her task of charming the carpets, silently praying as she did so that somehow Molly, Dumbledore and Moody (who would probably cause her serious bodily harm) managed to avoid stepping upon them. She neglected, however, to tell the other three participants in the games that she had done this and so when five o'clock did eventually roll around and Mundungus Fletcher (water balloons stuffed in his pockets) approached the door, ready to serenade Snape the second he stepped through it and into the hallway, he found himself suddenly lifted up off the ground and flown once around the bottom floor of the house screaming, before being unceremoniously dumped upon his backside as the front door opened.

"Mundungus Fletcher. It seems Tonks isn't the only clumsy one," Severus Snape sneered as he quickly stepped into the room, careful to avoid Mundungus who was rubbing his backside and struggling upright.

Any further comment that Snape might have made, however, was cut off by a strangled yelp from Mundungus as a number of the water balloons he was carrying burst in his pockets.

Mundungus managed to stuff his hands in his pockets and save the rest of the balloons and he jumped forward, blocking Snape's escape. The potion master's lip curled dangerously and Tonks would have backed up if she hadn't been sniggering so hard.

"You are beautiful-" Mundungus began to sing in a cracked voice that was choked with barely suppressed laughter. "Oh, beautiful-"

Sirius was howling with laughter and hanging onto the banisters for dear life to stop from falling to the floor. Snape's expression was priceless; Tonks hoped she never forgot this moment.

Mundungus switched tunes as Snape gaped at him.

"And I will always love you -"

"Enough of this ridiculous behavior!" Snape yelled as even Remus finally succumbed to the urge to laugh, trying desperately to hide it at the look of sheer rage on Snape's face.

Mundungus scrambled upright off his knees and grabbed the front of Snape's robes, looking at him earnestly.

"Snape, you have such lovely hair," Mundungus said and Snape's eyes bulged like that of a soft toy that had been squeezed too hard. "It's rather greasy though. Could I wash it for you, please?"

The colour drained from Snape's face and a muscle twitched violently in his jaw. Mundungus let go of his robes and took a few steps back in fright.

"Mundungus Fletcher, I don't know what in the name of all that is good in this world has gotten into you, but-"

There was a splash as the first water balloon struck Snape square in the face.

Then dead silence.

"Run 'Dung, run!" Bill yelled.

Mundungus did not need telling twice. He turned and sprinted for the stairs, leaping up them one at a time and hiding behind the banisters, out of reach of any curses headed his way.

From this new position of safety, he yelled down, "Want me to dry you off?" and flicked his wand. Snape's black robes turned a violent shade of pink that matched Tonks' hair.

"Forty points!" Mundungus yelled and punched the air. The words seemed to break the spell on Snape and he roared with rage, jumping after Mundungus - and landing on the rug.

Snape was swept up into the air, yelling in surprise, and flew, pink robed, wet faced and livid with anger, around the hallway to the cries of Mrs. Black's portrait. The carpet tipped upside down and deposited Snape spread-eagled on the floor.

Everybody ran. Including Remus.

Sirius slammed the door to the library shut behind them, leaning upon it heavily and grinned over at Tonks who was wiping away tears of mirth.

"Now might not be the best time to give him the dartboard, might it?"

Tonks shook her head and they both dissolved into a fit of laughter.

"I don't think – don't think I should tell him … that I had crush on him either," Tonks spluttered out and Sirius roared with laughter at the sounds of Mundungus' yelps somewhere upstairs as Snape regained his composure and raced after him.

A/N: soooooo sorry for the delay!!! (Winces in fear of angry beta and fans) and the points stand thus:

1st: Mundungus with 72 points

2nd: Bill with 45 points

3rd: Tonks with 40 points

Last: Sirius with 32 points

I hope to be able to update one of my stories again this month but who knows. Hope you enjoy this and please review.

And thanx as always to my awesome beta, sockpuppet82!!!

G-V


	6. The Fall Out

A/N: Sorry (*winces and braces for massive attack from fans*) real life has once again taken me hostage!! (HELP)

Things did not calm down until Albus Dumbledore arrived to call order to the meeting and get everyone to stop sending curses at each other. Snape was still beside himself with rage and Tonks, Sirius, Remus and the others were very careful to pick seats as far away from him as possible.

After the meeting, Dumbledore approached the five of them sat over in the corner with a glimmer of mirth in his eyes and dragged Tonks and Sirius aside.

"What, might I ask, has been going on in my absence?"

"Mundungus may have drunk some dodgy potion, got a bit confused," Tonks lied with such speed that she surprised herself.

"Yeah, he's been a bit out of sorts all day," Sirius chipped in.

Something like amusement flashed across Dumbledore's face before he frowned slightly.

"Is that so Nymphadora?"

She nodded and Sirius nudged her in the ribs surreptitiously

"It is Professor, and sorry, but you know I hate people using my first name."

Feeling that this was probably the stupidest thing she had ever done, (so far anyway,) Tonks gave her wand a flick in the direction of Dumbledore's beard. Very slowly, the white strands began to writhe like snakes and then twisted themselves up into dreadlock like knots. There was a moment of stunned silence in which Tonks considered running, and glanced around the room to see numerous members of the Order gaping at her as if she had just sworn allegiance to Voldemort in front of them. Then Dumbledore began to laugh.

His shoulders shook and he chuckled with merriment and Tonks gave a sheepish grin, feeling her cheeks burning bright red with embarrassment.

"Very good Nymphado- sorry, Tonks. You have told me on numerous occasions how much you dislike that name so I suppose this was only fair punishment. Though, between you and me, I think this is actually quite an interesting style."

Dumbledore continued to chuckle, running a hand over his newly styled beard and looking thoughtful. Tonks wished the ground would open up and swallow her, (which was entirely possible considering they were in the Black house and you never knew exactly what traps had been put in place.)

"Nymphadora Tonks! What in Merlin's name has gotten into you?" Molly Weasley yelled.

Tonks flinched at the sound. The older woman had the same sharp tone to her voice that she used when reprimanding the twins. Tonks had not wanted to incur her wrath as well as Snape's in one night.

"It's alright, I believe Tonks may have swallowed some of the same potion as Mundungus," Dumbledore said and winked at her and Sirius. The two of them shot each other furtive glances that conveyed the same message; _he knows._

Molly planted her hands on her hips and glowered at Tonks before turning on her heel and heading to the table to clear away the mess from the meeting, muttering something under her breath about fire whiskey being the likely cause.

Tonks, apologising to Dumbledore profusely, attempted to slip away as the rest of the Order members who were not staying at Grimmauld place left for the evening. Sirius remained behind and she distinctly heard him say the words, "robes" and "borrow."

As she headed for the door, she felt a hand rest gently on her shoulder and steer her out of the crowd heading for the hallway and into a shadowed alcove.

"Tonks, what is going on? Are you alright?"

Tonks would have laughed at Lupin's confusion but he seemed so genuinely concerned that all she really felt was slightly guilty.

"I'm fine," she reassured him, though the frown did not slip away from his features, making him seem older and more worn than usual.

"You've been a bit out of sorts today. I mean, I understand Sirius being a little over the top at the moment, cooped up in this house and all, and Mundungus, well he has always been prone to doing silly things on occasion." Remus gave a little smile which she returned and then pressed on. "It's just, well it's not like you to jinx someone like that. And this morning, I mean, well not that I didn't . . ." he trailed off looking very uncomfortable and rubbed the back of his neck, refusing to meet her eyes.

Tonks really did laugh now and he looked up.

"I'm fine Remus, honestly. It was nice of you to ask though," she added and the frown disappeared all together from his face.

"You're sure?"

Tonks nodded and to his surprise, gave him a quick hug.

"Come on, let's have a drink."

She took Remus' hand and lead him over to the kitchen table, pulling out a chair for him and making him sit down as Molly bustled past them and out of the door, still shooting dark glances in Tonks' direction. Moody and Bill were sat down the other end of the table discussing something earnestly as they poured over a blueprint. Mundungus was rocking backwards and forwards in his chair and occasionally glancing over at Mad-Eye in a manner that suggested he was the next target of 'Dungs attention as he fought to maintain his lead.

"All right you two?" Sirius said cheerily as he flopped down in a chair opposite Remus and raised an eyebrow at Tonks as she returned with a bottle of fire whiskey and a number of glasses.

"What's this cousin? First you steal his shirt, now you're getting Mooney pissed! There something you're not telling us?"

Tonks glared at Sirius and set the bottle down before taking a seat beside Remus.

Sirius eagerly gulped down his drink and then, after a few minutes within which Tonks did not show any immediate signs of turning the chat into another task involving Remus, he became bored and shifted down the table, offering the bottle to Mad-Eye who glared at it with great suspicion.

"Just been opened, only Tonks has been pouring drinks. It's safe Mad-Eye!" Sirius said.

"Nothing's safe with you lot around," the old Auror grumbled, but took a hearty swig anyway.

Tonks and Remus continued chatting comfortably about the evening's Order meeting, and Snape's continual rage, whilst Sirius continued to top up Mad-Eye's glass and was very close to slipping a small amount of veritaserum in. Until Mad-Eye caught him.

"You!" he roared and Sirius leapt up from the table with shock, dropping the bottle, which smashed into tiny shards of glass.

"It's not what it looks like Mad-Eye," Sirius said holding his hands up defensively and backing off. "I was putting a little extra flavour in, that's all."

"If I wanted a little extra flavour I would have asked for it!" Mad-Eye yelled, brandishing his wand at Sirius.

"Sorry, sorry, won't happen again!"

Sirius yelped as Mad-Eye gave him a sharp jab in the chest and stared at him with the piercing, electric blue eye. It quivered slightly in it's socket as it all but burnt a hole through Sirius.

"Too bloody right it won't," Mad-Eye said in a dangerously low voice, "Because if it does, you'll remain in ferret form permanently."

Sirius gulped visibly and sidled away from Mad-Eye, leaving him to his conversation with Bill. He shot Mundungus a glance as he walked past, the other man looking equally as nervous, and Tonks could see that whatever had been planned for Mad-Eye that evening had been abandoned, temporarily at least.

"Sirius, that was the most foolish thing I have ever seen you do!" Remus whispered as Sirius slumped back down in a chair opposite his friend. "That's including the time you tried to climb the astronomy tower roof for a bet."

Sirius shrugged and summoned another bottle of fire whiskey over from the open cupboard.

"What on earth were you trying to do?" Remus continued not looking in the least bit impressed when Sirius knocked back three shots, one after the other, to try and rid himself of the shaking that Mad-Eye's words had left him with.

"Just loosen him up a bit," Sirius said and glanced over at Tonks. She ran through the list of Sirius' tasks in her mind until she landed on the right one. He was trying to get Mad-Eye to tell him about how he got his wooden leg.

The exchange was not missed by Remus, who looked down at his own glass of fire whiskey warily.

"Tonks, you two haven't been -"

"-No one's drugged you Mooney!" Sirius said with a snigger and Remus looked embarrassed for a moment before frowning at the other man.

"Well I can never be sure with you any more."

"You could never be sure with me in the past either," Sirius shot back and Tonks laughed.

"Why do I get the feeling there is a very funny story behind this?" she asked.

"It's not funny, it's embarrassing and I'd prefer it if you kept quiet please, Sirius," Remus said, finishing his drink and rising from the table.

"Oh come off it Remus, it wasn't that bad."

"For you perhaps. However, as the person who had endure the humiliation of Gryffindor common room seeing the whole thing, I think I rather have the last say on whether or not it was, _that bad."_

Remus cast Sirius a wry smile and turned to leave, hesitating slightly at the door, one hand resting on the frame as he looked back over his shoulder at Tonks. He seemed on the verge of saying something important, a vain struggle going on behind his eyes, but then his features relaxed into a slightly disappointed form.

"Goodnight, Tonks," he said.

"Night, Remus."

Before Sirius could add anything, Lupin was gone, closing the door carefully behind him.

"What was all that about?" he said, turning to Tonks.

"No idea."

Things slowed down considerably the next day. All four participants in the Grimmauld place games were exhausted from work and Order duties, and many of their fellow Order members were currently under the impression that they were insane.

Snape was apparently still livid and no one was sure whether or not he would turn up to the next meeting. Dumbledore appeared to be keeping their little game secret for the time being, though Sirius revealed that he had asked them to be a little more cautious about their tasks. Molly was also angry at the four of them, particularly Bill as she couldn't understand why her usually sensible son had suddenly become so immature. Moody was even more highly suspicious than usual and Tonks was more than a little worried that his magical eye might be able to read what was on the parchment hidden in her pocket. And Remus? Well, Remus was acting very strangely indeed.

"Please Sirius, I know you need the points but can you not find someone else?"

Tonks was pleading with Sirius that evening after a day during which no one had earned any points and they were all feeling a little fed up.

"Look, it says five people Tonks. I give five canary creams out to five different people and I get my points It doesn't specify who these people have to be!"

"Exactly, give one to Mundungus, and Bill too. Look he's been really depressed all day, it's a bit unfair to do this to him."

"He's probably just upset you didn't take his shirt again today. If you really want to cheer him up, get moving on that mistletoe task," Sirius said with a smirk that belied the irritation behind it.

"Sirius, I'm being serious here! Remus seems really . . . odd. It's nowhere near full moon either. Can you just leave him alone for a bit?" Tonks said finally in her most imposing Auror voice. Sirius did not seem impressed but he shrugged and gave in.

"Alright, alright, I'll find someone else. But if you end up with a canary cream, you've only got yourself to blame." He grinned and smoothed his robes a little. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a little chat planned with Dedalus Diggle this evening and some points to win."

Sirius turned on his heel and left the library, heading towards the kitchen where a few Order members were currently working out a timetable for the next month's watch duty in the ministry.

Tonks slumped down on one of the great squashy sofas in front of the fire and drew her knees up to her chin, yawning widely. It had been a very long day at the Auror office and she didn't have the energy to argue with the others over shift times. Perhaps she could just catch a little sleep here . . .

She heard the door open very slowly but kept her eyes closed. Whoever it was might go away if they thought she was asleep. She heard it snick shut again, but then the sound of soft footfalls approaching. Tonks felt faintly curious now but fought the urge to look up at whoever had just come in. Then the sofa dipped slightly as whoever it was sat down next to her.

Except she knew who it was now. She knew that musky scent and those gentle hands that laid a blanket over her. She opened her eyes slowly and looked up at Remus.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Only, Sirius said that you were in here and . . ."

Tonks smiled up at him, her head resting close to his legs.

"S'alright, I wasn't asleep."

She sat upright, drawing the blanket around her.

"I was avoiding the others," she explained and he smiled shyly at her. "Not you, I wasn't avoiding you! I just didn't fancy arguing with them again tonight."

"I understand," Remus replied. "I fixed your shifts around work for you, so you should be able to get more sleep than you have been."

She grinned at him and yawned widely again as if to emphasise how grateful she was.

"Cheers Remus."

"No problem."

They sat in a slightly awkward silence for a few moments as each of them figured out what to say next. Tonks chanced a glance up at Remus and found he was smiling at her with a slightly distant look in his eyes. He turned away quickly when their eyes met, cheeks glowing red.

"Sirius is up to something in the kitchen," he said, trying to ease the tension.

"Really? What kind of something?"

Remus averted his gaze from the fire and looked down at her to gage her reaction.

"He appears to be chatting with Dedalus Diggle about the likelihood that someone within the Order, erm . . . fancies him."

Tonks laughed and Remus smiled slightly.

"Is he having much luck convincing him?" Tonks asked, feigning surprise.

"Some. Though Dedalus is hardly the most difficult man to trick."

They both laughed quietly and then lapsed into silence again. Tonks shivered slightly under the blanket and edged up a little closer to Remus.

"He tried to play the same trick on me last week," Remus said quietly and Tonks looked up at him in genuine surprise this time.

"Maybe he wasn't tricking you," she blurted out before thinking about it. Remus gave her another small smile, his features sloped into that strange look of faint disappointment that she had seen the other night when he went to bed. This brought Sirius earlier' words back to Tonks.

"Remus?"

"Yes?"

Tonks took a deep breath, she had been planning on getting some liquid courage for this and wished faintly that she had drunk some fire whiskey earlier. None of the others were even here, she wouldn't get her points for this if they couldn't prove she had done it. Somehow though, it didn't really matter to her.

"Would you . . . would you tell me a story?"

She grimaced slightly as she realised just how ridiculous that sounded and waited for him to laugh. Only he didn't. Instead Remus looked thoughtful. Then he rose from his spot on the sofa and headed to the bookshelf, running a finger over the dusty spines of the many books there. Finally he seemed to come to a decision and slipped out one thick volume and headed back to the sofa with a quick smile to her.

"I'm afraid most of the Black book collection is not really suitable bed time reading, so this will have to do."

He sat down and opened the book on his lap as Tonks looked down at the yellowing pages. She snuggled up a little closer to him and shivered.

_How on earth am I going to manage this without looking like a complete idiot?_ She wondered, silently cursing Sirius.

"Here, I'll hold it. You read, and I'll turn the pages," she said and carefully removed the dusty book from his hands.

Remus chuckled. "Like when you were a child?"

"Ha! Not likely, mum didn't read books and Dad was always busy."

"That's a shame, you missed out," he replied sincerely.

Tonks grinned at him and gained a little more courage.

"Well, you can help make up for it then."

She shifted over to sit in his lap, registering the look of surprise on his face with glee. He appeared to be struggling greatly not to let his jaw drop but his lips twitched slightly in a smile.

"And keep me warm at the same time," Tonks added.

Remus seemed completely incapable of speech and she laughed as she opened up the book and leant back against him. This seemed to jolt his senses enough that he realised that he was not dreaming and that a pretty, pink haired witch was indeed sat in his lap currently and pulling his arms around her waist to hold the book open on her legs.

"Erm, I'm not sure where to start . . ." he mumbled uselessly and Tonks bit back another laugh.

"The beginning is a usually a good place," she suggested entirely innocently, pleased with the effect she was having upon him and stunned by her own courage.

"Right, yes."

Remus' fingers skimmed through the pages uselessly until Tonks couldn't help but laugh out loud and help him out, flicking back to the start of the book and smoothing out the page so he could read it over her shoulder. She could feel his heart beating faster than usual against her back and wondered briefly whether this was a little unfair. Then, as he started to read in a low voice, faltering at first and then growing stronger, breath whispering through her hair, she smiled and thought actually, he was enjoying this far more than a helping of Canary Creams from Sirius.

They were two pages into the story, Tonks comfortable and warm, her eyes closed as she listened to his voice conjuring up the images written on the page, when the inevitable happened and Sirius burst through the door.

He bounded into the room, grinning broadly and yelling something until he caught sight of the two of them for a second. His jaw dropped and then he began spluttering in much the same way Remus had done.

"Err, sorry guys. Didn't mean to interrupt anything, only Mundungus is about to . . . well come and see!"

Remus, who had tensed the moment Sirius jumped into the room and gone bright red, glanced at Tonks who had turned slightly against him so she could look up at his face.

"We should . . . erm, go and . . . see what's happening."

Sirius laughed and backed out of the room with a wink and a thumb up to Tonks as she slipped off of Remus lap and laid the book on the arm of the sofa. She spun round to see Remus still staring at her with a blank look on his face and chuckled. She reached out a hand and tugged at the sleeve of his jumper and he stood up, following her out of the room.

As they emerged into the hallway Sirius muttered, "thirty points!" in her ear and grinned gleefully, which Tonks suspected had nothing to do with her completing a task and more to with the fact that Remus was still blushing and refusing to speak.

A/N: alright folks!!! What is Mundungus about to do? Any ideas? And before I forget the points stand thus:

1st : Tonks with 80 points

2nd: Mundungus with 72 points

3rd: Sirius with 52 points

Last: Bill with 45 points


	7. Doxys and Dementors

"You two were looking cosy," Sirius said, the corners of his mouth twitching into a grin as he raised an eyebrow at Remus.

"I . . . erm -"

" - come on Remus, let's go and see what 'Dung's up to!"

Remus was saved from any more of Sirius' awkward comments by none other than Tonks who was propelling him with an ungainly shove up the stairs. Sirius grinned broadly at his mate in a manner that Remus took to mean that their discussion wasn't over yet, and then followed them.

As they reached the top of the stairs, the three of them were greeted by the sight of Mundungus tangled in a black bed sheet, Bill attempting to help him get it fixed over his head properly and laughing as he tripped Mundungus in the process.

"And what a fine pair of fools we have here," Remus said, watching 'Dung struggle upright. "What on earth are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm a dementor aren't I?" Mundungus said in exasperation as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh yes, obviously," Remus replied with a roll of his eyes. He glanced sideways as Tonks chuckled and felt his stomach twist slightly as her eyes caught his.

"So, why are you dressed up as a dementor?" he asked, forcing his gaze away from Tonks and feeling his cheeks glow red again.

"Gets me 30 -"

Mundungus was cut off by Sirius frantically shaking his head from behind Remus' back and he attempted to cover quickly.

"I mean, err, just to get one over on Kingsley, yeah, yeah that's it."

The black sheet in front of Remus nodded in earnest and he frowned in disbelief.

"By dressing as a dementor?"

"Duh, I'm going to scare him aren't I?"

"Right."

Tonks cracked up at the look of disbelief on Remus' face and glanced down over the banisters and into the hallway.

"Shhh guys! Someone's coming out of the kitchen!"

The five of them ducked down, peering through the gaps in the railings as Kingsley appeared from the kitchen, the low murmur of voices behind him filling the air. Mundungus struggled upright and, doing his best to avoid tripping himself by standing on the bottom of the sheet, shuffled to the edge of the stairs.

"Wooooooooo, woooooooo!" he wailed, arms raised in the air as he took a step down the stairs. Sirius slapped himself in the forehead with his palm, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Idiot, idiot, IDIOT!" he hissed as Tonks dissolved into silent fits of laughter.  
Mundungus took the next few steps quickly as Kingsley's head snapped up and he drew his wand.

"What on earth - ?"

His eyes widened as the dementor Mundungus jumped the last few steps and landed on the floor, arms held up above his head as he wailed some more, sounding somewhat like a banshee with a sore throat. Kingsley rolled his eyes in much the same manner Remus had done and raised his wand lazily. However, before he could cast any spells, the hapless Mundungus tripped on his overlong sheet and found himself connecting rather hard with the floor at Kingsley's feet.

"Bloody idiot!" Sirius roared, springing upright as Kingsley's booming laugh filled the hallway.

Mundungus was well and truly tangled within the sheet and there was a tearing sound as he attempted in vain in extricate himself from the embarrassing mess he was in.

Remus, Tonks and Bill stood upright, leaning on the banisters to watch as Sirius jumped the stairs and landed beside Mundungus as Kingsley straightened up and stopped laughing.

"Stupid, stupid, fool!" Sirius yelled, punctuating each word with a slap to some part of Mundungus body, which was followed by a yelp. "Dementors, do, not, go, wooooo!"

"Gerrof me, gerrof!"

"They, don't, wave, their, arms, AROUND!"

"I get it, I get it! I failed!" Mundungus yelled as his head emerged from under the now shredded sheet. He eyed Kingsley apprehensively, waiting for some kind of curse. Kingsley however was too amused to bother with anything of that kind.

"What were you trying to do exactly?" he asked Mundungus who was looking sheepish as he tugged the rest of the sheet free from his body.

Mundungus shrugged and looked at the sheet forlornly as he threw it at Sirius.

"It's a bit ripped, sorry."

Sirius smirked at him and muttered something under his breath about 'Dung owing him one, before Kingsley, with one last look of disbelief and amusement yelled his goodbyes to the others and left for the night.

"Failure Mundungus, means no points!" Sirius hissed as Mundungus trudged back up the stairs, a dejected look stamped across his features.

Tonks awoke early the next morning, something she never normally did. She rolled over sleepily, hugging her pillow and attempting to stifle a yawn as she struggled to go back to sleep. She had been having a very nice dream, something to do with a story book and Remus and . . . well she couldn't remember the rest, but she had woken up before they got any further than just reading and if she went back to sleep, maybe she would get to see how the dream turned out . . .

However, Tonks was an Auror and her Auror sense were tingling far more than they should do at this ungodly hour and were therefore not allowing her to slip back into the warm fuzziness of sleep. She sighed a heavy sigh and silently cursed her choice of career before opening her eyes and turning the other way. Then she yelled.

"Sirius! What in Merlin's name do you think you are -"

Sirius waved his arms frantically and pressed a finger to his lips.

"Shut up!" he hissed and Tonks, having gotten over the shock of finding that her cousin had crept into her room, managed to sit upright and glare at him, gathering the duvet around her to hide the Chudley cannon pyjama's that she had been given for her seventeenth birthday. They were bright orange and clashed appallingly with her spiky pink hair that was currently looking dishevelled.

Sirius grinned at her and flicked his wand lazily at a chair, sending it gliding smoothly across the room so he could sit down.

"Good morning to you too," he said in a cheery voice that set Tonks' teeth on edge. How dare he be so happy at this time of the day?

"By the way, you were talking in your sleep."

Tonks face drained of colour as she recalled the dream. She grimaced as she asked, "What was I saying?"

"Oh something along the lines of, "oh Remus, you're so handsome" and -"

He laughed as Tonks threw a pillow at his face. Catching it, he smoothed out the creases and chucked it back on the bed before grinning at her again.

"Seriously though, you _were_ saying his name. It was a good dream I hope?"

"Yes, but not along the lines you're thinking Padfoot," Tonks growled. "Now, back to my earlier statement, what the hell do you think you're doing in my room?"

"I was awake and thought someone else ought to be too."

Tonks scowled at him and Sirius hastened to give a better explanation as she was dangerously close to pelting him with further pillows.

"I need someone to help me shift the crate of Doxys into Hestia's room."

Tonks brightened up considerably at this and grinned at Sirius as she slid out of bed and shrugged on her dressing gown.

"Falling behind in points are we?" she asked and Sirius looked uncomfortable.

"Failed miserably with the Moody task, he's too, too . . ."

"Vigilant?" Tonks suggested innocently and Sirius grimaced.

"Yeah, that'd be about right. Basically, I'm not getting anywhere with that task and good luck to anyone else who's got to attempt a task with him in it."

Tonks, who was crouched on the floor as she tried to fish her slippers out from under the bed, glanced up at her cousin briefly to see he was looking agitated. Clearly the heated competition was getting to him.

"What about Dedalus? Remus seemed to think it was going well?"

Sirius shook his head.

"It was, then he and Moody ended up swapping plates and Mad-Eye got the canary cream that was meant for Dedalus. He went psycho on me that was why I left the room so quick! Anyway, after that, Dedalus didn't believe a thing I said to him. So that's another failure."

Tonks chuckled and straightened up as she slipped her feet into her comfy slippers and grabbed her wand.

"No worries, at least that's one of your five canary creams ticked off the list, and I'll give you a hand with this and then we'll get down to some serious task work today!"

Sirius grinned and cheered up.

"You should have seen Moody," he said as the two of them tiptoed from the room and out into the corridor. Someone in the house was snoring and the sound echoed in the silence. "He sprouted all these feathers and his scary eye was doing back flips he was so angry! It was fantastic!"

Tonks stifled a laugh as they passed Hestia's room, not wanting to wake her up.

"What about the group tasks?" she asked as they slipped into what had been Fred and George's room before the twins had gone back to Hogwarts. It was full of left over mess from their experiments and Tonks was careful not to touch anything considering that even a sweet wrapper was potentially dangerous in their hands.

"We can get going with one if it'll get the competition back on track a little more. Some of us seem to be getting distracted by other things," he said pointedly, raising an eyebrow at Tonks and smirking. She blushed red and ignored the comment, heading towards the crate in the corner instead.

Sirius sidled up and glanced down at the box. It gave a violent shake and then was still again.

"How are we going to do this without being attacked?" he pondered aloud, tapping his wand against his chin.

"Weasley no fire fireworks!" Tonks exclaimed, eyes falling on a package sat innocently upon the side table under the window. She picked it up gingerly and tipped out the contents. Three fireworks slid into her palm.

"We don't have time for that now Tonks," Sirius said irritably as he stared at the crate.

"No! Put the fireworks in the crate, then shove it into Hestia's room and slam the door! She'll get the shock of her life!"

Sirius's frown blossomed into a wide, dangerous grin, a glint of mischief in his eyes.

"We really are related!" he exclaimed and Tonks nodded proudly and tossed the fireworks to Sirius. He placed them atop the crate and the two of them managed somehow to levitate it out of the room quietly and into the hallway. They stopped outside Hestia's room and Sirius glanced sidelong at Tonks.

"Right, on the count of three, I'll tap the fireworks with my wand, shove them in the crate and then you open the door. Got it?"

Tonks nodded and gripped the door handle.

"One,"

Sirius pushed the three fireworks part way into the crate through a slit in the top.

"Two,"

Then tapped them with his wand.

"Three!"

He shoved them all the way in yelled, "NOW!" and Tonks flung the door open in time for the crate to levitate through, She slammed it just before all hell broke loose.

There was a huge CRACK! as the three fireworks exploded into life inside the crate, followed by loud sizzling and screeching noises and then the unmistakeable sound of angry Doxy's buzzing around the room.

The two conspirators glanced at each other, burst out laughing and then sprinted down the stairs, as the door to Hestia's room burst open to reveal Hestia in her dressing gown, screaming as four Doxy's attacked her hair against a background of exploding stars and green and yellow sparks.

Sirius slid down the banisters laughing as Tonks jumped the last few steps with surprising grace and the two of them ran for the kitchen as the yells of the other Order members, awoken by the explosions filled the corridor.

"I want to see you mark twenty points down in my column please, dear cousin," Sirius said as they collapsed against the door, and listened to the unmistakable voice of Remus Lupin yelling a charm to clear out the Doxy's, accompanied by Mundungus' laughter.

Tonks laughed as she added the new points onto the piece of parchment that had become very worn over the past few days. The edges were also singed for some reason, though Tonks didn't bother trying to fathom that one out.

"Oh dear me, it would appear the young Weasley twins left something of a surprise for us," said a cheerful voice, growing clearer as it approached the kitchen.

"That's Dumbledore!" Sirius yelped, the colour draining from his face. "I didn't know he stayed here last night!"

"Neither did I!" Tonks replied, hastily furling up the parchment and stuffing it into the trouser pocket of her pyjamas.

The kitchen door opened as Sirius and Tonks seated themselves at the table, doing their best to look innocent, and apparently failing miserably as the second Dumbledore set foot in the room, his piercing gaze swept over the two of them and he winked before continuing to speak to Hestia Jones who was looking a little worse for wear, her hair standing up on end and a shocked look on her face.

"I shall have to have a little word with them at some point about leaving their products lying around the house."

Dumbledore drew out a chair for the elderly witch as she nodded earnestly and slumped down, drawing her dressing gown tighter around her. Sirius stifled a snort of laughter.

"I don't suppose the Daily Prophet has arrived yet, has it?" Dumbledore asked, the corners of his mouth twitching slightly as Sirius attempted to keep a straight face.

"Not yet. It'll arrive half way through breakfast as usual."

He passed Tonks a significant glance that made her fight a grin off her face as Dumbledore set about making tea for Hestia who was trying to straighten out her hair where the Doxys had attacked it.

Remus arrived in the kitchen a few moments later, accompanied by Bill and Mundungus who gave Sirius a surreptitious thumbs up when the others weren't looking.

"Good morning Tonks," Remus said as he sat down heavily in the chair next to her and gratefully accepted the tea that Dumbledore placed in front of him. "Sleep well?"

Sirius choked on a mouthful of toast and had to wash it down quickly with his tea as Tonks glared at him.

"Yes thanks," she said, softening her gaze as she turned it on Remus. "You?"

Remus nodded slowly and smiled as he replaced his mug on the table in front of him.

"Though, I found my sleep was rather rudely interrupted by a succession of rather loud explosions and some irritable Doxys which needed sorting out. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you, Nymphadora?"

Tonks failed entirely to reprimand him for the use of her hated first name as she fought to keep the innocent look on her face.

"Of course not."

This only seemed to confirm Remus' suspicions and he rolled his eyes and glanced over at Sirius.

"You are a bad influence," he whispered when Hestia was busy talking to Dumbledore.

Sirius shrugged and grinned.

"Tonks had it in her all along, I'd say she's a better marauder than you Moony."

Remus bit back a remark as he glanced over at Tonks who was watching the exchange with a pleased expression.

"Look Sirius, I don't know what you think you're playing at," Remus said, leaning in closer so they wouldn't be over heard. "But this is getting a little -"

His words were cut off however by a loud rattling noise and a sudden screech as an owl zoomed out of the fireplace and deposited a pile of soot covered letters and newspapers upon the table. Sirius reached out for the pile, dusting the items off as the owl stuck out its leg and Bill tucked a knut in the little pouch. It screeched once more and flew back up the chimney sending a little cascade of soot down into the grate.

"Two letters for Tonks, official ministry ones by the looks of it," Sirius said as he tossed the envelopes in her direction. "One for Bill, its got the Gringgots stamp on it. You in trouble at work mate?"

"It'll be about that new regulation hair cut," Bill replied with a wink as Sirius went on.

"Nothing for 'Dung as per usual, because he has no friends. Nothing for Moony because he's too boring to even receive mail. Hestia, one for you," Sirius chucked an envelope in the old witch's direction and she jumped as it fluttered down in front of her. Sirius chuckled as he continued to rifle through the mail, handing it out to the occupants of the kitchen.

"Three copies of the Daily prophet, oh look, I'm on the front page again and looking more handsome than ever in this mug shot, isn't that nice? And finally, something for you, Albus."

Dumbledore looked up with something bordering on suspicion in his blue eyed gaze. Then he reached out a hand and accepted the magazine that Sirius tossed in his direction. Tonks watched out of the corner of her eye as Dumbledore removed the plastic wrapping and glanced down at the cover.

"Sirius, I believe this may have been addressed incorrectly."

"Really?" Sirius asked indifferently. He finished off his breakfast and looked up at Dumbledore's serene features. "Why's that then?"

"You have just passed me a copy of the magazine, "which witch weekly." I wonder, are you aware of the contents of this magazine, Sirius?"

Remus covered his face with his hands and shook his head as Sirius grinned.

"Yeah, lots of lovely pictures of the most beautiful witches in the entire magical world and various, interesting, articles," he replied. "Used to have a subscription when I was at Hogwarts, got mis-delivered to Moony one day. Not that he'll forget that in awhile."

Sirius smiled casually at Remus who grimaced and took a quick mouthful of tea.

Dumbledore smiled and frowned slightly before passing the magazine over to Sirius.

"Then I think, considering the contents, you might enjoy reading this a little more than I would. However, I would be interested to learn how the magical post department managed to get the address so terribly wrong?"

"Drunk on the job I expect," Sirius replied with a completely straight face. "Now, anybody want a biscuit with their tea? Custard Creams?"

A/ N: ok folk's here's another bite for ya! The points stand thus:

1st : Sirius with 104 points (2 points for one of the canary crèmes)

2nd: Tonks with 80 points

3rd : Mundungus with 72 points

Last: Bill with 45 points

Happy Thanksgiving! Please review and feel free to correct any mistakes you find!!! Thanx G-V


	8. Ode to Gilderoy Lockhart

A/N: Hello, everyone! So sorry this took so long I am aiming to have another update for you soon. And for those of you nice enough to read With a Twist I will try to get the next chapter up soon. The operative word being try.

Please review G-V

It was Molly Weasley, Mundungus and Bill who were the unfortunate recipients of a canary cream each. Tonks, who had remembered her conversation with Sirius from the night before, avoided taking one and managed to make sure that Remus didn't either. Moody also appeared to have learnt his lesson, though failed to mention anything to the others until they were all sprouting yellow feathers.

"Sirius Black!" Molly screeched as she stared at her arms in disbelief as the feathers began to malt and drift onto the floor. "You are the most immature, most ridiculous, most -"

"Now, now Molly, it's all in the spirit of fun," Sirius said, eyeing Dumbledore with disappointment. He had been rather looking forward to seeing the old headmaster sprout feathers, but clearly Albus was a little wiser than to accept food from the last of the Blacks. Unfortunately, it left Sirius in the awkward position of needing one more person to eat a canary cream, and now no one trusted him.

"That's not fair, we're in this together!" Mundungus hissed under his breath at Sirius who raised an eyebrow and grinned as some feathers drifted down into 'Dung's cup of tea.

"There was nothing in the rules about not playing tricks on each other," Sirius stated simply as Bill laughed and attempted to turn his feathers into a Mohawk style haircut.

Hestia Jones was looking very confused by the time she left for work a few minutes later accompanied by Moody, feeling much shaken after the morning's events and looking at the sandwiches Molly had handed her with a nervous expression. Sirius jumped up the second he heard the front door close and sprinted upstairs without another word to the others.

"Now where on earth has he gone in such hurry?" Molly said as she swept up the feathers and deposited them in the bin with a glance in Bill's direction that made the laughter die on his lips and the Mohawk feathers wilt.

"I don't know, and quite honestly, I don't want to," Remus replied. He looked over at Tonks with a slight smile and she grinned sheepishly. She knew exactly where Sirius had gone and Hestia was not going to be a happy woman when she got back to headquarters this evening.

"Well, I shall leave you all now I am afraid. Have a very pleasant and productive day," Dumbledore said beaming at them all, gaze resting on Bill, Mundungus and Tonks for a little longer than necessary and making Tonks feel almost as sheepish as Remus had. He gave them all a little wave as he exited the kitchen which only Molly and Remus managed to return with any great enthusiasm.

"You err, you used your makeup today mum?" Bill asked suddenly.

Molly looked over at him with confusion and more than a hint of suspicion in her eyes.

"No dear, I didn't have time after all the commotion this morning. Why?"

"Oh no reason, really. You look nice," Bill covered hastily. Mundungus sniggered but Molly smiled at her son like he was an angel, which with his halo of yellow feathers, he did somewhat resemble currently.

"You are a dear Bill. Now if only your other siblings were as lovely . . ."

Bill tuned his mothers voice out as he looked over at Tonks and mouthed the words "wand polish" to her. Tonks too, stifled a snigger at this point, and made a mental note to check all her makeup just in case Bill had decided to play a trick upon her as well. She guessed as well that it was probably lucky that Arthur hadn't had time to shave this morning if Bill was onto these tasks, and that he might want to get a new razor very soon.

"Well then, I had best be off to work as well guys."  
Bill rose from his chair and made sure to pass close enough to Tonks to lean down and whisper to her.

"Make sure you're at the Order meeting this evening, I've got some major points to win!"

He gave her a significant wink and then slipped out of the room, his mother now eyeing Tonks with increased suspicion. Remus too was looking a little confused as he glanced over at the excited expression on Tonks face and she had the sudden, horrible thought that Remus might have got entirely the wrong idea about the whispered conversation.

Indeed his expression right now was one of badly disguised disappointment and he rose from the table, mumbling something about needing to tidy his room as he left the kitchen.

Tonks watched him leave, feeling her insides squirming with guilt. This was all starting to seem a lot less funny the more concerned Remus became. However, there were still her tasks to complete; she might be able to make it up to him through them.

She jumped up from her seat, very nearly knocking it onto the floor and strode quickly out of the room after him. She managed to catch up with Lupin at the top of the stairs, one hand poised to open his bedroom door as he glanced over his shoulder at Tonks.

"Hey, Remus."

"Hello," he replied awkwardly, looking everywhere but her eyes. Tonks felt another stab of guilt as she watched him rub the back of his neck, the same self conscious action he made whenever he was feeling uncomfortable.

"I, umm, I've been given this job, for the Order," she began, taking a step towards him, careful not to trip herself up in the process. "I was wondering, if you could perhaps help me out with it?"

Lupin's eyes brightened for a moment, then the blank look he always wore fell into place.

_He's trying so hard not to look disappointed_, Tonks thought. _Does he really want me to like him, to fancy him, maybe? _  
"I suppose so. I mean, of course, I'll do anything I can to help."

Tonks forced a grin and reached out for his hand, leading him away from his bedroom door.

"Ace! Right then, come with me!"

Remus looked completely lost for a moment as she pulled him towards her room and then he seemed to regain some measure of composure as he realised that she was taking him into her room.

"Erm, Tonks, I thought you wanted some help with work -"

"-I do Remus. Now sit here," she summoned a chair which dropped down in front of him and wobbled dangerously before he stuck out a hand to catch it. "And close your eyes for a moment."

Lupin was past being disappointed now and into the realm of utter confusion, but he obeyed Tonks request and sat down heavily and closed his eyes tight. He sat like that for almost five minutes, listening to her move around the room and her occasional comments as she stubbed her toe or tripped over something.

"Right, ok then, open your eyes."

Remus did so, to see Tonks stood self-consciously in front of him wearing a black dinner dress, her pink hair now shoulder length.

"What do you think?" she asked, smoothing out the creases as Remus began blushing furiously and twisting his hands in his lap. "Too much? Or not smart enough maybe?"

"I, ummm, you look, I mean, I don't know. . ." Remus began rubbing the back of his neck again and Tonks giggled slightly.

"I have to go on a date, as an undercover thing for the Order. I want you to help me pick something to wear," she explained.

Remus relaxed, very slightly, and allowed his eyes to rest on her again.

"Why did you ask me?" he asked quietly.

"Would you want Sirius giving you fashion advice?" she asked seriously, hands on her hips and Remus smiled.

"No. But then again I am hardly an expert either, I mean look at my clothes."

Tonks waved his comment away and looked at herself critically in the mirror, deciding there and then that actually, Sirius was not heartless and evil for coming up with this task, but actually a complete genius.

"I couldn't ask Molly, she's too fussy. And anyway," Tonks turned around to look at Remus again. "I trust your opinion."

There was a second where Tonks held her breath, waiting for his response, waiting to see whether he would merely come up with another excuse as to why he was unsuitable for the job. Then he smiled.

Remus' face split into a bashful grin and he ducked his head, self-conscious once again, but happily so. When he looked up at Tonks finally, he swept his eyes over her and then let his gaze lock with hers for the first time since they had shared breakfast with the others.

"I think you look beautiful," he said quietly. "You always look beautiful."

Sirius was grinning broadly when Tonks sat down in the library that afternoon to make a start on her report for work. And she knew full well why.

"You were listening in weren't you?" she said simply and Sirius shrugged.

"When I hear Mooney's voice with a girl's, I automatically assume something is about to go horribly wrong. I was merely looking out for you both."

"Oh how very noble of you Sirius," Tonks said with a sarcastic smirk and he nodded.

"Glad to be of service." He pulled out the tatty parchment with the scores on and tapped Tonks' column. Her score increased to ninety points and he frowned at it critically, noting that his lead had slipped away. The he folded the parchment up and slid it back over to Tonks.

"So, how did it go?" he asked. Tonks shrugged and Sirius sighed with frustration. "What did he say? Did he make suggestions, did he get all embarrassed? Did he leave?"

Tonks threw her quill down irritably, managing to nock over a bottle of ink and spill it across the report. She flicked her wand at the mess and began siphoning away the dark stain as she answered Sirius.  
"He helped, sort of. And yes, he did get embarrassed, which was very sweet. And he . . ."

Tonks trailed off as she finished replacing the spilt ink in the bottle with her wand. Sirius looked up expectantly.

"What? Come on Tonks, details!"

She pulled a face at him and then muttered something quietly.

"Sorry, didn't catch that," Sirius said.

"I said," Tonks replied a little louder, "he told me I was beautiful. He said he thought I always looked beautiful."

Sirius looked very thoughtful for a moment and Tonks looked around at the door because she could hear other members arriving back from work ready for the evening meal before tonight's meeting.

"He said you were beautiful? Not, sexy or, I dunno, anything else?"

Tonks laughed.

"What's wrong with beautiful? I thought it was really sweet."

"Oh sure, it's very Mooney. But you know, he could have said a bit more couldn't he?"

"Yeah he could have gawped at me and made ridiculous comments," Tonks replied sarcastically. "Look, I thought it was very nice of him. And anyway, I think he might think that I and Bill are sort of, together."

Sirius looked stunned and Tonks immediately explained to him what had happened after he had left the room that morning. By the end of the explanation, Sirius was looking worried.

"Damn it! He'll get all funny about this, I just know it, he'll think it's his fault."

"Why would he think that?" Tonks asked horrified.

"Because he's Mooney and he's a pain in the arse!" Sirius exclaimed throwing his hands up in the air. "But, we can fix this. Tonks, that mistletoe task -"

" - I've got it planned out Sirius, don't pester!" she said, feeling irritable once more.

The two of them managed to avoid any more arguing about tasks however, as a terrible shriek sounded from upstairs, which promptly set Sirius' charming mother screaming in the hallway again. They sprinted from the room, Sirius vaulting the sofa in his haste to shut the painting up because she was screaming something about werewolves which clearly meant Remus was close by and he didn't want his mate's pride hurt further.

"Abomination, filth, horror!"

Sirius and Tonks stopped in their tracks as they entered the hallway. Mrs Black was indeed screeching, but it was not her voice that had shrieked those three words. Tonks looked over at Sirius and raised her eyebrows.

"You really did complete that task didn't you?"

He nodded, eyes fixed on a point at the top of the stairs.

"Sirius," Tonks asked very slowly, "what did you do to Hestia's room?"  
Further explanation was unnecessary however, as at that point the shaking, wide eyed figure of Hestia Jones appeared in the hallway above them, accompanied by Remus and Arthur Weasley. Arthur was missing a rather large amount of hair and staring at his razor with confusion.

_Twenty points for Bill,_ Tonks thought as Hestia continued to scream blue murder about the state of her bedroom. _And another ten for Sirius. If he survives this. _  
"Why has my bedroom been turned into a shrine to, to . . ."

Hestia wailed some more and a very flustered Remus placed an arm around her shoulders in an attempt to calm the woman down. Sirius made a move towards the stairs at that moment and Tonks, not wanting to miss out, joined him as they headed towards Hestia's bedroom to see what had happened. Mad-Eye Moody, Kingsley and a number of other Order members were huddled in the doorway, a few laughing.

Tonks pushed through the group to get a better look and gaped at the site before her.

"Gilderoy Lockhart! You turned Hestia's room into a shrine to Gilderoy Lockhart?"

The room which had previously been just as drab as any other in the house, was now painted in a startling gold from ceiling to floor. The curtains had been replaced with pink drapes and on every surface was a smiling, winking portrait of Gilderoy Lockhart. The bookcase which had previously been stuffed full of volumes on dark magic, now contained the complete works of Mr Lockhart's, as well as a number of autographed photos. The bedspread had been changed to one of Gilderoy majestically riding his broom past a dragon and rescuing a princess, the scene playing over and over again as the radio in the corner warbled a song entitled "an ode to Gilderoy."

"I think I might be sick," Tonks said as she gaped in disbelief at the unbelievable change that had taken place in the room.

"Looks like dark magic to me," Mad-Eye said, scanning the smiling faces in disgust. Tonks wouldn't have put it past the old Auror to blast every one of the pictures into oblivion.

"Must be an old trick of the family's. You know, to throw the Ministry of the scent if they came round looking for evidence of dealings with Death Eaters. What upstanding citizen doesn't like Gilderoy Lockhart?"

Sirius said it with such a straight face that even Tonks believed him. Almost.

"Yes, that would seem a likely explanation."

The little group in the doorway whipped around to see Dumbledore staring at them serenely. His eyes glimmered with mirth as he took in the scene behind them.

"Dear Hestia has said she will move to another room, so it shouldn't be a problem. We can deal with this after the meeting I think."

Sirius smirked at him and Tonks withheld a snigger valiantly as the Order members trooped down the stairs and into the kitchen.

A/N: Ok peeps here are the scores

1st: Sirius with 122 points

2nd: Tonks with 90 points

3rd: Mundungus with 72 points

Last: Bill with 65 points


	9. Embarrassing Moments

A/N: Hey! Would you look at that! 2 Chapters at once! If you guys are really good with the reviews maybe you'll see a third? G-V

Tonks paused in her report to the Order about the ministry's leads on Sirius as the kitchen door opened. She looked up, a little put off by the interruption and by the fact that she had caught Remus staring at her. He had promptly looked away, blushing slightly, but Tonks didn't have time to ponder on this as Bill Weasley's head appeared around the door. Only, he looked quite different.

"Sorry I'm late folks, couple of difficult cases at work that dragged on."

He grinned as he looked around the room, noting the wide eyed expressions of the others as they took in his appearance. Molly Weasley looked like she might explode with suppressing the comments she was clearly dying to make.

"Very nice, Bill," Sirius remarked as Bill Weasley, complete with brand new, electric blue mullet, sat down beside him.

Bill winked and glanced over at his mother. Molly was gaping like a fish and twisting her hands in her lap, Arthur muttering something in her ear in an attempt to calm her down.

"Err, right, where was I . . ." Tonks coughed slightly to get everyone's attention, but their eyes were still glued to Bill and his haircut. Bill crossed his arms over his chest and the sleeves of his shirt road up to reveal a large, black tattoo of a dragon on his right arm. Molly's eyes all but popped out of her head.

"I think you were onto a sighting in Bermuda," Dumbledore prompted with a smile and Tonks nodded appreciatively and attempted to pick up where she had left off.

The rest of the meeting was made very difficult by Bill who kept raising his hand and tugging at his sleeves to draw everyone's attention back to his new style, and Molly who had turned very white and glared at him continually much to everyone else's amusement.

When the meeting was over, Molly sprang up from her seat and charged like an irate rhino towards her son. Bill gulped visibly and attempted to duck out of the way and behind Mad-Eye to whom he had been chatting.

"William Weasley!" Molly yelled and Tonks and Sirius burst out laughing. "What on EARTH have you been doing to yourself?"

"Help!" Bill yelped meekly to his father, who merely shrugged and gave his son an apologetic smile.

Molly grabbed Bill's shirt sleeve and yanked it up so she could see the dragon tattoo better.

"Look at this, look at this! Scarred your lovely skin!" she shrieked and Bill turned so red it would have put a tomato to shame.

"It's not a scar mum, it's a tattoo and it's cool."

"Cool! Cool! You look utterly ridiculous! And this!" Molly gestured furiously to his hair, "what is this?"

"Gringotts' new regulation hair cut?" Bill offered and winced as if Molly's gaze was causing him physical pain. She spluttered at him in fury until Arthur put a soothing arm around her shoulders.

"Now now dear, Bill's just being silly. Aren't you son?"

Bill nodded violently and Arthur smiled.

"See, he'll change the hair back."

"Of course, yep, definitely," he said rather more enthusiastically than was necessary. "Err, the tattoo's permanent though. It is very cool though, Fleur likes it, and Charlie will too and the kids . . ." Bill trailed off at the murderous look on his mothers face.

Arthur could see this wasn't going to get any better until his wife calmed down and he led her away from the group, saying his goodbyes to the rest of the Order over his shoulder as he edged out of the door, careful not let Molly see Sirius and Tonks hanging onto each other as they laughed at the scene they had just witnessed.

Sirius shook Bill's hand, the younger man still quite pale as he stared at the space his mum had just vacated.

"Congratulations Bill," Sirius said, "for managing to make your mother angrier than even I can manage!"

Bill smiled nervously and watched as Tonks added the points to his column.

Once that was done with and Bill had disappeared upstairs to return his hair to normal, Tonks made her way over to the corner of the room where Remus was discussing something seriously with Dumbledore. His eyes left Dumbledore's and connected with Tonks' as she headed over, smiling casually.

"Wotcher Remus!" she said, tipping her head to him grinning as Dumbledore gave her a wink and slipped away.

"Good evening Tonks," he said, trying to match her relaxed tones. "That was a very interesting report you gave."

Tonks pulled a face, thinking that this was a very strange comment to make considering how boring everyone, including herself, had found it.

"Not nearly as interesting as Bill though," she said with a grin and Remus raised an eyebrow as he smiled and conceded the point.

"Yes, what was that all about?"

Tonks shrugged.

"Dunno but it didn't improve Molly's mood did it?" Tonks said. "Boy does he look ridiculous with blue hair."

"Sorry, this coming from the Auror with purple spikes currently?" Remus teased. Tonks gave him a mock scowl.

"Thought you said I was beautiful?" she replied, then bit her lip at the sudden realisation of what she had said.

Remus paused momentarily, the smile on his lips diminishing slightly, but growing in his eyes as he looked at her.

"I did say that didn't I," he mused, "and I meant it too."

Tonks tried her absolute hardest not to blush but knew instinctively that she had failed. Instead, she suppressed the goofy grin that she could feel growing and grabbed one of the biscuits from the table, taking a bite so as to have something to do other than stare at the man in front of her with puppy dog eyes.

Unfortunately for Tonks, if she was intending to save herself embarrassment and the thought of looking ridiculous in front of Remus, eating one of those biscuits was the last things she wanted to do.

"Sirius!" Tonks yelled as there was a pop and yellow feathers burst from nowhere, covering her body.

She looked around to see Sirius laughing hysterically and reached for her wand, the feathers drifting off her robes and skin now and falling like snow around her.

Sirius saw her sudden movement and eyes sparkling with mirth he sprinted from the room, Tonks following in hot pursuit as Remus stared at the feathers surrounding him on the floor and chuckled.

After Tonks had cursed Sirius enough times to satisfy herself that he would never do something that ridiculous to her ever again, she retreated to the relative safety of her bedroom to finish up her report for work.

She was just putting the ink bottle and her quill away when there was a soft knock at the door. Tonks looked up with a slight frown, wondering if perhaps Molly had come back looking for an explanation as to Bill's ridiculous behaviour. But Molly was less subtle than to knock.

"Tonks?"

The voice that whispered her name through the door made her frown disappear instantly, though she was no less confused.

"Come on in," she said, carefully sliding the score sheet underneath a pile of papers from the Auror office so it was no longer visible. Remus Lupin appeared in the doorway, framed by the faint light from the corridor, a second later.

"Sorry if I'm disturbing you," he said, noticing the mess strewn around her bed where she had been sat working.

"Oh, it's nothing. Just finishing up something for Scrimgrouer." Tonks gave a mock yawn and rolled her eyes, "Booooooring."

Remus chuckled slightly, one hand resting upon the door, holding it ajar and the other in his pocket. He looked down at his sock clad feet momentarily, running something over his mind, then he glanced back up at Tonks who was looking expectant and slightly amused.

"I was just wondering if you'd like a drink? If you're not too busy, or too tired after work and the Order and -"

"- No a drink would be great! Thanks Remus."

Tonks sprang off the bed, (very nearly falling, but somehow steadying herself,) and approached Lupin.

"Well, come on then!" she said grinning at him as he stood there still, eyes locked onto hers.

"Err, yes, right."

He smiled and stepped aside so Tonks could get past.

As she strode to the stairs, Remus following, Tonks thought she heard a quiet laugh from behind Sirius' door but brushed it aside. It was late and Sirius was still licking his wounds after losing a fight with an Auror, he'd be asleep. Wouldn't he?

Tonks frowned at the door but kept walking, trying her absolute hardest not to trip over the trolls leg umbrella stand as she skirted around it and into the kitchen.

"I just thought, you know as we didn't get to speak much earlier, thanks to Sirius, that we might talk now," Remus said as Tonks took a seat and he strolled over to the cupboards and fetched them a couple of glasses.

"Butterbeer or firewhiskey?" he asked as Tonks looked up. "I'm afraid that's all Sirius has bothered to stock the cupboards with."

"Firewhiskey would be good," she said and he brought the bottle over, sitting down in the chair next to her.  
Remus poured out the drinks, sliding a glass across to Tonks, their fingertips brushing briefly as she caught it. He stared at the liquid in his glass for a very long time, swilling it slowly around and around, then he took a quick gulp and half the contents of the tumbler slid down his throat. He replaced the glass on the table and looked up at Tonks, a cautious edge to his gaze.

"Tonks, what is going on?"

She was caught entirely off guard by his question and hastily swallowed a mouthful of firewhiskey to hide her surprise.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," he said, a hint of humour creeping into his otherwise serious tone, "what is going on with Sirius and Mundungus and Bill? And, you?"

"Nothing Remus, you're being paranoid," Tonks lied, swallowing the rest of the contents of her glass to keep the guilt away. She refilled her glass as she watched him contemplate her words carefully.

"I don't think seeing whispered conversations between you and Bill is being paranoid, is it?"

"No, maybe it's just being jealous."

Tonks almost choked on the next shot of firewhiskey she had taken as she realised what she had just said. She looked up at Remus apologetically to see all traces of humour gone from his otherwise mild features.

"So, I take it you and Bill are . . . together."

"No!" she replied a little too quickly. "No, we're not! Bill's with Fleur, or did he not tell you? Err, never mind. But me and Bill, nothing going on there, nothing at all," she stressed a little too enthusiastically.

Remus brightened slightly but didn't look entirely placated.

"You're not?"

"No silly, I like . . ."

Tonks cut herself off with another drink, feeling a hot blush rising up her face.

_Oh Moody was right, Aurors shouldn't drink! Constant vigilance Tonks, constant vigilance!_ she thought, then remembered the task that Bill had set her. There was no way on this earth she was going to manage to keep seven shots of firewhiskey down!

"I see. I . . . well, sorry, I suppose it was a little unfair of me to -"

" - No it's fine Remus. Anyway, thanks for inviting me down ," Tonks said, aiming to move the topic in a more comfortable direction. Remus still seemed a little anxious that he had irritated her. She laid a placating hand upon his wrapped around his glass and he glanced up at her face, a small smile spreading across his lips.

"So," Remus said, leaning back in his chair, "what do you think Bill is going to do to get back in his mother's good books?"

_Oh God! The makeup! Oh Bill, you are dead!_ Tonks thought, drinking another shot and trying not to let her amusement show. However she was drunk and therefore camouflaging her feelings about as well as her hair, which

was currently a very, very bright pink.

She gave a lopsided grin and attempted to throw Remus what was supposed to be a sly wink, however it looked more like she had something stuck in her eye and Remus couldn't help but laugh.

"You've drunk rather lot already Tonks," he remarked, refilling his own glass as she nodded at him earnestly and continued to grin.

"Oh yeah well, I'm supposed to have seven."

"Seven? Who said you had to have seven?" Remus asked with mirth. "I certainly don't think it would be a good idea for you to have that many."

"Bill said it," she slurred slightly as she slid Remus' glass out of his fingers and into her own hand with a smile. She swallowed some of the amber liquid and leant back in her chair, planting her feet on Remus', her toes nudging his leg.

"Bill said it?" Remus mused, glancing down momentarily at the stripy yellow socks now touching his grey trousers. "I see. And, why exactly did Bill say this?"

"Oh well, it's part of the -"

"Oh sorry you two, I seem to keep interrupting don't I?" Sirius yelled loudly as he burst through the door, covering up the last part of Tonks reply. He shot her an exasperated look and then turned on Remus.

"And You matey! That's my cousin you're getting good and plastered there! I thought you were the responsible one!"

Remus spluttered for a moment until Tonks began laughing.

"It's not his fault it's Bill's remember, he -"

"I think Tonks here might need to go to bed!" Sirius yelled loudly again and Remus looked at him in confusion, clearly wondering whether Padfoot hadn't been drinking as well. "Moony, as you got her in this state, you had better take hr upstairs."

"Sirius, I'm not that drunk," Tonks said. "I've only had . . ." she grabbed the bottle of firewhiskey and held it up, "Oh, rather a lot actually!" she laughed and Remus shook his head in disbelief as she stood upright, wobbling precariously.

"Here, Tonks, Sirius is right. I'll give you a hand."

Feeling extremely self conscious, Remus wrapped an arm around Tonks' middle as the alcohol combined with her usual clumsy nature left her teetering dangerously in the middle of the kitchen floor. Sirius gave Lupin a wink as they left the kitchen that Remus returned with a frown as Tonks sighed with frustration.

"Look, really, I'm not very drunk, I'm just -"

" - Tired, tipsy and naturally unable to remain on your own two feet?" Remus asked as they climbed the stairs.

"Erm, yes actually. I suppose when you add the three together you get me falling over and hitting my head."

"A scenario I would wish to avoid at all costs," Lupin added.

Tonks grinned at him as they reached the top of the stairs, Remus having steered her around Kreacher who had appeared form one of the spare bedrooms muttering things under his breath.  
"Right then. Goodnight Tonks," Remus said as they stopped on the landing.

"Hey?" she said, arching her eyebrows in confusion.

Remus glanced over his shoulder, the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile as he lowered his gaze.

"This would be your bedroom, Tonks."

She looked away from his eyes momentarily to the door behind him to see that Lupin was in fact correct and they were stood outside her bedroom door.

"Oh yeah. Right then, erm, I suppose I'll see you in the morning?"

Remus smiled slightly again and nodding.

"I'll be up bright and early with a hangover cure waiting for you," he said and she swatted him playfully on the arm.

"Not funny Remus."

The effect of her words was rather undone by the broad grin that had spread across her features and she watched him stuff his hands in his pockets as he surveyed her. She knew full well that he only did that when he was resisting the urge to rub the back of his neck, which meant he was feeling embarrassed. Why was Remus feeling embarrassed?

Lupin bounced on his toes slightly, as he let his gaze wander back up to her eyes and then glanced quickly over his shoulder again.

"So, erm, yes, goodnight then!"

"Yeah, 'night Remus. Oh and thanks for helping me out."

Remus was about to protest that really he hadn't done very much to help, when Tonks leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his cheek, lingering for a moment, before drawing back, a small, self conscious smile that mirrored his own touching her lips.

"See you in the morning," she said and then brushed past him, one hand trailing over his shoulder as she headed into her bedroom, leaving him stood in the corridor, hands still in his pockets and a warm flush touching his face.

A/N: AWWWW isn't that cuuute!!!! And a big laugh for Bill huh.

Anyways the scores stand thus,

1st: Sirius with 122 points

2nd: Bill with 95 points

3rd: Tonks with 90 points

Last: Mundungus with 72 points


	10. Bucking Broom Ride

A/N: And here's three wow that's a lot in one weekend! Enjoy

Remus was right, Tonks did have a hangover.

However, the pounding in her head was not what woke her up the next morning. No that honour fell to Mundungus, who had chosen five o'clock in the morning as the appropriate time to complete his task of letting off no fire fireworks.

The last of the Weasley supply had gone whizzing up and down the corridors, scaring the wits out of all the Order members in the house, who jumped out of bed in their pyjama's, wands in hand, and congregated in the hallway expecting death eaters to appear any second.

"Nice PJ's Tonks!" Sirius yelled from across the hall as he headed back into his bedroom after Arthur Weasley had contained the fireworks, and the more jumpy Order members had been reassured that they were not in fact under attack. Those who had to go to work later had already begun to descend the stairs for an early breakfast, whilst the rest returned wearily to their beds.

Tonks grunted in reply, shielding her eyes from the light and holding one hand against her forehead. As she turned around to return to her room and go back to bed, she felt a warm hand press against the small of her back and Remus Lupin's tired but relatively cheerful face came into view. He leant down closer to her so the others would not overhear his words.

"Would you like that hangover cure now, or later?" he said and Tonks noted the amused edge to his tone.

"Now would be nice," she groaned and she distinctly heard him chuckle before he leaned away again.

"They are rather lovely pyjamas," he added a little louder, making Bill, (hair back to normal,) smirk at the two of them. Tonks didn't even have the energy to scowl at him as she followed Remus downstairs.

Remus pulled out a chair at the kitchen table beside Emmeline Vance for her and Tonks flopped down, thanking him as he wrapped his sweater around her shoulders to keep out the cold air flowing in through the many drafts. He strode over to the cupboards and rummaged around through the bottles for a moment, searching for something that appeared to be buried right at the back.

"Ah ha!" he said, returning a second later with a small phial held in his hand. He tipped it's contents out into a mug and handed it to Tonks, who looked at the red, brown liquid that was steaming slightly, with distaste.

"What's in this Remus?" she asked, wrinkling her nose as she sniffed at it.

"It's best you don't know," he replied, sitting down beside her and summoning over a cereal packet and two bowls. "Just drink it and be grateful it works."

Tonks nodded and took a large gulp, shuddering as the liquid slid down her throat leaving a taste that was somewhat like chilli, behind in her mouth. Her stomach stopped churning though and she could feel the headache beginning to dissipate slightly.

"Thanks," she muttered around another mouthful and Lupin gave her a cheery smile as he poured out a full bowl of cereal.

"Right, I'm going to work early," Moody grumbled as he stumped from the kitchen, a piece of toast clutched in his hand. "I'm not spending any more time in this house than I have to."

Tonks was sufficiently recovered to laugh quietly as he left the room, glaring around at the Order members seated at the table with his electric blue eye and growling at Sirius as he entered the room, the grin disappearing instantly from his features as he nearly walked into Mad-Eye.  
"What's up with him?" Sirius asked, jerking a thumb over his shoulder as he dropped down in a vacant chair opposite Remus and Tonks and propped up his feet on the table, much to the disapproving glare of Emmeline.

"What?" he said, shrugging at her and summoning the piece of toast from her hand and into his own. "It's my house."

"Subtle, Sirius, subtle," Tonks joked as she finished the last of Remus' hang over cure, feeling as bright as she did every morning now. She sent the cup floating over to the sink where it disappeared beneath the soapy bubbles and Sirius raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"You didn't break it!" he said, and Remus chuckled beside Tonks.

"No, I can be very graceful when I put my mind to it," Tonks replied, summoning Sirius' stolen toast into her hand before he could take a bite. He cast a reproachful look.

"Why do you trip over the rest of the time then?"

"Because it requires far too much effort not to," Tonks said and let out a sigh of annoyance as Sirius summoned back his toast and ate it before she had a chance to mutter another charm.

When the rest of the Order members had become fed up with Sirius' tactics for getting himself breakfast and had left for work, Sirius turned his attention to the two people chatting and laughing together in front of him. Things had gotten far too cosy for his liking.

"So Tonks, I hear you were thinking about changing your hairstyle," he said loudly, interrupting their conversation. Tonks looked up in surprise and Remus raised an eyebrow at his mate.

"What?"

"You mentioned that you weren't sure about having it pink anymore," Sirius prompted, stressing the word pink and staring directly at Tonks in an attempt to jog her memory.

_Pink? What? Pink, pink, pink . . . oh damn it! _

Tonks had to put a lot of effort into not letting her eyes widen in surprise as she remembered the task Sirius had set her. He smirked slightly as he saw the look of understanding dawn on her features and then sat back, ready to enjoy watching Remus squirm!

"Oh yeah, yeah. I'm not sure how it looks anymore. What do you think Remus?" Tonks asked, turning to him suddenly.

Remus looked utterly confused for a moment, caught off guard by the question. What exactly did she want him to say?

"I think pink is lovely," he managed to get out and Sirius rolled his eyes. Tonks looked thoughtful for a moment, though Remus did not realise that this was due to the fact that she had just realised how difficult it was going to be to get him to say the phrase that she wanted, rather than really considering his words.

"Lovely? Hmm, lovely's not very interesting though is it?"

"I don't think anyone could call pink boring!" Remus said.

"It just looks lovely?" Tonks continued, glancing up at him. Remus shifted uncomfortably on his chair.

"It looks beautiful, Nymphadora," he said, hoping that was enough. Tonks beamed but Sirius cut in.

"Beautiful? You won't get guys with hair that looks beautiful, you need hair that looks sexy," he said.

No, subtlety really was not his strong point, Tonks thought. Neither was patience.

She glared at Sirius.

"Well Remus likes it!" she replied, and Sirius smirked again.

"He said he thought it was beautiful, not sexy."

Remus gaped at Sirius and made frantic gestures at him behind Tonks' back to shut up. Sirius merely shrugged and pretended he couldn't understand as Tonks looked over at Remus.

"You think it's sexy, don't you?" she asked, doing her best not to burst out laughing as he flushed red.

"I . . . erm, well . . ."

Tonks folded her arms across her chest and glanced up at him, eyebrows raised expectantly. Remus gave a sigh of exasperation.

"Well, yes, I suppose so."

"Suppose what?" she prompted, aware that Sirius wasn't going to give her the thirty points until Remus said the exact phrase.

"I suppose, I suppose . . . well, yes I think pink hair is sexy."

Sirius cracked up and howled with laughter at his mate. Remus turned if possible, an even deeper shade of red, that even Ron Weasley would have struggled to match. This was not helped by the fact that Tonks, laughing slightly, gave him a grateful kiss on the cheek.

"See, that wasn't so hard to say now was it Moony?" Sirius said.

Remus glared at him.

A mere two hours later, Sirius stood out in the hallway, facing his mother's portrait and grinning with the kind of glee that made Tonks, who was stood beside him, gulp nervously.

In his hand was a broomstick. However, unlike most broomsticks that Tonks had had the pleasure to ride, this one was bucking and jerking violently and she had to be careful not to get knocked over backwards by the thing.

"It's a bit . . . over zealous, maybe, isn't it Sirius?" Bill suggested as he eyed the broomstick with mounting apprehension. Mundungus who was stood a few paces behind Bill, nodded violently in agreement with Bill's statement.

"Come on mate, not scared are you?" Sirius said, still smiling manically.

"Of course not!" Bill replied with a surety that he clearly did not posses, as a moment later his shoulders sagged and he gave a nervous smile. "Only, we did have a rule that these tasks shouldn't cause anyone bodily harm."

Sirius shrugged and gripped the handle of the broom a little tighter as it gave another ferocious buck.  
"Tonks isn't afraid," he said.

"That's because Tonks is an Auror!" Bill spluttered and Tonks swelled with pride.

"Come on Bill, you're not going to be the only one to forfeit a group task now are you? Oh the shame of it!" Sirius said, a little louder than he had meant to, and his mother's portrait muttered something behind the curtains on the wall. Sirius eyed it maliciously.

"Bill get ready with the stop watch and Tonks, hand me the quaffle. Mother never was any good at quidditch in life, let's see whether being dead has improved her skills."

With that, he mounted the bucking broom and caught the quaffle as Tonks threw it up to him. Sirius took off into the air, circling the group on the ground once, before the broom gave a sudden jerk that very nearly unseated him. He clung on however, and forced it to swoop down lower so he could take aim at the portrait on the wall. Tonks covered her ears against the tirade she knew would ensue.

"Score!" Sirius whooped as the quaffle struck the painting right in the middle. The tatty curtains burst open and Mrs Black screamed in rage as the grinning face of her son came into view, bobbing around as the broom stick continued to buck and jerk.

"FILTH, BLOOD TRAITOR! SCUM OF THE EARTH! BEFOULING THE HOUSE OF MY FATHERS!!! OUT, OUT SCUM -"

Her tirade was cut off as Sirius struck the screeching banshee of a woman square in the face with the quaffle. It bounced back into his hands and he sped off up the stairs, bouncing the quaffle off as many paintings as he could manage. His great grandfather took one to the nose, a distant cousin received a quaffle to the stomach, and one particularly well aimed shot hit a portrait of an old and well loved family cat as it attempted to scuttle away from Sirius and behind a chair.

"Time's up!" Bill yelled and Sirius flew over the banisters and landed in the hallway, dismounting the broom smoothly and bowing low as the others cheered and applauded.

"Tonks, please hold this whilst I see to mother dearest," he said, shoving the angry broomstick into her outstretched hands.

Tonks gripped it tightly as Sirius strode up to his mothers portrait.

"FILTH, TRAITOR, SCUM -"

"Oh shut it you old bat!" Sirius roared and jerked the curtains shut in one swift movement.

"That is a grand total of seventy points for Sirius, for nailing three portraits and Mrs Black twice!" Bill said, clapping Sirius on the back and watching as Tonks added the points to Sirius' already considerable tally.

"Thank you, thank you," Sirius said, bowing once more. He straightened up and grinned at the three of them. "So, who's going next?"

Tonks had never been much of a flyer. She could ride a broom no problem, but she had never been on the quidditch team, and more difficult manoeuvres were hard for her, what with her natural clumsy streak.

So it was with great trepidation that she mounted the broom and struggled to hold it still as Bill reset the timer.

"Ok Tonks, three, two, one, GO!"  
As Bill yelled go, he threw the quaffle to her and she caught it two handed. Bad move, considering how hard the broom was trying to throw her off.

Tonks was thrown forwards, sliding right to the end of the broom, and she would have tipped off, if it had not at that moment decided to shoot upwards at such a sharp angle that she slid back down again and was able to regain her grip.

On the ground, the others who had been holding their breath waiting for her to hit the ground, burst out laughing and yelled encouragement as Tonks attempted one handed, to force the broomstick to turn towards the stairs. It obeyed begrudgingly, giving another sharp buck which almost unseated her, and then she was away, taking careful aim at the portraits of her family members.

"I say!" one rather fat man in a suit yelled as the quaffle struck his portrait and knocked over a tankard of butterbeer clutched in his podgy fingers.

She execute a sharp left turn and wheel right around in order to grab the quaffle as it bounced back, just catching it with her outstretched fingers. She span around again and launched the quaffle at the next painting, watching with glee as her great, great grandfather, a notorious hunter of werewolves, was knocked backwards off his horse and into a grimy looking lake.

"Thirty seconds left Tonks! Aim for mother!" Sirius yelled at her, and she forced the broom to change direction once more and head back down the stairs. She streaked towards Mrs Black's portrait and let fly with the ball in her hands.

"AHHHHHHHH FILTH, FILTH, FILTH, SHAPE SHIFTING, PINK HAIRED, FREAK!"

Tonks landed and jumped off the broom, Sirius catching her as she stumbled across the floor and nearly tripped on the carpet. Once he was sure she had caught her balance, he yanked the curtains across his mother's portrait once again.

"That's forty points for Tonks! Nice one!" Bill said, giving her a broad Weasley grin. "Impressive flying," he added.

"Cheers. You're up next!" Tonks said, and handed Bill the broomstick that seemed to be getting more and more irate by the minute.

When Bill took off, it was clear that all those years of practicing in the garden at the Burrow had paid off.

He expertly took the quaffle and struck three paintings within thirty seconds, executing a perfect nose dive to retrieve the quaffle and then spinning around again to take a shot at a group of Blacks who were toasting one another. As the little party screamed their annoyance, Bill caught the quaffle and pelted back down to the hallway, grinning as he took his shot at Mrs Black.

"TRAITORS! TRAITORS! YOU DARE TO INSULT THE MOST NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!"

Her shrieks were cut short once more as Bill jumped off the broom and flicked his wand at the portrait, snapping the curtains closed.

"Excellent shot Bill, excellent shot!" Sirius exclaimed as behind him, Mundungus was knocked flat by the broom before he had even mounted it.

"Blimey Bill, impressive flying!" Tonks said and he gave a mock bow. "You got sixty points."

Tonks flattened the score sheet out on the side table and added his points to the column before turning to look at Mundungus. He had struggled upright and gripped the broom with two hands, looking at it as if it might bite him.

"Ready 'Dung?" Sirius asked enthusiastically as he noted the extremely nervous look on Mundungus' face.  
"No!" 'Dung yelped, but held the broom a little tighter.

"Fantastic, well when you're ready with the stopwatch Bill, we'll get going," Sirius said, paying no heed to the fact that Mundungus was struggling to mount the broom.

When he had finally got on, (with Bill and Tonks holding him steady for the moment), Sirius called a countdown. When he yelled "Go!" the others leapt aside and watched as Mundungus shot upwards into the air. There was a moment where it looked like he might gain control, and then suddenly he was flipped upside down, hanging on by his knee's.

"Help! Help! Don't just stand there laughing, this thing's going to kill me!" he screamed as the broom whizzed up and down, side to side, bucking ferociously and trying to dislodge 'Dung. As he passed over the three of them on the ground once more, a trickle of stolen items began to fall out of his pockets and bounce around on the carpet, including a rather fat, purple frog that let out a croak of joy and hopped away into a dark corner.

"AHHHHHHHHH!" 'Dung yelled as he was flown, upside down still, up the stairs, head knocking on the steps. He crashed off the walls and into various portraits. The quaffle, long since abandoned, floated away and hovered next to Sirius.

"Serves you right!" one portrait of a sour faced old witch yelled, and shook her fist as Mundungus flew past screaming. There was a chorus of agreement from the other portraits that turned to yells as 'Dung flew into the celebrating group that Bill had struck with the quaffle on his go.

"Time's up 'Dung!" Sirius yelled as he struggled to contain his laughter.

The broomstick continued to bounce the hapless Mundungus off the walls as it shot back down stairs, heading straight for Mrs Black's portrait. 'Dung struck it face first, upside down and the curtains sprang open for a final time.

The look of absolute horror on Mrs Black's face made Tonks double up with laughter. The evil old woman screamed as if burned as Mundungus thrashed madly and tried to right himself.

"DIRT, NOT FIT TO LICK MY BOOTS! YOU DARE TOUCH ME! OUT, OUT, OUT, HORRORS!"

Mundungus gave a yelp as the broom bucked again before shooting off, and he dropped to the floor head first, crumpling into a little heap at the foot of Mrs Black's portrait.

Sirius marched forwards, stepping around Mundungus who was rubbing the numerous bruises that had appeared, and jerked the curtains closed.

"Bye mother, hope you had as much fun as we did!"

He gave a cheery wave and turned around to face the others.

"No points! Mundungus, you are bloody useless!" he said, helping the little man struggle to his feet as Tonks and Bill continued to roar with laughter.

Remus shut the front door cautiously as he stepped into the hallway, trying his best not to wake Mrs Black. He shrugged off his coat and was about to head upstairs when something caught his eye.

He strolled over to the side table in the corner, blocking out the strange mutterings of the portraits; it sounded like Sirius had been irritating them all morning whilst he had been out. A piece of tatty parchment that had clearly been folded and unfolded many times over, lay spread out on the table top.

Remus looked around, but the corridor was deserted. He picked up the parchment gingerly, a frown sliding into place as his eyes scanned the page. It looked like a score sheet.

_A score sheet for what? _

And then something clicked.

This was what had been going on! This was why Tonks and the others had been acting so strangely, they were having a tournament. A tournament that seemed to involve embarrassing him as much as possible.

Well, he could have a little fun with them too.

Remus replaced the parchment on the side, careful to put it back exactly where it had been before, and hands in his pockets, whistling a little tune and with a small, knowing smile on his face, he headed up the stairs.

A/N: OH NO REMUS KNOWS!!!! What is he going to do? And here are the scores for this chapter

1st: Sirius with 192 points

2nd: Tonks with 160 points

3rd: Bill with 155 points

Last: Mundungus with 82 points


	11. Parchment and Pranks

A/N: Ok guys (and gals!) here's the last chapter until February. I have exams so there's nothing I can do. Please review!! G-V

"Sirius Black, can you not sit still for five seconds!"

"Sorry Molly," Sirius said and sat on his hands as she glared at him, a wooden spoon dripping soup tucked under one arm.

When the Weasley matriarch had turned around once more to continue the cooking, Sirius began fidgeting again, causing Remus to look up over his copy of the evening prophet.

"Really Sirius, have you managed to get itching powder in your clothes again?" he asked, eyeing Sirius suspiciously.

Sirius stopped scratching his arm and began shifting around uncomfortably on the chair until Mundungus piped up.

"Sirius has got ants in his pants," he said and Tonks, currently seated beside Remus, (though she was tilting her chair at a precarious angle and would most likely be seated on the floor very soon,) suppressed a snort of laughter. Sirius threw her a dirty look and continued scratching.

"Shut it 'Dung, at least I don't look like a Goth that's had a fight with the black makeup."

Mundungus scowled and folded his arms, the bruises covering his face more prominent in the bright light of the kitchen.

"No, I don't know what it is. Not mosquito's, they don't like the house," Sirius said.

Yes, one if the perks of Grimmauld place (if you could call it that) was that even the mosquito's that normally plagued London in summer could not stand the state of the place. Mad-Eye had once suggested that they had an inbuilt sense of evil and could be very useful as detectors of bad wizards. Which would at least explain all the jam jars full of them on the side in his office, Tonks had thought, especially considering she couldn't imagine him naming them and keeping them as pets. She had to suppress another laugh as an image of a child Mad-Eye, complete with wooden leg and crazy eye, muttering the words "constant vigilance, Ernie" to a pet mosquito, popped into her mind.

Sirius continued to scratch and wriggle and squirm until Molly spun around again, draw strings of her apron flying out as she brandished the spoon at him.

"If I didn't know better Sirius, I'd say you'd been spending too much time in the mangy dog form of yours and had fleas!" she hissed at him.

Sirius let his mouth fall open in mock surprise and then put on an affronted face.

"Now I know you don't think much of my house, and I may be an escaped convict, but I do not have fleas!" he protested and Tonks rolled her eyes at him. She glanced over at Remus, wondering whether he was going to jump in with some quip or anecdote about Sirius' transformations at Hogwarts. She was surprised to note a small smile on his face, his eyebrows raised in a particularly sarcastic manner.

"It's possible though," Bill said, as he finished peeling carrots for the soup and dropped them into the broth. He was still doing his best to get back in his mother's good books and had jumped at the opportunity today to help her with any menial task. "If I remember correctly, Charlie ended up with dragon pox after spending too much time with them in Romania."

"You could always try asking Minerva whether she's ever discovered she has caught a cat related illness," Remus suggested. "Or you know, if she's ever had a fur ball."

Everyone in the room gaped at him, eyes wide and Remus retreated behind his paper with a small smile as Tonks began to snigger.

Once Sirius had managed to get his head around the horrible image of McGonagall coughing up a fur ball in a transfiguration lesson, he began his scratching act again, much to Molly's disgust.

"Take a potion," she said irritably as she finished cooking and began spooning out soup into bowls.

"Potion for what?" Arthur Weasley asked as he appeared at the kitchen door accompanied by Mad-Eye, Kingsley and Hestia who all seated themselves around the table, Moody levitating his chair to move it further away from Mundungus.

"Sirius has fleas," Molly replied with a withering glance in the offender's direction. Sirius grinned back and scratched his head.

"Fleas?" Moody said, eye quivering in its socket as he peered at Sirius. Sirius gulped.

"Possibly," he said and made a great show of trying not to scratch as Kingsley was laughing and Hestia looking a little worried as she wriggled away from him surreptitiously.

"Serves you right for not being more vigilant against house hold pests," Moody said, entirely seriously. Tonks choked on her soup and Remus gave her a pat on the back and one of his small smiles that made her glow inside.

"Maybe we should give you a proper bath Sirius?" Kingsley suggested with a straight face. "Scrub behind the ears and all that. I actually know a very good formula for bubble bath that'll rid you of those irritating -"

" - All right, all right," Sirius said grumpily.

However, Sirius continued his scratching all the way through the meal, stealing glances at the other Order members to catch all their slightly nervous reactions. All, that was, apart from Remus, who was currently too engrossed in conversation with Tonks to notice anything but her and Sirius snorted slightly, wondering whether he had done enough to warrant his points. If he just asked Tonks whilst she was busy grinning like a smitten fool at Remus then she would probably say yes anyway.

_Alright then,_ he thought, taking another mouthful of the delicious soup and feeling slightly guilty as he glanced over at Molly, _time for the next task._

Sirius stopped scratching to grab a couple of Fred and George's puking pastels and shoved them into his mouth whilst the others weren't looking. The effect was immediate and he was grateful for the sink's close proximity.

Even Remus and Tonks looked up when Sirius jumped up, sending his chair clattering to the floor and sprinted for the sink, promptly throwing up down the drain.

"Bloody hell Sirius!" Kingsley said as Sirius straightened up looking a bit shaky. "Looks like you picked up more than just one bug!"

"He was probably shovelling it down too fast," said Molly, continuing to eat her soup.

"I was not!" Sirius yelped, fighting the urge to throw up again and thinking that Fred and George had a fine future ahead of them if they continued to come up with such amazing creations.

"It was that soup that did it!" he continued, clutching at the sink and wondering whether he could get away with a charm to make his face look a little whiter.

Mundungus dropped his spoon instantly and the others eyed the food, Tonks could almost see the cogs in Mad-Eye's brain whirring as he wondered whether he had been poisoned too. She was brought back to reality within an instant as Molly fumed at Sirius.

"How dare you suggest that my cooking . . . utterly outrageous . . . slanderous . . . in all my years . . ."

Arthur gave a weary sigh and attempted to calm his wife as Bill helpfully piped up that he thought the soup was lovely and that Molly was the best cook in the world. His efforts earned him little more than a glare however.

"Are you sure you haven't just consumed something you shouldn't have?" Remus said in a very calm voice.

"Yeah, that soup!" Sirius said and Tonks flinched as Molly flicked her wand in his direction and suddenly Sirius was sprouting carrots from his nostrils.

"You cook it next time then!" the red headed women yelled at him.

Remus began to chuckle beside Tonks and she felt his leg brush hers momentarily as he rose from his seat and leant over Sirius' bowl, looking it over with a critical, professor's eye. Tonks noticed him slip something into his pocket and then straighten up, saying, "I don't detect anything wrong here, Sirius," and returned to his seat beside Tonks.

Sirius grumbled something and headed back over to the table, having removed the carrots from his nose. He sniffed the soup and eyed Molly warily before dipping his spoon in again and taking a mouthful. Two seconds later, his shocked face could be seen running for the sink again as he promptly threw up and Molly yelled at him once more as if it was his fault.

"I . . . but . . ."

Sirius, wide eyed and confused, gaped at the soup sat innocently on the table.

"That shouldn't have happened," he muttered as he levitated the bowl over to the sink and disposed of its contents, surreptitiously covering his nose in case Molly cursed carrots up it again.

Tonks was distracted from any further attempts at revenge Molly might have made however, as she felt Remus' hand press against hers under the table and push something into her fingertips. It felt almost like parchment and she went to glance down at it but Remus caught her eye and gave a slight smile and shake of the head.

Tonks continued to stare at him with confusion and he leaned in close and whispered in her ear.

"Wait until the others are gone."

He drew back and gave her another significant look that made her silently wish that everyone else would suddenly develop Sirius' symptoms and rush from the room. Perhaps it was a note about some Order business, or, about some more personal business maybe?

Whatever it was, she would have to wait a little longer to find out as the others were now continuing to eat very slowly and warily in silence, barring Sirius who was merely sat with his arms folded across his chest, glowering at them and still fuming about the carrots.

When they eventually got up to leave, Sirius attempted in what he clearly thought was a cryptic manner, to get her to accompany them for another task.

"I'll be along later," she assured him and he glanced between her and Remus before shrugging and leaving with Bill and Mundungus.

As Kingsley, Hestia and the rest jumped to help Molly with the clearing up and therefore improve her mood, Tonks felt Remus' hand press against hers again momentarily and that same thrill that made the soft hairs on her arms rise spread up through her. He stood up, smiling at her and nodding slightly, before levitating the dishes to the sink and leaving her to look at whatever it was he had pressed into her hand.

Tonks glanced downwards at her hand which was balled into a tight fist and uncurled it slowly.

"I have a map I need you to look at Lupin," Moody said gruffly as he stumped past Tonks and she closed her hand again reflexively. Not that it would do much good with that eye on her. "And you too Shacklebolt."

"All right. In the library is it?" Remus asked

Moody gave a grunt of assent and left the room, both of his eyes fixed forwards and Tonks breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn't thought to look over at her. That breath hitched slightly as Remus' hand rested on her shoulder briefly.

"Good night Tonks," he said, his smile the same, mild, warm one he always gave her.

"Night Remus," she replied, quieter than usual.

Tonks watched him go, and did not move her hand until Kingsley had shut the door behind him and all she could hear was Molly and Hestia gossiping as they leaned against the stove and the rustle of paper as Arthur scanned through the copy of the evening prophet that Remus had left behind.

Very slowly she glanced back down at her hand and uncurled her fingers. All at once she was confused and a little disappointed as the familiar rainbow wrapping of a Weasley sweet came into view, and then she noticed something tucked away inside it. Tonks drew out a small scrap of parchment that had been carefully folded over so that it was small enough to fit inside the wrapper, which only now she realized had probably been used to house the sweets Sirius completed his task with. Any thought however, of why Remus had chosen this to hide the parchment in, was wiped from her mind as she slowly read the thin script inside.

_Tonks, I wanted to make sure you knew that, despite my hesitation to say so this morning, I really do think pink hair is sexy. But please forgive me if I prefer to call you beautiful in the future._

Tonks worked extremely hard to stop her hair from flashing different colours in delight as she very carefully refolded the parchment and slipped it into her pocket. Molly was eyeing her suspiciously over Hestia's shoulder as they continued to gossip and Tonks slid out of her chair, managing not to knock it flying, and crossed the room, wondering whether Mad-Eye would hex her if she strode into the library this instant to tell Remus exactly what she thought of him too. In the end she decided that Mad-Eye would probably think that she had been imperious cursed, and she did not wish to discover what it felt like to be turned into a ferret. Also, there was the fact that Remus had chosen to tell her in such a small, secretive way, that she though he probably wouldn't appreciate her blundering in there and smothering him with kisses. Then again . . .

Tonks settled for re-reading the parchment several times as she strode towards the basement, (having formed a pretty good idea from the occasional pained yelp exactly where the others were), her face melting into a dopey grin as she fixed the words in her mind and tried to imagine the expression upon Remus' face as he had written those words.

"What took you so long?" Sirius asked as she descended the basement stairs, having tucked the parchment away in her pocket again safely. "And why the hell have you got a sweet wrapper in your hand?"

Tonks felt her fingers crush the plastic wrap and she vanished it with her wand before turning to her cousin who was eyeing her very suspiciously.

"It was you wasn't it?"

"What?" she asked, looking over his shoulder at where Mundungus was trying to convince Bill that, actually, the thing in the wall did not want to eat his arm as two rats had disappeared earlier on and it was probably full.

"You put the puking pastels in my soup!" Sirius said, hands on hips in what could have passed as a good imitation of Molly.

"No, Sirius," Tonks said in the most patronising voice she could muster, "you put puking pastels in your soup."

Sirius looked indignant.

"No I did not, I ate one after a mouthful of it. I'm not stupid enough to put them in the food!"

Tonks frowned at him and then something clicked into place.

_Remus!_

She couldn't believe it of him! He was such a gentleman! But then again, he had been a marauder and he did have that wonderful cheeky glint in his eyes sometimes . . . He must have slipped it in when he went to inspect the food.

_But if I tell Sirius, he'll want to know how I know!_ Tonks thought. There was no way on this earth that she was letting her cousin get hold of that scrap of parchment.

"It must have been the after effects," she said simply, though Sirius was not to be dissuaded from the conclusion he had jumped to that easily.

"So why have you got a sweet wrapper then hmm?" he said as if he had her caught now.

Tonks rolled her eyes and pushed past him to get a better look at what the others were doing.

"I was cleaning up the mess you left on the chair so Molly wouldn't figure out what you had done, obviously," she said and Sirius relaxed and muttered a word of thanks to Tonks.

Bill looked over at Tonks as she stopped, facing the hole in the wall. He had beads of sweat on his brow and for someone whose job it was to break curses for Gringotts, he was looking decidedly nervous.

"I'm really not sure about this," he said as Mundungus scanned the score sheet Tonks had retrieved from the side table earlier.

"You need the points, Bill," he said, brandishing the battered piece of parchment in front of him.

Bill gulped and stared at the hole again. A few seconds later, having rapidly made up his mind, he plunged his arm into the hole and pulled a face very much like Sirius had when chasing slugs in the sink.

"It's slimy in here guys!" Bill yelped.

He looked utterly disgusted then all of sudden, his expression changed to one of fear. The colour drained from his face and his eyes opened wide as he fought the urge to wrench his arm from the hole.

"There's something moving!" he said very slowly and the others stared from the hole to Bill in apprehension.

"Maybe this wasn't such a -" Mundungus began to say before he was interrupted by a pained yell from Bill.

"It bit me! Something bit me!"  
He had withdrawn his hand and was clutching at it as he held it out in front of him, staring in wide eyed horror at two small red marks above his wrist.

"I'm going to die!" he yelped as Sirius grabbed his arm and yanked it down so he could see it better. After a couple of seconds of cautious study, he looked up at Bill, a worried expression on his face making Sirius look as old as Remus thought he was. Tonks held her breath for Sirius' response.

"Bill," he said in a low voice and Bill gulped and stared at his arm. "I am afraid to say that you have been bitten by . . ."

"Yes! What?!" Bill said in a stricken voice. Sirius took a deep breath.

"You have been bitten by . . . by a sewage slug."

Bill gaped at him and then pulled his arm out of Sirius grasp angrily as Sirius doubled up with laughter.

"Completely non toxic you big sissy!" Sirius said, and Bill glared at him, rubbing the red spot on his arm which was already returning to its natural colour.

"I am not going anywhere near that thing again," he said as Sirius straightened up and clapped him on the shoulder, eyes still glimmering with mirth.

"What? Not even for twenty points?"

"Not on your bloody life," Bill replied resolutely.

Tonks had hoped to corner Remus before he went to bed that night, but by the time they were done calming Bill down and had gotten out of the basement, only to be confronted by Molly Weasley who now resembled a rather irate panda after finally applying the makeup that Bill had added a helping of wand polish too, she discovered that he had gone to sleep. Tonks had thought that Molly's angry yells and Bills pained yelps as he received a number of slaps to the back of the head would wake Remus, but clearly Mad-eye's map reading had worn him out.

She climbed the stairs wearily, feeling a little disappointed and wondering whether she might be able to get him on his own the next morning at breakfast. Not likely considering most of the Order, (except for those who were Hogwarts staff) would be turning up for a pre-work chat about possible death eater hide out locations.

As she scrambled into her pyjama's, (the ones that Remus seemed to like so much), she resigned herself to the fact that, no matter what, she would show Remus that that his note had not gone unappreciated.

A/N: Aww so cute!!! And there you have it folks! Here are the scores

1st: Sirius with 232 points

2nd: Tonks with 160 points

3rd: Bill with 157 points (2 for the slug!)

Last: Mundungus with 82 points


	12. Letter Day

A/N: Well looks like I lied. I am writing this from the back of my law class on the last day before exams. THIS will be the last chapter before Valentine's Day, at which point I hope to update With a Twist. G-V

"Good morning, Nymphadora!"

"Shut up Lupin! It's a horrible morning!" Tonks yelled before she had even opened her eyes. She distinctly heard the sound of him chuckling on the other side of the door and tried to burrow further down the bed to block out the sound, that at any other time of the day, (when she was slightly more conscious,) would have made her grin like a swooning school girl.

As it was, she did not block out any sound, but rather succeeded in waking herself up some more as she nearly tipped unceremoniously out of bed and onto the hard, dusty floor below. She could now, in fact, hear the sound of rain lashing the windows of her bedroom and a gale blowing through the house as the wind sought out the many drafts.

"It's a beautiful morning, Tonks," Remus replied cheerfully, though she detected a tired edge to his voice. Which was hardly surprising considering they had been up early for God knows how many mornings in a row now, though today it was due to an early Order meeting over breakfast, rather than Mundungus' unskilful attempts to gain points in the tournament;

Not that this small fact made Tonks any less tired or any more willing to get out of her nice, warm bed.

"Want me to go in there and get her?" she heard a gruff voice say, followed by another low chuckle from Lupin.

"No, that's quite alright Alistor," Remus replied, and Tonks, who had sat bolt upright at the sound of the grumpy Auror's voice, relaxed and snuggled back down under the duvet. "I can manage well enough on my own."

Tonks gave a snort of laughter that he must have heard as there was a sudden, insistent tapping at the door that made her groan and jam a pillow down over her ears.

"Good luck Remus! I'm not getting out of this bed for anyone!" she yelled and the tapping stopped. Tonks grinned triumphantly.

"Not even for me?" she heard him say, and her mind which was still in dream mode, began to conjure up images of Remus with a boyish, nervous grin on his face as he leant on the door waiting for her reply.

Tonks peeped out from under the pillow and at the unassuming scrap of parchment that was sat on the side table. Yes, she was quite willing to get out of her nice warm bed and face a grim, rain lashed morning inside Grimmauld place for Remus Lupin. But she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. Not just yet anyway.

"I am not moving from this bed, Lupin," she replied, and heard an exasperated and somewhat amused sigh from him. She could clearly imagine him running one hand through his hair and smiling at the door as he listened to her reply.

What Lupin was in fact doing, was considering that he really deserved a whole lot of a points, and a place on that score sheet, if he succeeded in the damn near impossible task of getting Tonks out of bed.

"What if I told you Molly had cooked a full English breakfast?" he suggested, not expecting much.

"I'd say I'm not hungry," Tonks replied, though her stomach chose that exact moment to give a loud grumble and she all but hissed at it to shut up.

Remus thought for a moment, head bowed as he leant against the door with one hand, the other thrust deep into his trouser pocket. If bribery was not a good tactic to use against an Auror, perhaps teasing was.

"You haven't gotten yourself tangled in your sheets and are just buying yourself time, have you?" he asked, and though he could not see it, he could almost feel the glare Tonks sent in his direction.  
"No!" she replied indignantly, thinking of the incident where she had nearly fallen out of bed and biting her lip. "You're not proving much help even if I had."

"I could always come in and rescue you," Remus suggested helpfully and Tonks gaped at the closed door, "Only if you're wearing those lovely pajamas again mind you," he added.

"What if I was?" she asked slowly, cautiously.

Lupin smiled and waited until Bill had stumbled sleepily down the stairs before he replied.

"Then I would most definitely feel obliged to come and rescue the fair maiden from the clutches of the fell beast that is her duvet."

Tonks cracked up laughing and rolled out of bed with a resigned sigh, very much wide awake now. She slipped her slippers on and grabbed a dressing gown from the back of the door, before opening it slowly and looking up at the smiling face of Remus Lupin.

"Good morning," he said, noting the pajamas under the dressing gown and smiling a little more. "You weren't lying about wearing them then."

Tonks shook her head and arched an eyebrow in what she hoped wasn't too suggestive an expression, before saying "Just for you."

A look of surprised flitted across his face briefly, before his features settled back into their usual mild form, and all that remained of the look was a slight twitch of the lips as he fought off a grin.

"I suppose I should have worn that shirt you stole from me then," he replied. Tonks assumed a thoughtful expression.

"It would have been more appropriate not to wear a shirt at all."

Remus chuckled and ran a hand through his hair self consciously and Tonks was pleased to see a slight blush rise in his cheeks.

"Thanks," she said quietly, "for the note."

Remus was all set with a reply when Sirius yelled up the stairs and interrupted the flow of conversation.

"When you two are quite done flirting, we've got a meeting to get on with down here!" he yelled.

Both of them blushed red and laughed nervously, unable to quite meet each other's eyes as they descended the stairs, entering the kitchen to chuckles and sly looks from the rest of the Order, all except for Molly who had her eyebrows raised and a worryingly thoughtful expression stamped across her face that made Tonks think of her own mother when she had first mentioned being friends with a boy in her class in her third year. It was extremely disconcerting.

"Right, now Miss early bird is here," Sirius said, and Mad-eye grumbled under his breath, (Tonks assumed the words "constant vigilance" were in there somewhere, though she could not hear over the sound of Mundungus slurping his tea,) "we can get this over and done with."

Remus pulled out a chair for Tonks and seated himself beside her as Kingsley began to read out a very long list of possible death eater hideouts situated around the country.

"We've got people within the Auror office keeping tabs on most of them, but I'll need to assign some of you to watch duty," he said, glancing up at the table and seeing a few people nod their heads and yawn widely in response. _Whose genius idea had it been to hold a meeting at seven in the morning? _

This thought was further compounded as an owl, leaning lopsidedly under the considerable weight of the many letters and papers it carried, swooped out of the chimney and struck Mundungus in the back of his head, causing him to spray tea over Emmeline Vance who was sat opposite him. He was only saved from a good hexing by Sirius leaping up to grab the post from the struggling bundle of feathers that was flapping weakly and spinning itself in circles on the kitchen floor.

"Daily prophet for Moony, Mad-Eye and Kingsley" he yelled, throwing the soggy newspapers across the table to the three of them. "Letter for Kingsley. You got a girlfriend mate? It's in a pink envelope!"

Kingsley looked up, a deep frown etched across his brow making him look very intimidating and Tonks had a sudden thought of just how terrifying he must be to criminals. He took the letter from Sirius and turned it over in his hands to look at the name on the front. The ink had run in the rain but the gold lettering still very clearly spelled out his name.

"Might be cursed Kingsley," Moody said sharply, eyeing the envelope in much the same way Tonks might a violent, blast ended skrewt. "Could be all sorts of poisons contained in it."

Sirius rolled his eyes at the old Auror and continued to hand out the post, chuckling as he discovered that another copy of _"which witch weekly"_ had come through addressed to Dumbledore. Tonks was about to suggest that Sirius forward it to the headmaster at Hogwarts, when she was interrupted by Kingsley who had opened up his copy of the Prophet.

"Bloody hell!" he yelped, a wide grin spreading across his face.

"What?" most of the table asked instantly.

Kingsley's deep, booming laugh echoed around the kitchen as his eyes roved quickly down a page, widening as he got further through the article in question.

"God how I wish I was at Hogwarts today!" he said, and then turned to Mundungus as the others glanced around at one another in confusion. "Impressive mate, impressive; I didn't know you felt that way!"

Sirius, Bill and Tonks gaped at Mundungus.

_He's actually done it!_ Tonks thought and a moment later Kingsley began reading a passage from the article and she was engulfed in a tide of laughter from the Order members and Mundungus had turned a stunning beetroot color from top to toe.

_"I 'as always liked an older woman and Minerva is certainly the oldest I know, not that she 'aint very pretty, prettier than whole vaults full o gold. She's right clever too, 'an I wanna tell the world 'ow much I love 'er . . ."_

Kingsley gave up reading as he was choking with laughter and merely shoved the paper into the centre of the table so that those without a copy could read the heartfelt (and surprisingly inventive), letter that Mundungus had written.

Phrases popped out at Tonks as she wiped tears of mirth from her eyes and leant on Remus arm for support, feeling his chest moving as he laughed beside her.

The pick of the bunch were _"Sweet Pussy cat," "Fairest of them all"_ and, Sirius' personal favorite it seemed as he read it out loud, still howling with laughter _"sexy glasses." _  
"Oh God, 'Dung, all the students are going to read this!" Tonks said.

"All of the staff will be reading this," Bill added.

"_Minerva_ is going to read this," Remus pointed out.

"_Everyone_ is going to read this!" Sirius said gleefully.

"Idiot," was all that Mad-Eye could manage to say as he glared at Mundungus.

The meeting, it seemed, was abandoned in favor of continuing to quote bits of the article at Mundungus who was looking more sick than when he ate the slug and was trying his hardest to slip away covertly from the table, which of course he was failing at miserably. Realizing that he was caught, Mundungus decided that diversionary tactics were in order.

"Oye Kingsley, you 'avn't opened your mystery letter yet," he said, waving the pink envelope in Kingsley's face. Kingsley grabbed it from Mundungus and with a quick glance in Moody's direction just in time to catch the disapproving glare, he tore it open and pulled out a piece of pastel pink parchment, gold, flowing script covering it.

Kingsley's eyes roved down the page, a frown creeping onto his brow, which quickly faded as a look of absolute glee took its place. He didn't hesitate for a moment before beginning to read aloud once more in his commanding voice.

_"My dearest, sweetest, most beautiful Fleur, how many hours has it been since we last saw one another? It feels like days, years even, since my eyes fell upon your beautiful face and I_ - HEY!"

Bill, as red faced as Mundungus, leapt across the table for the parchment, knocking a number of plates flying and depositing egg and beans in Sirius' lap in his haste to recover the letter. Kingsley waved it above Bill's head in a child like manner that Tonks would not have thought possible of him.

_"I long to be with you once again, your beauty is the light that guides me through these dark times!_ You mushy fool Bill! No woman is going to like this, not even Fleur!" Kingsley said, roaring with laughter along with the rest of the table, except for Molly who seemed to find the revelation that her son was interested in Fleur a little worrying.

"She liked the last one," Bill muttered as his final swipe caught the parchment and he stuffed in his pocket immediately.

"How on earth did the post office get that so spectacularly wrong?" Kingsley said, still laughing as Sirius flicked his wand and the beans in his lap splattered Bill in the side of the face. Bill didn't seem to notice them dripping down his face and into his robes as the others were still laughing uproariously at him.

"Oh, Dumbldore had the same trouble a few days ago," Remus said, glancing at Sirius as he said this. "Sirius here decided to accuse the post office of being drunkards."

"Completely true. And I would know, I worked there one summer," Sirius replied with a smile and Remus raised an eyebrow skeptically before deadpanning back.

"Yes that was probably what sent them all over the edge."

Most of the Order left for work a little while later, in considerably brighter spirits than they had been upon first waking. Tonks, who was working a night shift that evening for the ministry (observing suspected cauldron thieves who might be trying to sell them off in a muggle town named Glastonbury that was popular with wizards ), headed upstairs to take a shower and change into her Auror robes, leaving only Sirius and Remus alone in the kitchen.

"So . . ." Sirius said as he heard Tonks reach the top of the stairs, punctuated by the sounds of her stumbling and a stream of colorful swearwords. He gave Remus a significant look that was entirely ignored as Remus continued to drink his second mug of tea, the other hand holding the list that Kingsley had handed him.

"So," Sirius repeated a little louder, "were you?"

"Was I what?" Lupin said, eyes continuing to scan the list, knowing full well what Sirius was suggesting.

Sirius yanked the list from his mate's hands and stuffed it in his pocket. Remus looked up with an exasperated sigh.

"Sirius, you are being very childish -"

"And so are you," Sirius retorted, "You know exactly what I mean."  
Lupin finished his tea and sent the mug floating over to the sink where it was lost beneath a layer of thick, soapy bubbles. He folded his arms across his chest and leant back in his chair to stare blankly at Sirius.

"Were you flirting with her?" Sirius asked finally.

Remus continued to stare at Sirius, saying nothing at all, the ghost of a smile playing about his lips as he thought back to his earlier conversation with Tonks.

"Remus? Remus, are even listening to me?"

"Yes," he said and then clarified, "yes I am listening."

"Were you flirting with her?" Sirius said, and when Lupin didn't answer immediately he added, "If you stay silent I'll ask Tonks and she'll turn bright red and I'll know straight away."

Lupin chuckled slightly, unable to fight it off with the image of a blushing Tonks bursting into his mind. He ducked his head self-consciously, unable to meet Sirius' eyes as he answered.

"I don't think it was really what you would class as flirting, considering your distinct lack of subtlety," he said. "And anyway," Remus continued, confidence growing enough for him to meet Sirius' gaze and notice the smug grin on his friend's face, "it was for the good of the Order."

Sirius gave a barking laugh.

"Oh that's a good one Remus! First time I've ever heard you use such a lame excuse as that! For the good of the Order! Ha! How do you figure that one out?"

"Well, we needed her out of bed and down to the meeting -"

"So you thought you'd charm her out? It had nothing to do with the fact that you can't keep your eyes off her and that you have a complete lack of subtlety when it comes to hiding your feelings for her? I mean, you practically glowed when she nicked your shirt the other day."

"Perhaps I'm not trying to hide my feelings, Sirius," Lupin replied, twisting his hands nervously in his lap and wishing he had the mug back so he at least had something else to do with them other than making him yet more aware of how self-conscious he was and how transparent he could be sometimes.

"So you admit you like her then?" Sirius asked, far more seriously now as he stopped laughing at his mate.

"It would be rather hard not to like her."

"So what are you waiting for!" Sirius all but yelled at him.

"I'm not sure she really feels the same -"

"Oh come off it Moony, you saw how pleased she was when you told her you thought she had sexy hair!" Sirius laughed again at the memory but Remus did not.

Yes, she had seemed very pleased, but was that just because she had been getting points for that? Was she merely happy because she was completing her tasks and having a laugh at his expense in the process? Remus couldn't be sure about any of her reactions now after finding that score sheet.

He was thinking over how best to explain his misgivings to Sirius without giving away his knowledge of the tournament, when there was a yell of surprise from upstairs. Thinking Tonks might have fallen and done herself some real damage this time, both men leapt out of their seats and ran for the stairs.

They needed have worried however as Tonks emerged a moment later from the bathroom, wrapped, Remus noted as he fought off a rising wave of heat and the inevitable blushing, in only a towel. However, he was mercifully distracted from this for a moment by Tonks' hair and the surprised look on her face.

"Now I know you like strange colors Tonks', red, green, pink and all that but, at the same time?" Sirius said, laughing as she glared at him.

Tonks' hair had indeed received some Weasley rainbow hair dye treatment and was now in multicolored stripes that would occasionally switch around or change to darker and lighter variations like a Christmas tree decoration.

"I look like a bloody clown!" she yelled, stamping her foot and nearly slipping in the puddle that had formed around her legs as she dripped water onto the floorboards.

Remus felt his lips twitching upwards in a smile. He had discovered the rainbow hair dye that morning when he went for his shower and had avoided using it, hoping that Sirius might be the next to get in the shower. In the laughter over the two heartfelt declarations downstairs, he had completely forgotten about it.

"I think it rather suits you, Nymphadora" he said, allowing himself a small chuckle as she turned on her heel and marched back into the bathroom to find the bottle of conditioner that would reverse the effects.

A/N: Ok hope you all get some major laughs over this. And the scores stand thus:

1st: Sirius with 232 points

2nd: Bill with 177 points

3rd: Tonks with 160 points

Last: Mundungus with122 points


	13. A Distinct Lack of Subtlety

A/N: Hey everyone! I finally found my chapters for this story. Yes folks it is complete I just have to post it. So hopefully it won't take as long. Please read and review G-V

It was late at night and Tonks was stuck in a meeting following her stakeout in Glastonbury. She had already given her report and now found herself bored beyond belief as she counted the tiles on the ceiling, considered all the different ways to poison Snape, and ran every word she had spoken to Remus that day over and over in her mind, and yet none of these things seemed to help pass the time any quicker. However, they did help to distract her from her surroundings suitably.

"Auror Tonks!"

"Yes!" she squeaked, looking up at the Aurors sat around the table with her. Their eyes, which had previously been sweeping documents or staring at Scrimgrouer as he continued the meeting, were now fixed upon her.

"You appear to have a letter," Kingsley said very slowly, his face impassive as he suppressed a mounting wave of laughter and watched the paper aeroplane continue to jab her in the back of the head.

_That must have been some daydream for her not to notice,_ he thought as Tonks, blushing furiously, snatched the note out of the air and began to unfold it under the table as the meeting continued._ I shall have to remember to ask her what she was thinking about. _All daydreaming however, was driven screaming from Tonks' mind as she scanned the hastily scribbled note and she struggled not to let her eyes widen.

_Tonks! ___

_Get your arse back here as soon as you can! Bill's eating frogs legs with Fleur! He's going to throw up any minute now, it's fantastic! ___

_Your mate, Snuffles._

Tonks looked up quickly to see whether the portly, balding Auror on her right or the sallow faced and scarred young man on her left had noticed, however they were so intent upon Scrimgrouer as he continued with the meeting, (on the likelihood that Sirius Black was currently situated somewhere in Scotland, Tonks had struggled not to snort with laughter when he had first announced this), that they seemed to be paying her no attention what so ever. Tonks took the opportunity to cast a handy charm she had learned in school that made the ink run and the writing illegible, and then stuffed the parchment back in her pocket.

What on earth was Sirius thinking? Apart from possibly getting her fired for blatantly not paying attention to a senior Auror, he could get found out! Tonks made a mental note to yell at him when she got back to Grimmauld place about appropriate conduct and not bothering those people who had to actually get up and go to work.

However, as her irritation at (and concern for) Sirius dissipated, her thoughts quickly turned back to the tournament. So Bill was eating the frogs legs? Tonks doubted very much he would actually be able to hold them down, and whilst she didn't particularly want to watch him throw up, she was disappointed at missing an opportunity to join Sirius in ribbing Bill over the horrible letter that he had written for "Fleur." Although Kingsley was the intended target of the letter, Tonks wondered whether Bill, _curse breaking, long haired, fang earring wearing, Bill,_ really did write mushy love letters. It was a hard thing to imagine.

She was brought out of her reverie by a sharp elbow to the ribs and her head snapped up to look at the sallow faced Auror who was pointing to something hovering by her head. Tonks dared not look, but considering everyone was staring at her and patiently waiting for her to, she turned and glared at the memo beside her.

_At least this one isn't trying to stab me,_ she thought as she grabbed it and everyone turned their attention, (a little more unwillingly this time,) back to Scrimgrouer. She unfolded it, and rolled her eyes in disbelief.

_Come on Tonks, you can just slip away surely? __  
__Bill's eaten one and has turned green! He's not been sick yet, though I might be if Fleur continues talking to him in that soppy, disgusting way, it's enough to drive any man to drink. ___

_Talking of, get back here in time for some celebratory fire whiskey if he gets all three down, (it's not looking good right now, he's just staring at the second one and gagging). ___

_I'm sure a certain Professor would appreciate your company, he left the room a while ago when he realised what Bill was about to do, so if you don't fancy watching Bill hurl, Remus is upstairs, all alone, waiting . . ._

_your best matey, Snuffles._

Tonks screwed this note up and wondered which emotion was currently strongest and therefore what colour her hair might have turned. Anger at Sirius' utter stupidity as to send her messages whilst she was in the ministry, with the entire Auror office around her, glee at the thought of Bill struggling over his task, embarrassment at the comment about _"a certain Professor,"_ or a warm snuggly feeling that at once made her feel ridiculous and mildly drunk at the idea that he might actually be waiting for her company. They were all vying for position and Tonks had a horrible thought that her hair might have reverted to its earlier state after the rainbow hair dye treatment. She glanced over at Kingsley and then at the rest of the Aurors. They were still watching Scrimgrouer, so her hair was probably still pink.

She breathed a sigh of relief and stuffed the parchment in her pocket, again casting the ink running charm over it just in case one of the others happened to get hold of it. The code name might not be enough to give Sirius away, but the fact that she was receiving cryptic messages about Professors and eating frogs legs was probably enough for her to earn some very awkward questions. At least Moody would be proud of the precautions she was taking.

She forced her mind back onto the task at hand and hastily scribbled some notes as Scrimgrouer continued his report, now resorting to the use of a flip chart to show various moving diagrams of ways in which Sirius might have concealed himself whilst in Scotland. She couldn't help but feel this was all ridiculous when she new full well that Sirius Black was currently sat in a draughty kitchen in London, most likely with a bottle of firewhiskey and laughing his head off at Bill Weasley.

"Auror Tonks," the exasperated voice of Scrimgrouer said and Tonks groaned. "I don't know who seems to insist upon sending you messages whilst you are in a meeting, but it had better be important!"

"It is," Tonks said feebly, hoping this wouldn't be a repeat of potions class where she had been forced by Snape to read a note that had been handed to her, (by the captain of the Hufflepuff quidditch team no less) aloud in front of the whole class.

The note floated down onto the desk in front of her and all Tonks could manage to think this time was thank God Sirius had just enough sense not to send her a howler.

_Tonks you idiot, you missed the show! ___

_He ate two! Then he threw up quite spectacularly! Fleur's flounced off and Remus is helping Bill out, found some hangover cure for him, very good for settling the stomach he said. ___

_Anyhow, Bill's got half points, seemed a bit harsh not to give him any you know, and we're having that firewhiskey, SO GET BACK HERE NOW! By the way, did you know that the ministry blocks Howlers? Weird huh? ___

_your matey, Snuffles _  
_P.S. Remus wants to know when you get off shift. Well, he didn't exactly say it like that, but he's been dropping hints._

Tonks would have yelled in frustration if that wouldn't have raised some very, very awkward questions. Sirius, it appeared, did not posses even a modicum of restraint, nor of common sense. He actually tried to send a howler?  
Tonks, clutching at straws now, decided that the only way she was going to get rid of Sirius, (who as one of the designers of the marauder's map, probably would be able to find a way past the ministry blocks on howlers), was to actually reply to his message.

She grabbed the piece of parchment she had been making notes on sporadically throughout the meeting and tore a piece off the bottom, quickly scribbling her reply on it.

_Snuffles, ___

_If you stop interrupting the meeting then I'll be able to get away sooner. I'll be back in time for our meeting, you lot better make it worth my while coming. ___

_Your hard working mate, Tonks ___

_P.S. Laugh at Bill for me._

She folded the note into a neat paper aeroplane, muttered the destination to it and then sent it on its way. Tonks watched dreamily as it zoomed away from her and out of the door into the crowded hallway where it jostled for space with other notes and memos.

One hour, two more notes from Sirius, (the first reading, _The Professor will make it worth your while,_ and the second, _Snape's going to be there!)_ and three angry looks from Scrimgrouer later, and Tonks had apparated onto the top step of Grimmauld place.

She stepped inside and shrugged off her coat, somehow avoiding the troll's foot umbrella stand as she made her way to the kitchen where the Order meeting would be taking place. When she stepped into the kitchen it was to a decidedly odd scene.

Sirius, for once, was not sat at the table nursing bottle of firewhiskey and a headache; in fact, he wasn't in the kitchen at all. Instead, Remus was sat at one end of the table and smiling at her, and at the other was sat Snape, arms folded across his chest as he tried desperately to ignore Remus, Mundungus, Bill (who was still looking a bit green around the gills) and the few other Order members in the room.

Tonks grinned back at Remus as he rose from his seat to draw out a chair for her and then shifted her gaze onto Snape who had now turned his back on everyone and seemed to be scrutinizing a damp patch on the wall.

"Sirius has been winding him up," Remus said as he noted her eyes leave contact with his own. "He decided to tell Snape, in a fit of hysterics I might add, that he had always admired his greasy hair and beak of a nose greatly and would he autograph this for him. Sirius then saw fit to hand Severus the dart board."

"Oh," Tonks said in a sheepish voice, sniggering helplessly as she imagined the look of sheer rage upon Snape's face. Remus chuckled as he returned to his seat beside her and glanced over in Snape's direction.

"Yes, as you can surely imagine, Severus was not best pleased."

Snape's head twitched momentarily in their direction and Tonks was sure that he was listening in to their conversation, not that she was particularly bothered.

"So, where is Sirius? I thought you lot would have the meeting under way by now?"

Remus had opened his mouth to reply when the door burst open and Sirius stepped into the room, beaming around at everyone once, before leaping on top of the table so close to Tonks that she tipped backwards in her chair to avoid him and Remus had to catch the back of it to stop her falling.  
"I am the fairest of them all!" Sirius yelled, twirling on the spot so that Dumbledore's purple robes, (which were rather too big for Sirius), billowed around him. A half empty bottle of fire whiskey was clutched in one hand; clearly Sirius had needed some liquid courage for this task.

"You there!" Sirius yelled as he stopped twirling and jabbed his wand in Bill's direction and demanded, "Who is the fairest of them all?"

"Err . . ." Bill looked completely lost as he glanced over at Tonks who merely shrugged and grinned at him. "Err, you are?"

"Correct!" Sirius roared, making Hestia Jones jump with fright. He turned on Snape now, grinning manically. "You, slimy! Yes that's right, you!"

Snape glowered at Sirius, unable to come up with a suitable insult in the face of Sirius' overwhelming confidence.

"Go wash your greasy hair, you are not fit to be in the presence of one as stunningly handsome as me!"

"Oh Merlin, Sirius," Remus muttered, hands pressed to his forehead, shoulders shaking with laughter. "Get down off the table you fool."

Sirius whirled around to face Remus and jabbed his wand in Lupin's direction, gold stars shooting out of the end and falling upon the table at his feet.

"You dare question my status as fairest of them all?" Sirius said, fixing a comical frown upon his brow. Remus rolled his eyes.

"No Sirius, how could I ever think of doing that?"

Sirius looked incredibly smug for a moment then jumped down off the table. "I declare this meeting in session!" he yelled and flopped down in a chair, the robes touching the floor as he took a very large gulp of whiskey.

The meeting ended abruptly when Moody arrived, took one look at Sirius and yelled something about not taking a war seriously. Sirius took this as a challenge and sent a well placed hex in Mad-Eye's direction, which left the grizzled Auror with his hair smoking and a look of rage, which even Snape would have struggled to match stamped across his scarred features. Mad-Eye had returned the gesture with an equally interesting spell that sent Sirius toppling from his chair and then a full scale duel had broken out. This had resulted in Mundungus hiding under the table, Kingsley and Tonks trying to placate an irate Moody who could have quite gladly killed Sirius at that point, and Remus dragging a struggling Sirius away from the fray. Sirius took this as a useful opportunity to wildly cast a spell at Snape, who had promptly found his robes on fire and his eyebrows suddenly growing at an alarming rate.

"More points! More points!" Sirius had yelled, slurring his words as Moody stormed from the room, hastily followed by Snape, (eyebrows now past his knees), Emmeline Vance and Hestia Jones. Remus didn't say anything at these words and luckily for Bill, Tonks and Mundungus, the rest of the Order merely assumed that Sirius was drunk and raving.

Once Sirius had sobered up and had headed off to bed, (still wearing Dumbledore's robes), Tonks, Remus, Bill, Mundungus and Kingsley were left behind to clear up the wreckage in the kitchen. They had worked in a silence that Tonks found hard to bear, but there really was no rational explanation for what had happened. She resolved to talk to Sirius in the morning and discus calling off the dueling group task, in the current icy atmosphere of the Order, it was definitely not safe.

"Goodnight everyone," Remus said wearily as they all traipsed up the stairs.

Kingsley, Bill and Mundungus threw grunts over their shoulders in reply as they slouched off to bed looking dejected and more than a little confused. Tonks turned to Remus as he pushed open his bedroom door.

"Sorry, about earlier, Remus," she said and he looked up in confusion.

"It's hardly your fault if Sirius decides to drink himself silly, or if Mad-Eye continues to be a little over zealous in his constant vigilance, Nymphadora," he said, giving her a weak smile.

Tonks bit her bottom lip as she considered that because she had come up with the idea for the tournament with Sirius, it _was_ partly her fault. Remus continued to smile at her as she showed no signs of heading off to her own room just yet.

"All the same, sorry. It sort of ruined the evening didn't it?"

"It was an Order meeting, it wasn't the highlight of my day. Although seeing Snape fighting off his lengthening eyebrows came close." Remus chuckled and Tonks felt a little bolder as the mood lightened.

"Oh?" she said, raising her eyebrows. "What was the highlight then?"

A curious expression crossed Remus' face, as if he couldn't make his mind up what to say, or rather, what was appropriate to say. He seemed to come to some sort of conclusion and his gaze dropped as he said the words very quietly.

"Seeing you, of course."

Then he turned and headed, blushing slightly, into his bedroom, leaving Tonks to stand in the hallway with a grin and a look of happy shock on her face.

There was a shrill, piercing whistling followed by a roar of rage in the darkness and Tonks sat bolt upright in bed, the sheets twisted around her as she snatched up her wand and looked around in bleary eyed confusion. Another sudden yell made her jump out of bed and sprint for the corridor, where she ran into Remus who caught her around the arm as she fell backwards and didn't remove his hand from its protective position as they both glanced at each other with concern.

"What in the hell is going on?"

They both looked up as Sirius, dressed in a t-shirt emblazoned with the words, _"My wand is bigger than yours,"_ and a pair of shorts, emerged in the hallway, white faced and worried.

"I don't know -" Tonks began when there was a sudden yelp and another roar cut through the air.

All three of them looked at each other for a second before saying, "Mundungus," in unison and diving into Moody's room from where the racket was issuing.

"Never, ever, ever, come, near, me, again, scum!" Moody was yelling, each word punctuated by a squeak as a ferret was bounced off the ceiling, walls and floor. In the background a number of small round objects were spinning very fast and emitting a high pitched wailing. Apparently Mundungus' night time wandering had set off the sneak-o-scopes.

"Alistor, Alistor!" Remus said, letting go of Tonks so he could step up to Mad-Eye and attempt to calm him down. Sirius gave a nervous gulp and winced as the ferret ricocheted off the wardrobe in the corner of the room and landed on the bed panting.

"Scum was trying to steal my eye!" Moody roared, jabbing a finger at the table beside his bed, upon which Tonks could now see was a glass of water and floating inside of this was Mad-Eye's electric blue eye. It was quivering and fixed upon the ferret/Mundungus.

"Alistor, could you please turn Mundungus back?" Remus asked wearily, running a hand through his greying hair that was tousled from sleep.

Moody grumbled but after another glare in the ferret's direction, there was a loud pop and it transformed back into Mundungus who was groaning and clutching at his face where two spectacular black eye's were blossoming. He rolled over, still moaning and promptly fell off the bed with a loud bang.

"Can we all get some sleep now?" Remus asked desperately.

A/N: The scores stand thus:

1st : Sirius with 272 points

2nd : Bill with 187 points

3rd: Tonks with 160

Last: Mundungus with 122


	14. Cold Showers

A/N: Wow! Two in one Night! Enjoy G-V

Remus wasn't there when Tonks finally descended the stairs and headed into the kitchen at Grimmauld place for breakfast. Sirius was however.

"Morning, Sirius," she said around wide yawn, flopping down in a chair opposite him and lazily summoning over the breakfast things. Sirius gave her a grunt in reply and she looked up with a slight smile. "There's hangover potion in the cupboard above the sink," she said and Sirius scraped back his chair and hurried over to the aforementioned cupboard, muttering a word of thanks.

He sat down again a moment later and knocked back the potion with the same speed he did fire whiskey and then gave a contented sigh as it began to work its magic.

"Where is everyone?" Tonks tried to ask in an offhand voice. Sirius was not fooled and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Lover boy is still in bed," he replied and lazily blocked the cereal that Tonks flicked at him.

"I said everyone, not Remus."

Sirius shrugged and threw some of the cereal back at Tonks, striking her on the nose with a few choice shots.

"Let me see." He began counting people off on his fingers. "Arthur is at work, as is Kingsley. Molly is at the Burrow, Mundungus has disappeared to a pub to lick his wounds, Mad-Eye probably followed him there for round two of ferret bouncing, Snape is still trimming his eyebrows and shouting abuse at a potions class in Hogwarts, Bill disappeared off to see Fleur and the others are quite possibly too scared to set foot in this house ever again."

He finished with a satisfied look on his face as if all his worldly ambitions had been achieved in one fell swoop somehow during last night's mess.

"So, how did Remus take last night's erm . . ." Sirius struggled to find the correct word and Tonks chipped in quickly.

"Fiasco?"

Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment then nodded agreement.

"That probably covers it nicely, yeah. So, how did he take it?"

"Considering it's nearly nine o'clock and he isn't out of bed yet, I'm going with, not very well," Tonks replied in a far more accusatory tone than she had first intended. Sirius didn't look in the least bit bothered however and merely grinned at her.

"You do like him, don't you Tonks?"

She glared at him, then realised that whilst he might be smiling, he wasn't actually laughing, and nodded.

"Yeah. It's a little bit more than like, Sirius," she replied and he looked triumphant, as well as a little bit smug.

"Well, you know there are two sure fire ways to a man's heart, not that you need much help with the man in question," he added. "They are, humour and food."

Tonks raised an eyebrow and said, "If by that you mean letting him laugh at my appalling culinary skills, then you can forget it cousin."

"No, no, no! I mean, make the stupid, thick headed werewolf up there breakfast in bed and then complete that task

'Dung set for you!"

Tonks frowned and pulled out the piece of parchment with her tasks on it, scanning them until she found the one Sirius might mean. She frowned further and looked up at Sirius as if he was really as crazy as those Azkaban mug shots suggested.

"Sirius? How on earth is growing a moustache going to increase my chances of getting Remus to go out with me?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and flicked his wand at the stove to turn up the heat.

"Tonks, he'll probably think you've been attacked by something from mum's makeup collection and rush to your rescue. It's perfect!"

"It's bloody stupid if you ask me," she muttered, rising from her chair and heading over to the stove.

Half an hour later though, Tonks found herself walking very slowly and carefully up the stairs with a tray balanced on one arm bearing a cooked breakfast, a mug of tea and more toast than any one man could possibly eat.

She reached out one hand and tapped twice on Lupin's door, listening out for any sounds of reply. There was a second within which she heard bed sheets rustling and then a hoarse and sleepy voice called out.

"Yes? Who is it?"

Tonks bit her lip to stop from laughing. She was so used to hearing him alert and awake, not sleepy and a little lost and confused sounding. There was a moment in which a stray thought flitted through her mind that made her stomach lurch and her head spin, that this is what he would sound like every morning if she were to one day be able to wake up beside him. She banished this instantly, as she very nearly dropped the carefully prepared breakfast, and replied to his question.

"It's me Remus. I brought you some breakfast."

The moment of silence this time was heavy with anticipation as Remus fought off a feeling of utter surprise and revelled in the warm glow that had filled his heart at those simple words.

"Come on in," he said, and attempted to tidy his hair, messy from sleep.

Tonks nudged the door open with her foot and cautiously edged into the room, looking up at Remus and smiling. He was sat up in bed in his pyjamas, hair tousled, one hand running through it as he smiled at her with heavy eyes and yawned.

"I thought you could do with a bit of looking after, considering last night," she said quickly. That stray thought was worryingly close to squirming back into her mind as she fought off a smile at the look of gratitude upon his face.

"I . . . Tonks, you didn't have to -"

"Yeah but I wanted to. And, I didn't burn anything!" she said proudly, stepping forward, slowly still, and into the light so she could set the tray down upon his bedside table.

"Well, thank you very much . . ." Lupin trailed off as she came into view properly and then his grin turned into an expression of mild embarrassment. Tonks gave him a look of mock confusion as she set the food down and handed him a cup of tea.

"Erm, Tonks," he began and then faltered as he stared up at her face, seemingly suppressing a grin.  
"Anything wrong, Remus?" Tonks asked innocently. "Too much sugar in your tea?"

"No!" he said quickly. "No, no, it's perfect, just how I like it. I . . . erm, it's just that."

He eyed her cautiously as his sleep addled mind caught up with him and reminded him of that score sheet he had found.

"It's just that you appear to have grown a moustache," he managed to say finally.

"Oh that!" Tonks said as if it were nothing more than another change to her hair colour. "Oh yeah, just trying out a new disguise for work."

"As a man, or as a very confused teenager perhaps?" Remus asked, frowning. Tonks laughed and sighed heavily.

"It's just something the other Auror's suggested as there aren't any male metamormaphagus' around."

"I see," Remus replied, smiling again now.

"I give up, I can't put up with this all day." She screwed up her face and the moustache disappeared, her features returned to the normal ones that Remus had come to know so well and love so much. "How do you cope with this thing?" she added, smiling at him.

"I've never found it much of a problem," Remus replied with a smile as he took a bite of toast and found that Tonks was correct when she said nothing was burnt. He was very impressed and knew just how much effort she must have put into making this. She was currently perched on the edge of his bed and watching him nervously as he ate. "It's all perfect. I can't thank you enough," he said reassuringly, taking another bite and watching the grin spread across her face.

"Excellent! I thought I might have overdone it maybe with the toast, and maybe the tea wasn't the way you like it and -"

Remus cut her off by placing his free hand upon hers and she looked up.

"It's perfect, Tonks, really."

She nodded and held his gaze with the same fervour that he held her hand. For a long while he seemed completely lost within the moment, and then with great effort he smiled again and drew his hand away to place the tea back on the side. Tonks looked away and glanced around the room.

"I better go, I need to have shower and get ready for work," she mumbled, standing up and crossing the floor. "Enjoy your breakfast," she said and Remus thanked her again for her gesture as she slipped out of the room. Sirius was leaning against the wall and grinning as she stepped into the hallway. He quickly manoeuvred her away from the door and out of earshot before launching into his questioning.

"So, how did it go? Has he declared his undying love for you yet? Did he try to snog you and get cold feet? Did you try to snog him? Did -"

Tonks scowled at him and tried to edge toward the bathroom; she really needed to get ready for work.

"No, but he said thank you a lot and looked sort of -"

"- lost as if he couldn't understand why anyone was being nice to him? Yeah, that sounds like good old Moony," Sirius said with a mock wistful sigh and a grin. "You've got to be a bit clearer with the guy."

"What?"

"You've got to make it a bit more obvious that you fancy him and would really quite like to -"

"Shut it Sirius!" Tonks hissed and he backed up a pace, glancing at the wand tucked into her belt. "Considering your comments, it's got to be just about as obvious as it can get that I like him"

Sirius shook his head and moved out of her way so she could head to the bathroom.

"Not for Moony, he just doesn't get that people might actually like him. You've got to do something drastic Tonks. Something involving the shower, perhaps?" he said innocently. Tonks glared at him again.

"Sirius, I think the poor bloke has had enough pranks played on him recently without me heaping another task upon him this morning."

"It's your call," Sirius said as he turned to leave. "But I think he would really rather enjoy it."

Tonks pondered his words as she stepped into the shower and turned the water on. Maybe Sirius was right, maybe this really would be a good way to . . . She shook her head and sighed. No, this would not be a good way of getting it across to him that she liked him, in fact all would do was embarrass her and get him very wet. It might be quite funny though, and Sirius had said humour was the best way to a man's heart . . .

She stepped out of the shower quickly and wrapped a towel around herself, ignoring the water dripping off her and onto the floor as she charmed the shower to stop working. Tonks grinned as she opened the door and padded across the hallway, stopping outside of Remus' door and knocking once quickly.

"Remus?" she called out. "I need some help."

The word "help" brought an immediate response from him and the door was opened quickly.

Remus' eyes widened slightly and then darted to look everywhere except at her. Tonks tried her absolute hardest not smile and considered any other man in his position would probably just gawk at her. He really was a gentleman, which made her feel slightly guilty for what she was about to do. Only very slightly, mind you.

"Erm, yes? Help?" Remus said, eyes now fixed on a point just over her shoulder.

"Yeah, the shower's stopped working and well, you know what Sirius is like with these things. So I just wondered if you could give me a hand?"

"Yes, yes, of course, erm . . ." Remus stepped out of his room, still in his pyjamas and followed her back across the hallway. "What seems to be the problem?"

Tonks grinned at him over her shoulder as she opened the door to the bathroom and he passed through with a slightly strained smile to her.

"I don't know. One moment the water was nice and warm and then, the whole thing just shut off. I thought maybe Sirius was playing a joke on me, but he's in his room and Kreacher is hiding under the sink, so it can't be anything to do with him either."

Remus nodded as he inspected the shower from a distance and Tonks watched him carefully.

_At least he's not already properly dressed,_ she thought, grinning at him as he stepped into the cubicle, bare feet sloshing through the water that had collected in the base, and began to fiddle with the shower head, frowning at it.

"I can't see anything really wrong with it," he said, glancing at Tonks and then looking back immediately.

"Oh?" Tonks said, in the most interested voice she could muster. "By the way, are those new pyjamas, Remus?"

He looked up in confusion and then down at the pyjamas he was wearing which were a faded grey, a little worn in places and very clearly not new.

"No, no, I've had them for a while now," Remus said slowly, watching as Tonks gave him a slightly shy look.

"Only, I hadn't noticed you wear them before. They make you look very . . . handsome."

A number of things happened at once. Firstly, Remus blushed red and looked very pleased, secondly, the shower burst into life and he was instantly doused in cold water which produced and expression of shocked confusion, and thirdly, Tonks was struck by the sudden realisation that whilst the words had been meant merely to start the shower off and complete her task, she really did mean them and felt horrible for getting him all wet, which produced much the same expression upon her own features as was currently gracing Remus'.

"What on earth . . . !" Remus spluttered as the flow of water suddenly trickled to a stop and he was left dripping wet in the shower, pyjamas clinging to him as Tonks looked at him in horror. Then he began to laugh.

"You see what happens when I'm distracted?" he said, still laughing loudly, shoulders shaking as he swept back his sopping hair from his forehead.

Tonks grinned at him and suddenly found herself laughing along with him as he continued to drip water.

"I'm surprised a small compliment managed to produce such an effect in calm, composed Professor Lupin," she joked and he laughed even more.

"Calm and composed? I suspect I look something like a bedraggled rat currently," he replied with a smile. Tonks shook her head furiously.

"Of course you don't, you still look very handsome. More so, actually."

Remus ducked his head and his wet fringe fell back into place as he continued to chuckle quietly. Tonks took a step closer, unsure as to what part of her brain was actually controlling this sudden movement, but going with it anyway. He looked up at her through the wet strands of hair.

"I believe," he said quietly, "that the shower may be fixed."

Tonks sniggered helplessly and then fell about laughing again, Lupin joining her in fresh peals of mirth. She found herself leaning on him for support as she shook with laughter and could feel the wet fabric of his pyjama shirt pressing against her skin. His laughter subsiding he looked down at her leant against him, one of his hands resting on the towel against her back.

"I, umm, suppose you'll want to finish your shower now," he said, still smiling but slightly uncertainly now.

"Yeah, I . . . I guess I'd better get ready for work," Tonks replied, her voice heavy with regret. She reached up with one hand and pushed the wet fringe back from Remus face so she could see him better. He bore the same look of regret upon his own face and she hoped that this was because she would have to leave soon, not because he hadn't understood exactly what she felt. Perhaps Sirius was right, perhaps he really didn't understand that she liked him, that she loved him.

_I love him,_ Tonks thought suddenly, and the shock of this revelation must have shown in her eyes because he looked instantly worried, as if he thought he might have done something wrong. He caught her hand as she went to withdraw it from him face, looking into her eyes with confusion.

"Tonks, are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. I'm . . ."

But she wasn't at all sure what to say now, now that she had been suddenly made so aware of just how deep her feelings went. She just smiled at him and nodded finally and it must have been enough because the furrows of concern fell away from his face and a look of relief passed across it.

"I'd better let you get ready for work, and well, I need to dry off," he said with a smile as he drew her hand away from his face and held it at her side.

"Thanks, Remus, for erm, fixing the shower," she replied with a grin.

"And thank you for breakfast," Remus said.

There was another moment of silence, not awkward this time, but heavy with expectation. Remus smiled again, a real smile that filled his eyes and lit up his face, before leaning down and placing a small kiss on her forehead.

"Have a nice day at work," he said, before releasing her hand stepping out of the shower, trailing water from his soggy pyjamas across the floor as he left the bathroom.

A/N: YAY! Fluff! And here are the scores

1st : Sirius with 272

2nd: Tonks with 210

3rd: Bill with 187

Last: Mundungus with 122


	15. Laughter is the Best Medicine

Tonks rose from her desk the second that the clock beside the stack of papers informed her that it was lunchtime and she was free to go to the canteen and join the lunch queue if she so wished. However, this was not Tonks intention. She had spent all morning deliberating over how best to explain to Remus how exactly she felt and replaying the events before work over and over again. She had even considered whether she could do it by letter to perhaps save herself the embarrassment of tripping over her own words, but she decided this was too impersonal for so important a message.

So she all but sprinted down the corridor, avoiding carefully the other Aurors and swerving around a cleaning lady who muttered something under her breath about certain employees thinking they were better than others. Tonks ignored this as she raced to the lift and stepped inside, bouncing up and down irritably as she waited for it to stop at her floor. When the doors finally opened to reveal the entrance hall of the ministry, she all but ran to the apparation point, spinning on the spot with such force she nearly lost the bag that had quickly been slung over one shoulder.

With a crack she appeared on the top step of Grimmauld place, holding her breath, suddenly unsure what she was doing and why she had thought that this was really a good idea. Ignoring these thoughts, Tonks steeled herself with some of the Auror courage that she possessed and pushed the door open.

"Oh hey Tonks! You don't normally come back for lunch."

Tonks looked up as she disentangled herself from that damned umbrella stand and into the grinning face of Sirius Black. She took a moment to register the very odd scene in front of her before she could respond.

"Erm, Sirius, what are you doing to Bill?"

"Safety precaution," Sirius said as he concentrated on strapping pillows to the side of Bill's head. He was already covered from head to foot in cushions that made it almost impossible for him to move.

"Safety precaution for what?" she asked, dropping her bag at her feet and striding across the hallway to the two of them.

Sirius gave Bill a forceful pat on the head which Bill clearly could not feel through the padding and then turned to Tonks.

"For Bill's task obviously. Buckbeak is not going to be happy at carrying a passenger around this house three times now is he? And Bill certainly won't be used to flying in this manner. Better to be safe than sorry right?" he said with a grin.

Tonks walked a circle around Bill, inspecting his covering of cushions with a critical eye.

"Surely you could have just used a cushioning spell?" she said in confusion.

"You remember that charm we put on the stairs to make them feel soft in case Kreacher actually succeeded in tripping anyone?" Bill said and Tonks nodded as she came to a stop in front of his face again. "Well it doesn't work. It seems the house is fighting back against us. So we figured magic probably won't work on this either and it was safer to do things the old fashioned way."

Tonks shrugged, seeing the sense in the argument and making a mental note to be extremely cautious the next time she spied Kreacher lurking anywhere near the stairs. Her mind however quickly returned to its main concern; that of finding Remus.

"Err, Sirius?" she said and he looked up as he finished layering Bill up with cushions. "You wouldn't happen to know where Remus is would you?"

The look on Sirius' face was one of genuine apology as he straightened up and answered her.

"I'm afraid he got a message from Dumbledore, something about checking out one of those possible death eater hideouts Kingsley mentioned the other day. Anyway, he left about half an hour after you did, no idea when he'll be back. Could be tomorrow evening for all I know."

Tonks felt the heavy weight of disappointment drop like a leaden weight inside her. It crushed all the hope and excitement she had felt that morning as she waited for the opportunity to get back to Grimmauld place and see Remus. Something of her dejected state of mind must have reflected in her expression because Sirius rested a hand on her shoulder and gave her what was clearly supposed to be an uplifting smile.

"You'll see him soon enough, Tonks. He seemed equally disappointed about having to go."

"Really?"

Tonks looked up at Sirius, searching his face, but he seemed to be telling her the truth as he nodded.

"In the meantime," he said with a conspiratorial wink that really did make Tonks grin. "We can get on with lots of tasks without risking winding Remus up."

"Very true," Tonks said seriously and then laughed as Bill nearly fell over as he attempted to walk towards the stairs in his padding.

It took them a long time and a lot of effort to get him up the stairs, but  
they managed it eventually and soon had Buckbeak ready and waiting. It was almost as difficult to get Bill on as Buckbeak did not seem to want to bow to him, but eventually he did and Bill could safely mount the Hippogriff.

"Right, don't grip his feathers too hard mate otherwise he'll just throw you off. I found that out the hard way as we were flying over Loch Ness last year," Sirius said, giving Bill a reassuring smile that was not returned.

"Three times around, Bill," Tonks said. "And good luck."

Bill gulped and Sirius gave Buckbeak a hard pat on the back that made the Hippogriff screech and then launch himself into the air very quickly. Bill gave a cry of surprise as he lurched forwards suddenly, gripping with his knees and flailing his arms madly as he tried to balance. Buckbeak did not give him any time to adjust however as he careened to the right and raced around the top floor.

"Hold on tight!" Sirius yelled with glee as he watched Bill get his grip just as Buckbeak sped past them and then dove over the stairs and down into the hallway, knocking over various objects on his way. Bill's padding proved effective as his head struck a chandelier, the force of it nearly knocking him sideways off of the Hippogriff's back, but somehow he remained upright.

Many of the paintings were screaming with fright as Bill whirled around the bottom floor. Clearly expecting a repeat of the other day, they were ducking and covering their faces in case a quaffle suddenly hurtled towards them. Even if Bill had wanted to throw something, he was having so much trouble staying on he would most likely have fallen if he'd tried to take aim.

On the second lap, he was bounced off two walls and a number of paintings fell to the floor much to Sirius' obvious delight.

"I'm starting to realise how Mundungus must feel when Moody turns him into a ferret," Bill shouted and then yelled in surprise as Buckbeak dove once more over the stairs and began his sweep of downstairs, this time flying Bill into the library where he suddenly found that the shelves were pelting him with books. He let go of Buckbeak to cover his face as the books bounced off of him and found himself slipping sideways precariously.

"Bill hang on tight!" Tonks yelled as she and Sirius skidded around the corner and into the room, throwing up shield charms to fend off the attacking books. One copy of "Dark Arts through the ages" was particularly intent upon trying to murder Sirius and kept repeatedly hurling itself at the protective barrier around his head. Sirius chuckled and sent a charm at it, its pages instantly burst into flame, crumpled up and turned to ashes upon the floor.

There was no time to consider this sudden counter offensive by the house against the three trouble makers however as Bill was swept from the room and Tonks and Sirius ran after him as he did another pass of the ground floor before Buckbeak swept him upstairs again for his final lap.

"Come on Bill you can do it!" Tonks shouted as Bill let out another yell of fright and quickly ducked under a doorway. He re-emerged moments later with Molly's makeup attacking him from all sides leaving dark smudges of lipstick along the cushions.

Buckbeak pelted towards the stairs as an insistent stick of mascara very nearly shot up Bill's left nostril and the shock of it tipped him off balance. There was a second where he flailed in the air, arms windmill as he tried to catch his balance, and then he toppled sideways, fell over the banisters and landing on his side at Sirius' feet.

"Well, that was unexpected," Sirius said, helping a groaning Bill to his feet as Tonks raced up the stairs to catch Buckbeak and send the attacking makeup back into Molly's room. "You alright matey? Did that padding do the job?"

Bill nodded weakly as he began un-strapping the pillows from around his body, wincing slightly.

"Nothing broken, just some impressive bruises," he muttered. Tonks appeared at his side wiping sweat from her brow as she grinned at Sirius.

"Buckbeak put up a bit of a struggle when I tried to get him back into his room," she said in reply to her cousin's inquisitively raised eyebrow. "How you doing Bill?"

He gave a grunt in reply and the two of them laughed as they helped him out of his padding.

Tonks ate a quick lunch at Grimmauld place, during which Bill managed to somehow drink a glassful of the almost toxic sink water that had turned a nice green colour since Remus wasn't around to moan at Sirius to wash up. He commented that it tasted something like a dodgy bottle of butterbeer he had drunk once at Hogwarts, but didn't seem to mind all that much. All the same, Tonks and Sirius declined from trying it for themselves.

She excused herself soon after that and headed back to the Auror office to more than likely brood on her feelings rather than actually get any work done. Sirius had tried to cheer her before she left by informing her that Snape had been ordered to attend that evening's meeting after telling Dumbledore he didn't wish to go, and that Sirius now had some very interesting things planned for the great over grown bat.

Kingsley commented that afternoon that she seemed rather distracted and even Moody, who wasn't the best at sensing emotions other than treachery within a person said he thought she wasn't her usual chipper self and that this wasn't good for her vigilance. Tonks had failed to return this with a sarcastic remark and had instead shrugged rather meekly and returned to her desk, leaving Mad-Eye looking utterly perplexed.

When work ended and she apparated to Grimmauld place for the second time that day, she was so caught up in wondering where Remus was and what he might be up to right now, that she very nearly tripped up McGonagall, Dumbledore and Snape who had all apparated to the same spot as her.

"Sorry Professors, didn't see you there," Tonks said, dusting herself off and looking at the three of them apologetically. Dumbledore smiled at her but Snape was shooting her a look that would have reduced most Hogwarts students to a quivering wreck.

"Not to worry Nymph- sorry, Tonks," Dumbledore said with a smile and Tonks' cheeks glowed red as she remembered why he was now cautious to use her preferred name. His eyes twinkled however as he stood aside so she could enter the house first.

"Thanks," Tonks said as she skirted around the umbrella stand and turned to see the other three following her in. "I was wondering if you knew when Remus might be back? Sirius said that -"

Tonks' words were cut off however by Sirius himself, in his great, loping dog form, bounding across the hallway very fast, tongue hanging out and what was unmistakably a grin plastered to his face. He launched himself at Snape, knocking the potions master flat upon his back, before planting a sloppy wet lick right across his face.

"Get off me you mangy, flea bitten, good for nothing Black!" Snape yelled in fury, fending off Sirius' slobbery licks with his hands. Sirius gave bark and jumped off of Snape, sitting and wagging his tail as he continued to grin at him.

Snape struggled upright, dog drool dripping from his face. He eyed Sirius with a look of mingled rage and disgust and Tonks was certain he would quite happily have Avarda Kadavra'd Sirius right there and then if Dumbledore hadn't stepped in with his usual impeccable timing.

"Nice to see you two kiss and make up," he said with a faint smile. "If we could all proceed to the kitchen now. Severus, you might want to use a drying charm."

Tonks thought she could distinctly see McGonagall struggling to hold back laughter as she followed Dumbledore and an angrily muttering Snape into the kitchen. The second the door was closed behind the three of them, Sirius changed back to his human form and the two of them fell about laughing. Sirius grimaced and wiped the back of his hand over his mouth.

"I think I have grease on my tongue" he said with a look of utter revulsion. Tonks grinned and conjured him a glass of water which he gulped down before they headed towards the kitchen themselves and found seats around the table, as far away from Snape as was possible considering how crowded the room was, even with Remus and a few other Order members missing.

"Any news from Remus?" Tonks asked Sirius, watching as Kingsley and a few others greeted the Hogwarts contingent. Clearly Kingsley must have brought up Mundungus' letter in the Prophet because Minerva McGonagall blushed furiously (which was enough of a shock in itself), and then scowled angrily around the room seeking out the culprit. Mundungus, however, did not appear to be at the meeting.

"No, sorry," Sirius said, and then, gaze following Tonks' over to McGonagall and her furious stare added, "I haven't seen 'Dung either, which is odd. He was definitely supposed to be here tonight."

Tonks sniggered. "He's probably terrified of McGonagall, I know I would be if I was in his position."

Sirius joined her laughter, hoping a little laughter at the expense of the other Order members might distract her from Remus' absence. A minute or so later after more jokes, (this time aimed at Snape), Mundungus appeared to lighten the mood considerably.

"All righ' all righ' no bloody comments. It's for some undercover work," he yelled over the laughter that bounced off the walls as he tottered into the room. Tonks gasped in horror as she took in his appearance.

Mundungus was dressed in a short denim skirt and purple strappy top that Tonks had worn once to a party years ago and had been kicking about her closet ever since. He was also, she noted with worry, wearing a pair of her heels. They were low by anyone's standards, (she was rather clumsy after all), but Mundungus' feet were four sizes too big and he was wobbling dangerously as he pulled out a chair and flopped down, crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at everyone in the room. McGonagall didn't seem to know whether to laugh or be extremely worried about this latest development.

"Tell me 'Dung, does the female attire extend to undergarments or did you draw the line at heels and a skirt?" Sirius said, banging his fist on the table as he roared with laughter and Mundungus turned bright red.

"Well wouldn' you like to know," he said in a gruff voice. Sirius gaped at him and looked much discomforted at the thought. Tonks made a mental note go through all of her draws tonight and check what was missing.

Dumbledore attempted to call the meeting to order, which took some time considering the intensity of the laughter in the room and in the time it took for him to do so, Bill had managed to sneak something from his pocket which was quickly deposited into Snape's drink. He grinned and winked at Tonks and Sirius as he shuffled around the table to sit beside them.

"What - ?" Tonks began but Bill put a finger to his lips and leaned in closer to the two of them.

"Just keep your eyes on him, alright?"

They nodded fiercely and Sirius had a manic glint in his eyes as he fixed his gaze on Snape who was looking everywhere but at the three of them. After about ten minutes of listening to Dumbledore fill everyone in on the current situation, (including informing them, his eyes resting upon Tonks more times than was necessary, of Remus' current work), Snape raised his glass to his lips and took a large swig. Tonks focused on him, but after a couple of minutes during which he did not sprout feathers or show any signs of doing anything out of the ordinary, she looked up at Bill. He winked at her and mouthed the words, _"any second now,"_ to her.

"I think it would be best if we placed wards around -" Dumbledore broke off as a few people nudged each other and looked over in Snape's direction in confusion.

Snape sniggered. Tonks blinked once as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing and then he did it again. It was very discomforting sound, like the hiss of a rattlesnake and she looked over at Bill questioningly. He and Sirius were both grinning and looked like they were waiting for something.

"Severus, is there a problem?" Dumbledore asked cheerily.

"No, Professor . . ." Snape trailed off as he sniggered again and then let out a great "HA!" of laughter. Looking completely shocked at himself he covered his mouth and struggled to regain his composure. However he began to snigger again, and then his shoulders were shaking as he fought to suppress a snort, until eventually he couldn't anymore and he fell face first onto the table and howled with laughter.

"I'm sorry . . . Professor . . . I don't . . . I don't know . . . what's -"

He gave up trying to speak and almost choked as he forced himself to take another gulp of his drink in an attempt to quell the hysterics. This did him little good however as his laughter re-doubled and he fell backwards off his chair and lay on the floor, hand covering his face and tears streaming from his eyes as he rolled about laughing. By this point the majority of the Order had joined him in laughing, though some were looking genuinely concerned.

"All those years lacking a sense of humour must have got to him," Sirius said. "It's all been welling up and now he's finally exploded!"

Dumbledore fixed Sirius with a very suspicious glance but Sirius, who for once was entirely innocent of the crime, grinned back at him and shrugged. Dumbledore's gaze shifted to Tonks who was also grinning but also looking unmistakably surprised, and finally came to rest on Bill. Bill was looking smug.

"I think, Severus, you had better go and have a lie down," Dumbledore suggested as Snape struggled to his feet, hand stuffed in his mouth to stop from laughing. "Nymphadora, will take you through to the library whilst we continue with this meeting."  
Tonks noted the use of her first name and wondered whether she was being sent from the room like a naughty student, then decided that she didn't much care as that mischievous and slightly cheeky glint was in Dumbledore's eyes as he suggested that Sirius's warm greeting might have had strange effects upon Snape.

She stood up, Snape following, glaring at her despite choking back peels of laughter, and left the crowded kitchen.

"Err, do you . . ." Tonks bit back a laugh herself as Snape began sniggering uncontrollably at Kreacher as he wandered past them. "Do you want some water, or something maybe? To err, stop you from laughing."

_That was definitely a suspicious glare,_ Tonks thought as Snape stalked towards the library to sit down. Every now and then a loud "Ha!" would escape his lips and he would try to cover his mouth and force the laughter down. _That must have been one seriously strong laughter potion Bill slipped in his drink. _  
Tonks grinned at Snape's back as he disappeared into the room and was halfway towards leaving when she suddenly remembered she still had one more Snape related task. If she didn't do it now, she might not get another good opportunity, and considering he couldn't do any more than laugh hysterically right now, it might be the safest time to attempt it as well.

With an expression of nervous glee, she turned and strode back towards the library and stuck her head around the door. Snape, shaking with uncontrollable mirth, was seated in a high backed chair.

"Err right then, sure I can't get you anything?" she said, and heard the kitchen door open, Bill appeared at her side a moment later.

"Dumbledore's handed the meeting over to Moody. I got found out and he's having a little chat with Sirius now as well. Nothing to worry about, he seemed to find it pretty amusing himself," he added with a grin. Tonks nodded and sniggered slightly herself as Snape yelled out "No!" and then laughed again in reply to her question.

"Right, only I wouldn't mind helping you out you know," Tonks said in a cheery voice as she winked at Bill and he began to snigger too. "Yeah, you were always one of my favourite teachers at school."

Snape whirled around in his seat to face her and Bill slipped back against the wall outside so he wouldn't be seen. The look on Snape's face clearly communicated that he thought she was blatantly lying to him.

"Nymphado-"

He was cut off by a violent bought of laughing that left him coughing and Tonks' sides aching as she did her absolute best not to join him.

"Yeah, I had a bit of a crush on you actually!" she said very suddenly and then gave into the urge to laugh as Bill began howling uncontrollably beside her. With a last look in Snape's direction, just in time to see him glaring at her, his laughter having finally subsided, the two of them ran back towards the kitchen.

The rest of the meeting thankfully passed without incident and afterwards, Tonks cornered Dumbledore and he assured her that Remus would be back no later than tomorrow evening. He added that he didn't think Remus would be able to stay away that long and Tonks grinned at him and fought down the urge to blush.

The Order strode out into the hallway to find Snape leaving already, slamming the door with such force that the curtains over Mrs Black's portrait snapped open and she launched into her usual tirade against the occupants of Grimmauld place.

"FILTH, SCUM, TRAITORS! STAINS UPON THE BOTTOM OF THE CLOAKS OF MY FATHERS! NOT FIT TO STAND IN THE MOST NOBLE AND ANCIENT HOUSE OF -"

"FOUL MOUTHED, PETTY, UGLY TROLL OF A WOMAN! DESCENDED FROM THIEVES AND MURDERERS! NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO EVEN LOOK UPON THE MOST NOBLE AND HANDSOME FACE OF SIRIUS BLACK!"

Everyone looked around in surprise as Sirius verbally counterattacked his mother. He stood, feet apart, hands on hips, grin on face, right in front of her and reveled in leaving her utterly speechless with shock.

"UNFIT TO WIELD A WAND! NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO LICK MY BOOTS! HIDEOUS -"

Mrs Black was suddenly awakened from her reverie by the sight of the others in the hallway. She puffed herself up and began yelling insults at everyone within the vicinity.

"SHAPE SHIFTING FREAK OF A HALFBLOOD -"

"TOO UGLY FOR TONKS TO EVEN CONSIDER MORPHING INTO YOU AS A DISGUISE AS A HAG!" Sirius shot back and Mrs Black screeched at him as Tonks applauded him and felt immensely grateful towards her cousin.

"TRAITOR OF A SON, TRAITOR, TRAITOR -"

"USELESS HOUSE WITCH! COULDN'T EVEN CLEAN AS WELL AS KREACHER!"

Being compared to a house elf it seemed was too much for Mrs. Black to cope with. For the first time ever, the curtains sprang back into place of their own accord and all that was left to be heard was her occasional mutterings of discontent. The Order broke into applause and Sirius took a low and sweeping bow. Mrs. Black had been defeated.

A/N: Ok here's another (Snicker) Chapter and (Giggle) it's scores:

1st: Sirius with 322

2nd: Tonks with 240

3rd: Bill with 227

Last Mundungus with 152


	16. Monsters and Memory Loss

A/N: Hello! (peeks out behind door warily) ok here' s the next chapter of Fun & Games! Read and Review G-V

"It's dark in 'ere, I don't like it!"

The muffled squeak issued forth from above Tonks, Bill and Sirius and they didn't bother to stifle the laughter that bubbled up response. There was a thump and dust cascaded down, failing like snow upon their heads.

"Stop moving around up there 'Dung!" Sirius yelled and jabbed the trap door above him in the ceiling with his wand.

"There's rats!" was the indignant reply they heard and Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Then you should feel right at home."

"But they're creepin' around an' scuffling and . . . somethin's moving over there!"

Another loud bang sounded and then yelling.

"'Dung, you alright mate?" Bill shouted. Silence greeted his words and the three of them glanced at each other warily below.

"Oy you stinking thief, how are you doing up there?" Sirius said and gave the trap door another violent poke.

Above their heads, inside the Black attic, Mundungus Fletcher was quaking in his muddy boots. The rat that was looking up at him with interest (as well as wrinkling its nose at the smell), was about four times larger than it should have been and Mundungus was worried. In fact, he was terrified.

"It's lookin' at me funny!" he yelped and backed up a little, hitting his knees on some boxes and sitting down heavily in the dust, something scuttled away from his hand as he did.

The rat peered at 'Dung in the dark and approached cautiously as it tried to discern whether or not the terrible smell coming off of 'Dung's cloak meant something had died inside it that it could eat. 'Dung screamed slightly as the rat shuffled up to his feet and sniffed.

"You big sissy!" Tonks yelled as 'Dung shuffled backwards on his bum to put some space between himself and the rat that was the size of a small dog.

"It's gonna eat me!" he yelped and dived behind the boxes.

"What's going to eat you?" Bill yelled up to him, a slight edge of worry in his voice. They were all aware of the very strange things that lurked around in the dark in the Black house and did not envy Mundungus this task at all. Tonks very much doubted he would last and hour, in fact they had placed bets upon how long it would be before he emerged white faced and screaming.

"Rat!" Mundungus whimpered, and then a little louder, "Rat! Rat, rat, rat! There's 'undreds of 'em!"

Jumping behind the boxes had been a serious mistake as he had managed to land in a pile of shredded paper that seemed to be the nest of the monster rats that inhabited the attic. They were not happy about being awoken.

"Stupefy, stupefy, ahhhh!"

'Dung's shaking hand was severely impairing his already poor aim and every one of his spells was going well wide of the rats that were eyeing him with almost amused expressions, if that was possible for a rodent. The spells ricocheted around the room, bouncing off of boxes and chests and striking each other, until the inevitable happened.

"Sirius, what's that smell?" Tonks asked, looking at her cousin in confusion.

"I don't know, smells like -"

"FIRE!"

The trap door sprung open and Mundungus, not waiting for the ladder, tripped headfirst out of it and crashed to the ground at their feet. A small cloud of smoke followed him out and the four of them heard frantic scrabbling as the rats retreated from the flames.

Tonks, Bill and Sirius pushed past the quivering wreck that was Mundungus and grabbed the ladder hanging down from the opening in the ceiling, hauling themselves upwards and into the attic. There were cries of "augmenti" and a sizzling sound as the flames were doused quickly. The three of them then beat a hasty retreat away from the angry monster rats, Sirius locking the trap door from below, and on second thought, conjuring a very large padlock.

"Well," Sirius said, tucking away his wand and wiping sweat from his brow, "you officially failed that task 'Dung, as well as managing to destroy a set of Dad's natty old dress robes and prove yourself an utter coward. Congratulations."

Three hours later, and after some laughter at Mundungus' expense over a bottle of fire whiskey that Sirius had successfully hidden from Molly's purge earlier on in the day, the four of them strode up the stairs ready for bed. 'Dung eyed the trap door with a cautious look, stepping very deliberately to the left to avoid walking underneath it on the way to his bedroom.

"I err, think I might get the Kingsley task out of the way," he muttered, shuffling to the door of the bald headed Auror's room. He had luckily stayed after the meeting as he had a watch at half past two in the morning and didn't see the point in going home.

The three of them sniggered as they watched Mundungus apprehensively tap on Kingsley's door, clearly contemplating what he was more afraid of; the monster rats, or incurring the wrath of another Auror.

"Yes?"

Kingsley appeared in the doorway, frowning at Mundungus suspiciously and wearing a t-shirt that clearly Sirius had leant him for the night. Tonks deduced this from the fact that it was rather too small and therefore showed off his muscles in a way that made Mundungus cower and also had the legend _"bad guys get all the girls"_ stamped across it. The phrase seemed highly inappropriate for an Auror but Tonks grinned anyway and enjoyed seeing Mundungus gulp and back up a pace.

"There's err . . . there's . . ."

"Spit it out Fletcher!" Kingsley demanded, clearly eager to get some sleep before his watch. Mundungus visibly shook and stammered.

"There's something under my bed!"

Kingsley glanced at the three of them stood behind him and rolled his eyes.

"You have got to be kidding?" he said and Mundungus shook his head furiously.

"I may 'ave annoyed some giant, monster, rats earlier. They've got it in for me now! They're under my bed!"

Tonks sniggered loudly, Mundungus was genuinely afraid they might be there and followed Kingsley at a trot towards his bedroom. The three of them also stepped in to watch.

Kingsley strode around the bed in a circle, tapping his wand as if taking the matter very seriously.

"Giant rats eh? More a job for disposal of magical creatures, or the recruits in Magical Law Enforcement, not a senior Auror."

"Sorry!" Mundungus squeaked, staying well away from the bed just in case they really were under there.

Kingsley dropped to a crouch and peered under the bed, grinning at Mundungus as he stuck his arm under and swept it around.

"Nope, I would say you're pretty safe. Nothing under - OW!"

Kingsley tugged his arm back and stared down at the bite mark in disbelief. Mundungus gave a little scream of terror and jumped backwards into Bill, treading on his toes. Kingsley frowned at the dark space under the bed and snatched up his wand, diving flat on the floor and yelling "STUPEFY!" There was a squelchy thud and then he wriggled under the bed, reappearing on the other side with a triumphant expression and something clutched in his hand.

"Gotcha!" he said, grinning as he straightened up and thrust the limp sewage slug at 'Dung. "No more monsters under the bed 'Dung!"

Mundungus took the slug from him and grinned feebly before passing out in shock.

Tonks practically sprinted down the stairs in her dressing gown and slippers the next morning and narrowly avoided crashing into Sirius as she entered the kitchen. The second she opened her mouth to speak he cut her off with a grin and a wave of his hand.

"No, Remus is not back yet. No I have not heard from him and yes, he will be here this evening."

Tonks closed her mouth abruptly and dropped down in a chair as a chuckling Sirius placed a steaming cup of tea and two well buttered pieces of toast in front of her.

"I suggest," he said, coming to sit opposite her and adding a little fire whiskey to his coffee, "that you get some of the dodgier tasks out of the way before he gets back. Might ruin the mood otherwise."

Tonks scowled at him. _Ruin the mood?_ What exactly was he suggesting? That they were going to run into each other's arms like a pair of pathetic, love struck teenagers?  
_Not bloody likely,_ Tonks thought taking a tentative sip of her tea, pleased to find it had not been laced with fire whiskey.

"Alright then," she said, smirking at him over the rim of her mug, "suddenly I appear to have lost all memory of the Order and who everyone is."

Sirius rolled his eyes at her.

"No, no, no. Think about it, the task was, forget everything since you joined the Order. So, you would know about the Order, but you wouldn't remember everything that's been going on."

"This is going to be impossible," she muttered as Mad-Eye entered the room. Apparently he had only just gotten out of bed because he was still adjusting his magical eye in its socket. No matter how many times Tonks saw this, it always made her shudder and this morning was no exception, in fact she very nearly spilt her tea across the table.

"Want to be more careful, Nymphadora. Hot tea will give you a nasty burn. Never forget, constant, vigilance!" Moody grunted at her as he sat down in a vacant chair.

"Right, yes vigilant, vigilant!" Tonks said enthusiastically. Moody shot her an extremely suspicious glance. Where was the sarcastic remark? The quick witted comeback? Something wasn't right.

"You all right lass? You sound a little - odd."

"Oh great, wonderful! Really excited to be here that's all! I mean the Order and everything and keeping Harry safe and -"

Moody's eyes had widened considerably.

"She took a serious tumble earlier, knocked her head," Sirius said calmly. "Lost her memory I think."

Moody grabbed Tonks' shoulders and spun her in her chair to look at him, surprise written all over her face. She stuck out a hand and grinned at him.

"Nice to meet you!"

Moody shook her slightly and stared at her with his magical eye, scrutinising her features.

"Snap, out, of, it, Nymphadora!" he growled, and Tonks frowned at him.

"It's Tonks mate, and don't you forget it."

"Do you remember the others in the Order?" he asked, an edge of concern creeping into his voice as he stared at her. Sirius began chewing furiously on his toast to stop from laughing.

"Well, there's that red headed lot -"

"- the Weasleys!" Mad-Eye cut in, the frantic shaking ceasing.

"And then there was that stinky bloke -"

"Fletcher!" Mad-Eye growled.

"Yeah, yeah, that was it. Erm, who else, who else?" Tonks tapped her chin thoughtfully as Sirius decided to pipe up.

"What about Remus? Surely you remember him?"

"Was he that nice bloke that I tripped into, over that umbrella stand?" she asked innocently and Sirius nodded with a grin. "Oh, sort of. He seemed alright. Is he around?"

Mad-Eye was looking seriously worried now and didn't even notice when Molly Weasley strode into the kitchen, looking at the three of them in front of her with confusion.

"What on earth is going on?" she asked, addressing Sirius for once.

"Tonks has lost her memory, doesn't remember a thing from since she joined."

Molly's eyes widened almost as much as Moody's had and she plonked herself down in a chair facing Tonks, casting a worried glance over her. Tonks fought the desperate urge to laugh and merely smiled at her in blank way.

"Hi there. You must be one of the Weasleys," she said and Molly gaped at her.

"You don't remember anything, dear?" Molly said in disbelief.

"Not even Remus," Sirius chimed in helpfully and Tonks almost gave herself away when she glared at him.

"Not even Remus?" Molly said, looking between Sirius and Tonks for confirmation that this might be true. Sirius nodded his head and Tonks shrugged.

"Tall fella? Greying hair, erm, something else about him, can't remember what . . ." Tonks looked around aimlessly as if taking in the kitchen for the first time.

"Werewolf?" Moody prompted and Tonks smiled.

"Yeah, that might have been it."

"Right, that's it! There has to be a way to fix this!"

Moody sprang upright from his chair, wooden leg clunking loudly on the flagstones. He drew his wand and brandished it at Tonks who shrank back against the table, looking at Sirius with a pleading glance.

"I'm not sure that's necessary Mad-Eye -"

"-Nonsense," the old Auror said. "I'll have her fixed in no time."

Moody rapped her sharply on the head once with his wand and muttered a spell under his breath. Tonks felt a strange soaring sensation in her stomach and then suddenly memories were rushing through her head, scenes from her childhood flashing up in front of her eyes. It was all very confusing and making her very dizzy.

"Anything?" Mad-Eye asked, a look of grim determination stamped across his features.

Tonks shook her head and he raised his wand again, ready for another go.

"Wait, wait!" she yelled, throwing her hands up to cover her aching head. Mad-Eye stopped, wand inches away from her hair. "I think, I think things are coming back," she said, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

"Oh?" Moody growled suspiciously and peered at her.

"Yep, erm, I remember you, Molly," Tonks said and was pleased to see the look of relief that passed across Mrs Weasley's face. "Yep, definitely back now, remember everything."

Sirius laughed and shoved his whiskey laced coffee at her.

"Drink up, it'll stop your head spinning," he said with a grin as Tonks took a large gulp.

Tonks found she was still nursing an aching head almost an hour later after Moody had gone off to work leaving her and Sirius in the kitchen with Molly Weasley, who seemed to think Tonks' sudden memory loss was due to a lack of decent food, and was therefore currently making pancakes for her and Sirius.

"You had us all worried there for a moment," Molly said, bustling around behind them.

"Yeah, err sorry about that," Tonks muttered, noticing the mischievous look in Sirius' eyes and feeling slightly nervous.

"Not to worry dear, not to worry. Although it would have been awfully difficult to try and explain everything that has happened to you again."

"Yeah we'd have to go over the whole Remus thing, and that would be awkward now wouldn't it?" Sirius hissed in a low voice. Tonks tipped the dregs of her tea over his head.

"And I suspect _some_ people," Molly looked pointedly at Sirius, busy drying his hair with his wand, "would have tried to convince you of things that weren't true."

Sirius gave her his best, most innocent smile. Molly merely frowned at him and turned back to the stove.

"Yes, Molly here would have had a lot of fun setting you up with Bill no doubt," Sirius said and noted the snort of annoyance that came from said Weasley woman's direction. "He is rather handsome," Sirius continued and Tonks raised an eyebrow. "Very err, dashing, what with the long hair and the earring."

Molly began tipping pancakes onto plates for the two of them as Sirius continued to list Bill's attributes to Tonks.

"Intelligent too, always friendly. Strong I suspect . . ."

Tonks sniggered loudly and covered her hand with her mouth as Molly came over and deposited plates piled high with pancakes in front of them. She was looking at Sirius with a very strange, and faintly worried, expression.

"I bet all the girls liked him at Hogwarts, and a few guys as well."

Molly dropped the dishcloth she had been carrying and had to stoop to retrieve it from the floor.

"Oh yes, man like Bill, definitely a hit with the -"

"He's seeing Fleur," Molly said in a shrill voice, seating herself at the table and glaring at Sirius. It was the first time Tonks had ever heard Molly sound almost relieved that her son was seeing Fleur. Sirius was very definitely getting his points for this task.

"Really?" Sirius said, cutting up his pancakes with a thoughtful expression. "Well that's a shame."

He took a mouthful and smiled faintly at the stunned expression upon Mrs Weasley's face.

"Lovely pancakes Molly," he added.

The first thing Remus Lupin saw when he stepped in through the front door of Grimmauld place that evening was not at all what he had been expecting, or hoping. In the back of his mind he had imagined Tonks appearing at the doorway with no one else around, giving him time to talk to her before they had to join the others in the kitchen for the Order meal. Instead, he was greeted by a decidedly odd scene.

"But Bill, you are so absolutely marvellous. I never want to spend a moment away from you!"

Before Remus' eyes caught up with his ears, he thought that perhaps Fleur was in the house, but instead, a sprinting Emmeline Vance cut across his vision, almost knocking him backwards as she chased after Bill who was yelling in surprise as he bounded up the stairs, making a break for his bedroom. The door slammed shut and Remus heard the distinctive click of a number of locking spells being put in place.

"No wooden door shall keep us apart!" Emmeline yelled and Remus gaped in disbelief as she proceeded to cast hex after hex at the very sturdy (and no doubt magically reinforced) door.

"What on earth . . ?" Remus murmured as Sirius appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, laughing and holding a half empty goblet of some pink liquid that looked distinctly like -

"Love potion!" Sirius said with a grin, vanishing the rest of the potion and chucking the goblet back into the room over his shoulder as he approached Remus. "Emmeline may have drunk rather a large amount earlier."

"Should I even bother to enquire as to why Bill decided to feed Emmeline Vance of all people love potion?" Remus asked, shrugging off his cloak and hanging it on the hook beside the door.

"Probably best not to," Sirius replied. "Good trip?"

Remus rolled his eyes and followed Sirius up the stairs, both intent upon rescuing Bill.

"It was useful enough. Is . . . is Tonks around?" Remus asked in an offhand voice.

Sirius grinned at him over his shoulder as he summoned the antidote to the love potion and turned Emmeline around. She struggled in his grip, yelling things through the closed door to Bill.

"She's -"

Sirius didn't bothering finishing as Tonks appeared in the doorway of the library downstairs. Instead he forced Emmeline to drink the potion and watched with a grin at the horror dawning on her features.

"Did I . . . what just . . . I mean . . !"

She looked at the mischievous smirk on Sirius' face, and then to Remus for confirmation of her fears. Remus however, was already distracted elsewhere.

"Hello Tonks," he said quietly, smiling slightly as he strode back down the stairs and approached her.

"Wotcher Remus," she replied awkwardly, glancing up to see Sirius grinning at her as he coaxed Bill back out of his room and attempted to vaguely comfort a furiously blushing Emmeline.

Tonks hesitated a moment, then decided she didn't care particularly what Sirius thought and pulled Remus into a fierce hug that he returned, surprised at first, and then equally as fiercely, laughing as her arms wrapped around his neck.

"You really missed me that much?" he asked hesitantly as she drew back.

"Yes," she answered honestly.

The door to the kitchen creaked open and Mundungus stepped out, eyeing the two of them with surprise as he hastily tucked something back into his robes.

"Alrigh' Remus?" he muttered, shuffling past them and smirking at Bill and Sirius as they descended the stairs. Emmeline hurried past them into the kitchen, still looking highly embarrassed.

"Tonks, can we have a word?" Bill said as Remus released her, looking slightly nervous as he realised how many people were around them. Tonks looked slightly rueful but nodded as she followed Sirius, Bill and Mundungus into the library.

"I'll see you at the meal," Remus said and she nodded before closing the door.

As soon as Sirius had cast a muffilato charm just in case anyone wandered past, Tonks turned on the three of them. "Could you not have waited just a few minutes?"

"Clam down, calm down!" Sirius said with a grin. "You two can have a little chat later. Right now, we've got something more important to do."

Tonks raised an eyebrow and glared at Sirius. He gestured to Mundungus who drew four slim phials of potion from his robes.

"Oh you're kidding?" Tonks said with a groan. Sirius grinned and shook his head.

"Deadly serious. It's the Order meal, everyone is here. Veritaserum time, Tonks!"

He took the phials from Mundungus and handed them out to the others, raising his in salute.

"Cheers mateys!"

All four drained the phials.

A/N: Alright! Here's the next segment and here are the scores

1st place: Sirius with 402 points

2nd place: Tonks with 310 points

3rd place: Bill with 307 points

Last place: Mundungus with 222 points


	17. Veritaserum

A/N: okay folks have fun! G-V

Tonks had never felt as nervous in all her life as when she followed Sirius, Mundungus and Bill into the kitchen that evening. Her final Auror exam had been scary, and waiting for her NEWT results sufficiently nerve racking, but it was nothing compared to what she felt now. The difference was, she knew she would make a fool of herself tonight, and there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.

Remus smiled at her as she entered and rose from his seat to draw out a chair for her beside him, sitting back down as Tonks glanced up at Sirius; he was grinning at her and her stomach felt leaden.

"Everything alright?"

Remus' slightly hoarse voice brought her back to reality and she turned quickly to give him a reassuring smile.

"Feeling nervous," Tonks blurted out. It seemed the veritaserum was taking very quick effect.

_That must have been strong stuff 'Dung gave us,_ she thought.

Remus raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything as Molly had just arrived between the two of them to spoon out carrots and peas onto their plates.

"That'll be enough for me, thank you Molly," Remus said and she shook her head, adding a few more vegetables to his plate.

"You can't have been eating properly whilst you were away Remus; I've seen those rations that Alistor hands out." She tutted disapprovingly then shuffled further down the table to pile vegetables on Bill's plate.

Tonks took a moment to take in everyone around the table. To her left sat Moody, (eyeing his sprouts with some trepidation) and beyond him, Kingsley, Bill and Mundungus. Sirius was sat in his usual position at the head of the table. Opposite Tonks sat Molly and Arthur and to their right, Emmeline Vance, Hestia Jones, Minerva McGonagall and Dumbledore. It seemed that Snape had decided to pass on dinner to avoid further embarrassment.

"A toast!" Sirius called out, raising his glance in the air. Tonks followed suit with the rest of the table and prayed he wouldn't say something utterly ridiculous. "A toast to the Order of the Phoenix and its members!"

The others murmured agreement and drank heartily, Tonks felt a slight weight lift from her chest, perhaps Sirius would go easy on her as Remus was here.

"So, what does everyone think of the food?" Molly asked, smiling around at them all.

"Great!" Tonks said enthusiastically, extremely grateful that she did indeed like the meal this evening. If Molly had asked her two nights ago when they'd had that soup, it would have been a different story.

"Wonderful as ever, Molly," Sirius said.

"S'excellent," Mundungus mumbled around a large mouthful.

"I hate the sprouts," Bill said.

All eyes turned on him as Molly raised an eyebrow.

"You will eat your greens young man. You always managed at home, so you certainly shall now," she said in her most motherly voice.

Bill turned a little red as he announced in a loud voice that in fact, he and his brothers used to throw them at the gnomes out of the window. Molly's eyes widened and Arthur chuckled slightly.

"Dad did too!" Bill said, giving his father a very apologetic grin as Mrs Weasley rounded on her husband.

"You! You encouraged them! Well, Ginny and Ron will certainly not be getting away with it anymore. I shall be keeping a close eye on all of you!"

Tonks sniggered and looked over at Remus to see him battling to contain laughter as well. They both managed to stifle sniggers by quickly eating the potatoes, Remus complimenting Molly on her cooking skills in an attempt to placate her. Most of the table decided it was best to keep out of this family argument and stayed quiet, however, Hestia who was clearly uncomfortable with the sudden silence, decided to strike up the conversation.

"So, what has everyone been up to today?" she said. "Tonks? Had a nice day?"

It was such an innocent question, and yet all of a sudden Tonks could feel answers welling up that she really did not want to give. But she had taken the potion and there was no going back now.

"No, I was waiting for Remus to come back," she blurted and then hid her face very quickly. The table went very, very quiet again, until someone, possibly Mundungus, started sniggering. Said person received a swift elbow to the ribs from Bill and shut up immediately. Tonks wanted the floor to open up and swallow her; clearly Sirius's input was not necessary in order to make her look a fool.

Just as she was praying someone else would say or do something to draw attention away from her burning cheeks, she felt a soft touch on her arm and looked down to see Remus' hand resting there. Dumbledore appeared to have struck up conversation with the rest of the table and Tonks allowed herself to raise her gaze to Remus' and give him a weak, apologetic smile.

"Sorry about that," she muttered, "must have looked like a right idiot."

"Not at all, I . . . well it's very sweet of you to say . . . I mean . . ." Remus trailed off and glanced down at his hand resting on her arm as if only just realising it was there. He slowly withdrew it and began eating again, smiling at Tonks reassuringly as he did so and she brightened a little.

The four competitors spent the next five minutes shovelling down food to stop themselves from talking and casting each other furtive glances. Sirius was beginning to look restless and that could not be a good thing.

"You're looking a little quiet down there Moony, you and Tonks run out of things to say to each other?"

Tonks was unsure whether that was Sirius' usual bluntness or the effects of the veritaserum, either way, she could feel herself beginning to blush again and glare at Sirius. Beside her Remus chuckled and set his fork down as he looked over at Sirius.

"No, merely enjoying Molly's lovely food." Remus glanced down at Tonks and, noting her uneasiness again, decided to change the topic. "They rather remind of the food at Hogwarts, the wonderful meals we used to have there, wouldn't you say?"

Sirius shrugged.

"Sure, they were great, the house elves were always very generous."

"Oh yes," Remus said cheerfully, "they always seemed very forthcoming with food for you, especially when you used to sneak out at night to get butter beer."

Sirius had glanced over at the affronted look McGonagall's face and seemed to be trying very hard to contain himself, which under the circumstances was completely useless.

"Oh yeah, right under all the teacher's noses, was fantastic. We had such great parties after drinking all that butter beer."

Despite the fact that he was blurting this information out in front of former teachers, there was very definitely a nostalgic and wistful edge to Sirius' voice as he talked that made Tonks very glad they had decided upon going ahead with this tournament; it must have felt like being back in the marauders for him.

"Oh yes, I remember that very interesting night involving one Milicent Gillwater's clothing," Remus said, smiling up at Sirius who's face had suddenly gone very pale. He mouthed the words, 'you wouldn't, Moony' at Remus, who pretended not to notice. "Yes, Sirius I think you should tell everyone here what happened, they all look so intrigued now."

Sirius glared at his old friend, and then against his will began blurting out the kinds of information that most people contained, even when very drunk, for fear of humiliating themselves entirely.

"I'd drunk so much butter beer, couldn't handle the stuff at all at that age, and well Millicent's trunk was downstairs because she was going home for Christmas so I stole her underwear and ran around the common room in it. She walked and got a bit angry."

"Tell them what she did, Sirius," Remus said, trying very hard not to laugh as the rest of the table fell about in peels of laughter.

"She hexed the stuff to stick to me, couldn't get it off for weeks until I eventually went to madam Pomfrey to get it removed."

Tonks had completely cracked up by this point and was crying with laughter as Sirius turned bright red and began eating very quickly to stop himself from being able to blurt out any more information.

"Anything else you want to ask Sirius, Remus?" Bill said, glad that his mother had finally stopped glaring at him in order to stare at Sirius in horror; she seemed to have been rather put off her food too.

Remus grinned up at Sirius who had a pleading edge to his gaze as he returned Remus' stare. Sirius actually closed his eyes and looked like he might be trying to make himself invisible by sheer force of will as Remus began speaking again. He needn't have worried to much, Remus was content with the having got his own back on Sirius, for now at least.

"Oh, in my absence, my watch seems to have disappeared from my room; I don't suppose you would know anything about that would you, Padfoot old friend?"

Sirius looked genuinely baffled and shook his head, Mundungus however looked suddenly very nervous; there would be no worming his way out of this one if Remus decided to question him.

"Mundungus, you seem very uncomfortable all of sudden," Remus said in a friendly voice that carried no hint of threat. 'Dung gulped. "I don't suppose you would know what has happened to it, would you?"

"S'in my bedroom draw," he blurted and then slapped a hand over his mouth. All eyes turned on him as Remus continued talking.

"And my rather old and treasured books on dark creatures wouldn't happen to be lurking in that draw would they?"

"Under the bed," 'Dung said and then ducked as if expecting a curse to hit him.

"Anything else we should know about whilst we're at it, 'Dung?" Sirius asked cheerfully.

"Silver cutlery in my sock drawer, Mad-Eye's order of Merlin award, under a loose floorboard along with Tonks broom repair kit. Some books from the library, the trophies from the living room and the astronomy set, under my bed . . ."

Mundungus continued listing his stolen items for a good few minutes as everyone around the table grew more and more irritated. By the time Mundungus was finished, everyone except for Dumbledore was glaring at him and it looked like another duel was on the verge of breaking out.

"Well Mundungus, if you would be so good as to return these items then I am sure all is forgiven," Dumbledore said placidly and 'Dung nodded weakly.

"Not bloody likely!" Bill, Sirius and Tonks yelled together.

"He stole our stuff," Bill said.

"And he would have sold it all," Sirius demanded.

"I really like my broom repair kit," Tonks added. "And you shouldn't take Remus' stuff either."

"Yeah, he hasn't got much," Sirius blurted. Tonks cringed on his behalf and looked up at Remus to see a very strained smile appear on his features.

"Thank you, Sirius," he said through gritted teeth and Tonks could see him blushing slightly as he ducked his head and avoided the eyes of everyone at the table.

"Sirius that was unfair," Tonks found herself saying, completely unaware of her brain ever having given her mouth the order to speak. It was too late to take it back now though as Sirius was readying his veritaserum fuelled reply.

"You always back Remus over me, I'm family," he replied and then hastily looked away from the two of them.

"Remus is practically family too," Tonks replied defiantly.

The air of tension around the dinner table had thickened to the point where it was stifling and a few people, including Molly Weasley who usually liked to get involved in whatever verbal disagreement was taking place, seemed ready to beat a hasty retreat to anywhere else in the house.

"Tonks, it would be best if you left this," Remus said quietly, his hand returning to its earlier position on her arm.

As much as she would have liked to, Tonks found that now the ball had been set rolling by Sirius, there was nothing she could do stop words tripping over themselves to get out of her mouth.

"I'm not leaving it Remus, he's being unfair to you," she said, turning her gaze on Sirius who looked like he was trying very hard to contain something he really didn't want to say. It was completely useless though.

"You only think that because you fancy him," Sirius blurted. All eyes turned on Tonks, including Remus' which looked if not completely surprised, hopeful.

"I don't fancy Remus," she said, looking straight at Sirius who wore an apologetic look that made it clear to her that he was seriously regretting blurting that revelation out in full view of the rest of the order. "I don't fancy him," Tonks continued, realising where this was going and feeling her face glow red in anticipation, "I love him."

Someone dropped a fork on their plate with a very loud clatter and someone else choked on their drink as Tonks rose from her chair, the wood scraping backwards loudly over the flagstones, and walked quickly from the room.

The door to the kitchen shut with a bang and she breathed out a sigh, whether of relief at having gotten out of the kitchen without enduring any remarks, or whether in horrible embarrassment that this was how Remus had found out how she felt, she wasn't sure. Tonks moved away from the closed door quickly and was heading down the passageway to the deserted library, when she heard it click open again and the low hum of excited voices could be heard briefly before it was gently closed again. Soft footfalls joined her hurried steps, and then a quiet voice cut made her stop in her tracks.

"Tonks?"

She turned around to see Remus stood there, watching her with an unreadable expression. He was so quiet, so reserved, that she thought he must be angry at her for stupidly blurting her feelings out like that.

"Are you alright?" he asked, taking a few steps closer.

"No," she replied honestly. "I just humiliated the two of us in front of most of the order."

He stopped moving barely a footstep away from her, studying her features with such a soft intensity that she wanted to turn away but found she couldn't.

"I don't think there is anything humiliating at all about having a beautiful girl tell everyone that she is in love with me. In fact, I can't think of anything much more wonderful than that."

Tonks stared at him in disbelief. He hadn't taken the veritaserum like the rest of them, he could just be trying to make her feel better, she thought. Well, she didn't want to be made to feel better, she just wanted the truth. Considering that was all he had heard from her this evening, she felt she deserved it.

"I didn't mean to say it," she said quietly and he nodded, a slight smile twitching the corners of his mouth upwards and lightening his features.

"No, I realised quite early on that the four of you had consumed a rather strong batch of veritaserum," he said, a mischievous sparkle in his eyes as he recalled Sirius' face during his questioning earlier on.

"How . . . ?" Tonks asked her eyes widening.

"Oh, Sirius slipped James some in our sixth year, I recognized the signs immediately." He smiled slightly and added, "I also noticed Mundungus slipping the potion back into his robes when he saw me earlier. You had your back to him at that point so you wouldn't have seen but, well, you know how shifty Mundungus manages to look even when he is doing something perfectly innocent."

Tonks grinned and nodded as Remus carefully moved a little closer to her.

"Has it worn off yet?" he asked, his voice lower and more serious than before.

"No," she replied and he sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair.

"It's just, knowing that you've taken it, knowing that you can't guard anything you say, well it makes me feel like I'm interrogating you," he said uncomfortably, eyes meeting hers. Tonks shrugged.

"I try to be honest with you all the time anyway."

The gratitude that shone on his features was clearer and more honest than any veritaserum fuelled words were. His lips twitched upwards again in a smile, more broad than before as he looked down at her.

"Ahh, but what about this tournament?" he said and laughed quietly as Tonks' mouth fell open.

"It was an idea me and Sirius had," she said without thinking, "just a way to stop him being so bored and for us to have fun as well."

"So," Remus said looking thoughtful once more, "that day you stole my shirt, and when you made me say I thought pink hair was very sexy, oh and the other day with the shower -"

"Was me winning points, yeah. But it was fun, and I meant all the things I said," she added. She could actually feel the veritaserum beginning to wear off now, but she was determined to remain being completely honest with him.

"I see. Well I suppose I should tell you that I found the score sheet and I've guessed a few times what you were all up to."

Tonks nodded, figuring she probably should have realised that he had realised and berating herself for not taking more care with where she left the sheet; Mad-Eye certainly would not approve of her lack of vigilance.

"Is there anything else you want to tell me?" she asked him, trying to keep her voice calm and composed.

"What would you like me to tell you?"

Tonks paused and thought very long and hard. She knew what it was she wanted to hear; she knew that now she had said the words and things were finally out in the open she had a right to ask him to be as honest with her. But what if he did not reply how she hoped? It was, she thought, a risk that needed to be taken.

"That you love me," Tonks replied as he took her hand, weaving their fingers together carefully. She felt warmth spread from her fingers, up her arm and through her whole body at his touch.

"Is that veritaserum talking or you?" he asked, studying their entwined fingers closely.

"Me. You know how reliable anything 'Dung gets hold of is. It was strong stuff, but it didn't last long."

Remus chuckled lightly and raised her hand up to his face to kiss each of her knuckles gently.

"Considering how honest you have been with me this evening, inadvertently or otherwise," he said, lowering their hands again, "it would be less than gentlemanly of me not to be so honest in return." Remus paused momentarily to wrap his arms gently around her and completely close the gap between them and smile as he looked down at her. "I love you."

Tonks held her breath for a second and glanced around her, expecting Sirius or one of the others to burst out of the kitchen any second to ruin the moment as per usual. For once however, no one appeared and she pressed into Remus, grinning broadly. Then she leaned up on her toes and kissed him even as he leaned down to meet her.

Remus' arms tightened around her as he returned with everything he had, the emotion that he could feel her trying to convey to him. Tonks could feel the rough coating of stubble on his cheeks and chin brushing against her own skin and one hand running gently through her hair. It was perfect, and certainly dryer than it would have had she given into the temptation to kiss him when they had been stood in the broken shower, she thought as she drew back slightly for breath and to look up at him. The warm, contented smile that he seemed to reserve only for her was spread across his features.

"We took rather a long time to get around to that, didn't we?" he murmured, cutting off any reply she might have given by closing the tiny gap between their lips and kissing her again, his lips moving gently over hers.

"We did," Tonks agreed breathlessly when they broke away again and leant back against his arms.

"So," Remus said, smiling down at her, "what happens now?"

Tonks took on a mock thoughtful expression as if pondering deeply the answer to his question.

"I'd say we kiss some more," Remus nodded agreement, "and then after that, well that's for us to find out really isn't it?"

Remus chuckled and kissed the top of her head lightly.

"I was referring to what we do next in terms of this tournament of yours, though I very much like your answer."

"Ahh," Tonks said, looking genuinely thoughtful this time. "Well, I suppose we just have to wait and see . . ."

A/N: Okay no one gained any points so no point in listing the scores but tell me what you all think of my fluffy scene. G-V


	18. The Last Laugh

Tonks bounced down to breakfast the next morning, successfully making it down the stairs without tripping, easily avoiding the troll's foot umbrella stand and looking every bit as elegant as a ballerina as she entered the kitchen and swept around getting herself cereal and tea. Then, balancing everything carefully with a levitating charm, she made her way to the table where she set everything down without spilling a drop. It was a miracle, a one off, an event so rare that the sky should have caved in and the very fabric of space twisted itself inside out. Tonks was suddenly graceful!

"This morning can not get any better!" she said aloud, marveling at her own sudden skills.

But of course, she was wrong; the morning could indeed get better. An awful lot better, she thought as the door opened and a smiling Remus Lupin walked in wearing an old blue dressing gown over his pajamas and promptly strode over to kiss her and murmur good morning before fetching his own breakfast. A moment later and he was seated beside her, stifling a yawn and looking both very happy and also slightly bemused at how everything seemed to have worked out so perfectly for him.

"So, what's the plan for the day?" he asked. "Any terribly embarrassing tasks you are supposed to carry out?"

Tonks took a gulp of her tea and then drew from her pocket the very well worn and carefully folded piece of parchment that had the various tasks written down upon it. She scanned them before handing the parchment over to Remus who chuckled and shook his head with disbelief as he read through them all.

"So, today you have to attempt this painting of Alistor?" Remus asked and Tonks nodded.

"Is he around?"

Remus shrugged and folded the parchment back up, sliding it over to her.

"I have to admit, I wasn't really paying much attention to the whereabouts of anyone but you last night, so I've no idea whether he's here or not."

Tonks laughed and finished off her breakfast, sending everything over to the sink where it settled into the water without anything breaking. She noted Remus' eyebrows rose in surprise and gave him a playful thump on the arm.

"I am an Auror, remember. I can be very graceful when I want to be."

"Of course," Remus replied though Tonks gave him a pointed and disbelieving look.

"Oy mate, don't forget the other task I've got to do, I could very easily make that one horribly embarrassing for you," Tonks said, referring of course to the mistletoe task that Sirius had been pushing for her to get on with since day one of the tournament.

"After last night's impressive declaration Tonks, I doubt being kissed by you in front of everyone would be that embarrassing," Remus countered and Tonks begrudgingly had to agree with him. The two of them had successfully avoiding seeing any of the other Order members since the evening meal and Tonks was not looking forward to the inevitable comments and amused expressions. Or possibly a lecture from Moody.

"By the way," Remus said quietly as the kitchen door opened and Sirius stumbled bleary eyed into the room, "it says you've got to kiss three people. Any thoughts on who the other two lucky people will be?"

"Assuming you're one of the three," Tonks said and Remus smirked slightly

"I should hope so, yes."

Tonks grinned and considered telling him he wasn't for a moment, but then decided that she wouldn't be able to keep a straight face whilst lying.

"You're supposed to act horribly jealous by the way, not interested."

Remus raised his eyebrows and smiled at her as Sirius dropped with a heavy sigh into a chair opposite the two of them and summoned the bottle of hangover cure from the cupboard.

"Ahh, but, Tonks, I would assume you won't kiss the other two in quite the same manner as you kiss me, and therefore, they are the ones who should be very jealous."  
Tonks couldn't fault his reasoning and quite liked the slightly smug look Remus wore at the thought that he was indeed the only one who could kiss her properly now.

"When you two are quite finished fawning over each other, I have a hangover and need sympathy," Sirius said in a loud voice.

"Shouldn't have drunk so much then," Tonks replied quickly as Remus cast Sirius an entirely unsympathetic look and rose from his seat to wash up the breakfast things.

"I was celebrating you two fools finally getting your act's together," Sirius muttered between hearty gulps of hangover cure.

As Tonks and Sirius continue to lazily argue over his consumption of fire whiskey, Mundungus entered the kitchen and grinned broadly when he saw Remus and Tonks.

"Alrigh' you two?" he said, winking in what he clearly intended to be a subtle way to Remus who rolled his eyes and sat back down at the kitchen table beside Tonks. "Everything going, err, well?"

"Yes thank you, Mundungus," Remus replied, glancing over at Tonks who was smirking and shaking her head as she thought about the fact that they were going to have to endure this level of conversation with everyone all day.

"Right', righ'" Mundungus said, and then he attempted to lean in closer to Tonks, dropping his voice to what he considered a whisper but was actually loud enough for Sirius to hear on the other side of the table. "Is, err, is he in a good mood?" 'Dung asked, jerking a thumb in Remus' direction. Remus pretended not to see and began reading the paper.

Tonks frowned at Mundungus and nodded.

"Good, good, only I was gonna have a go at that werewolf policies task. Just didn't wanna risk it if he was in a dodgy mood you know, I quite like having all my limbs attached."

Tonks sniggered and looked over at Remus whose expression was unreadable as he turned the page and continued to pretend not to be able to hear anything Mundungus was saying despite the fact that Sirius was trying to hide his laughter.

"Anythin', anythin' you know, interesting' in the paper today, Remus?" Mundungus asked in a complete failure of an attempt at an offhand voice.

Remus looked up and smiled slightly.

"Well, Mundungus that would depend upon what you find interesting wouldn't it?"

Mundungus looked a little confused and then shrugged.  
"Yeah, probably, righ', righ'. I was just wonderin' if there was anymore stuff in there about those werewolf policies that toad woman Umbridge has been introducing."

Remus chuckled and shut the paper, tossing it across to Sirius who immediately flicked to the sports pages at the back to check the result of the Chudley Cannon's last game.

"No, there is nothing new in there about them," Remus assured him and leant back in his chair, looking across at Tonks with an amused expression. She grinned back at him and rolled her eyes as Mundungus ploughed on with his task.

"Shame, I think she could do with introducing some more you know," he said, looking across at Remus to gauge his reaction to this piece of news. Remus put on his best surprised face and 'Dung gulped a little before continuing. "Yeah, I reckon Umbridge has got the right idea about the furry creatures, they need sorting out you know."

"Really?" Remus said, his voice dropping a tone and carrying a slight warning note in it. "And what delightful policies would you suggest that Umbridge introduce next?"

Mundungus licked his lips nervously and glanced around at the other two for help; they were too busy stifling sniggers however to come to his rescue and so Mundungus continued to verbally dig a deeper hole for himself.

"I dunno, lock 'em all up, or keep 'em away from normal people."

Remus pretended, quite effectively it seemed from the way Mundungus was cowering, to look very offended, drawing his wand from his trouser pocket and brandishing it at Mundungus.

"Say that again, Mundungus, and I'll hex your nose to stick to a different part of your anatomy," he threatened. Mundungus gave a yelp and jumped up from the table, knocking his chair over backwards onto the flagstones.

"Sorry, sorry, didn' mean anything by it!" he muttered frantically, backing away a few paces and holding his hands out in front of him defensively. Remus seemed to consider this very hard, wand still pointing directly at Mundungus' nose, over which 'Dung now firmly clamped his hands.

"I don't want to hear another word about _that issue_ from you ever again. Understood?"

Mundungus nodded frantically and then scuttled out of the room, tripping a number of times as he refused to turn his back on Remus for fear of being cursed.

When Mundungus had gone, Sirius collapsed into peels of laughter and Remus chuckled to himself, tucking his wand back into his pocket and grinning over at Tonks.  
"Very impressive, almost had _me_ fooled," she said and Remus looked rather pleased with himself.

It was some time later before Moody appeared, and in the interval Tonks had been around the house, hanging mistletoe above doorways and carefully considering who the other two people would be.

She was narrowing down the list considerably but was still little closer to figuring it out. She had however decided that for her own health it was bests that Mundungus was not one of the two, and if she did not want to be turned into a ferret, then it couldn't be Moody either. Kingsley was out of the question because she worked with him and it would be far too odd, Dumbledore was older than her grandfather, and resembled him far too much, so Tonks flatly refused to kiss him and she was definitely making sure the other person was male so that ruled out a number of Order members. Sirius had suggested himself, but had suddenly looked very worried when Tonks reminded him that they were in fact related, and Tonks had almost given up hope of thinking of two suitable candidates when Moody arrived to distract her from that task entirely.

She jumped up from her seat immediately to ask Moody whether he would mind having his portrait painted by her, but Bill surprisingly got there first and immediately launched into a long winded and not very believable story about Fleur enjoying dancing and he needing to learn very quickly.

"And well, none of the others can dance a step and Kingsley mentioned once that you used to be rather a good dancer, so I was wondering if you'd mind teaching me a few basic steps?" Bill finished, looking very nervous as Moody stood scowling in front of him, magical eye quivering in its socket as it stared at Bill. After a very long pause during which everyone considered placing shield charms around themselves just in case Moody started firing off curses, his features relaxed slightly and Bill breathed a visible sigh of relief.

"Well, I suppose I might be able to teach you a thing or two, so long as you pay perfect attention to what I'm saying."

Bill nodded vigorously and Moody seemed to contemplate something very hard before waving his wand in the direction of the old wizard wireless sat atop the kitchen table. It jumped into life with a crackle and then the room was filled with the sound of some rather old fashioned swing music. Tonks and Sirius rolled their eyes, but Remus looked rather impressed at Moody's taste and Tonks couldn't help laughing as he began tapping his foot in time with music.

"Right then lad, right foot first, no, other right," Moody barked and Bill jumped as he received a sharp tap on the head with Moody's wand and his legs began doing a jig of their own accord.

"That's it, turn to the left, LEFT!" Moody roared as Bill attempted to fight against his self dancing legs and wavered dangerously, very nearly toppling over. He found himself spinning on the spot and lurching towards Moody who grabbed his arms and held him steady.

"Follow me. Right, left, right, and turn . . ."

Bill winced as Moody's wooden leg connected sharply with his shin and then yelped when he stood on Moody's other foot and in retaliation Moody deliberately trod on Bill's foot.

Sirius was doubled up with laughter as Bill was swung this way and that around the kitchen trying desperately to keep his balance and stop his legs from getting tangled up, to little avail. After a good five minutes he found himself falling over backwards and sitting on the kitchen floor looking up at Moody who was berating him for his utter lack of gracefulness.

"I've seen trolls with more talent for dancing than you!" Moody grumbled as Bill scrambled to his feet, rubbing his sore behind and shuffling away from Moody quickly and into a seat.

"Right, thanks, I'll bear that in mind then," Bill said sarcastically.

When Tonks had gained control of her laughter and Moody was suitably calm enough to sit himself down at the kitchen table and delve into the now rather tatty looking Daily Prophet, Remus gave her a pointed look and she rolled her eyes, knowing that the time had come for her to attempt her penultimate task.

"Moody?" she said, careful not to let anything of her sudden apprehension show through in her voice as she considered just how painful in comparison to morphing turning into a ferret might well be.

Moody did not look up from the paper but gave a grunt to show he had heard and Tonks decided to just get it over with and hope that a good bottle of fire whiskey would be at hand to ease any bruises, or better yet, Remus to help with kissing things better.

Shaking her head to clear the thoughts that had suddenly entered it and suitably distracted her, Tonks ploughed on with the story she had concocted to explain her very odd request.

"I've got this assignment from the ministry, they wanted me to infiltrate a gang of criminals who've been making counterfeit paintings to help them with stealing the originals, you know, using them as look out. Anyway, I need to get some practice at painting, to err, try and understand how these people think, that was what Scrimgrouer suggested anyway -"

"Just hex them," Moody said gruffly, neither eye having left the paper he was scanning.  
"Well I would, but this is Scrimgrouer we're talking about and he wants to see some proof that I've actually been practicing. So, I was wondering if you'd mind sitting for me whilst I painted a portrait of you."

Now Moody lowered his paper, staring at her with a piercing gaze, magical eye sweeping up and down over her and making Tonks feel faintly queasy. However she remained silent and smiled in what she hoped was a relaxed and faintly hopeful fashion.

"Why don't you paint Remus?" Moody asked eventually, glancing over at Lupin who was calmly sipping at his coffee and following the exchange with interest. "As you seem to be so fascinated by him."

"Because as of yet, Scrimgrouer has no idea that Remus and I know each other and it might raise questions if I turn up with a painting of a werewolf and a known friend of Sirius Black," Tonks said bluntly and Moody actually looked faintly impressed with her reasoning, though a little irritated that this hadn't gotten him off the hook.

"Well, Kingsley then," Moody suggested, looking back down at his paper as if he had just solved the problem.

"Kingsley isn't around, you are," Tonks countered and then, putting on her best innocent grin added, "plus, you have a very, erm, _interesting _face."

Remus sniggered into his coffee, though managed to hide it well. Bill and Sirius on the other hand burst out laughing and Moody shot daggers at them with his non magical eye which immediately made them shut up and look nervous.

"_Interesting?"_ Moody said very slowly, staring at Tonks as she nodded vigorously. "I see. Well, what would this involve?"

"Not a lot, you'd just have to sit for me for a little bit whilst I painted," Tonks replied.

Moody considered this for a very long time, giving Tonks a mistrustful look as he remembered all the strange things that had been going on recently. However when he did finally answer it was a grudging yes.

"Excellent, well we'll get started straight away then shall we?" Tonks suggested, jumping up from her seat and rummaging around in the drawers for brushes. She summoned an old paint set from the library along with a rather dusty easel and set everything up in the kitchen. Once this was done she stood in front of the blank piece of paper and studied Moody over the top of it; he was looking irritated already.

"Remus, a word," Tonks said, nodding towards the kitchen door. Remus raised his eyebrows in question as he stood from his seat and followed her out, Tonks closing the door so the others wouldn't hear any conversation.

"I'm a useless painter, how am I supposed to make this look anything like Moody, and how on earth am I going to get akway with doing this?" she asked. Remus looked thoughtful for a moment, considering the other paintings in the hallway as if they might have a suggestion.

"Try a photographic charm, it'll make Alistor's image appear upon the paper," he said and Tonks nodded.

"Ok, but what about the woman's body, and before you say it, I am not using my own, that's just too strange."

Remus chuckled lightly.  
"I wouldn't dream of suggesting it, Nymphadora," he said, then gestured to the closed curtains that covered the evil, shrieking image of Sirius' mother. "However, I'm sure a suitable substitute can be found."

Tonks' eyebrows shot upwards and she gaped at Remus who was grinning slightly and ducked his head in a very marauder like fashion.

"Are you suggesting what I think you are, Remus Lupin?" Tonks asked in disbelief and he shrugged.

"Possibly."

"He will never forgive me," Tonks said, but grinned all the same. She pushed open the kitchen door and stepped back in, Remus following, and took up her place behind the easel again.

"Come on, I don't have all day," Moody said and Tonks began muttering the photographic charm, adding Moody's name into it and soon an image of his head began to appear on the page, black and white and slightly blurred at first, before becoming sharper, and then the colours appeared vividly. Then, with a final glance at Remus who smiled at her from the table where he was seated besides an avidly waiting Sirius, Tonks muttered the charm again, this time adding Mrs. Black's name into it.

All the while she waited for the charms to finish their work, Tonks made a great show of running the paintbrush over the paper and mixing colours, although of course she was not actually doing any painting herself, but she needed to keep Moody in the dark long enough for the image to assemble itself. When it was finally done, Tonks studied it with a kind of fascinated horror.

"Well?" Moody asked, noticing the sudden lack of activity on Tonks' part. "Is it done then?"

Tonks stood mute for a moment as she looked at the monstrosity that she had created. Sirius and Bill instantly sprang up from their seats to come and gawp at the painting, and indeed, their jaws did drop when they looked at it.

"I . . . what . . . arrrrrrrg!" Sirius said, mouth opening and closing, eyes wider than that of a house elf.

"I can't believe it," Bill said as Remus strolled over to take a look as well. "I can't believe it, I can't -"

"Alright, alright, it can't be all that bad!" Moody grumbled as he stood up, wooden leg clunking loudly on the flagstones and made his way around to the portrait. The air seemed to chill very suddenly as he set eyes on the painting and Tonks found herself ducking behind Remus, putting him between her and Moody.

Moody simply stared at the portrait in silence for a very long while, taking in the extremely worrying image of his head atop the old and evil body of Mrs Black. He stared and he stared and Tonks thought he must be considering the best curse to use upon her.

Then, very suddenly, Mad-Eye began to laugh.

Tonks, Sirius, Bill and Remus gaped at each other in disbelief. Were they actually hearing this or not?

But Moody's shoulders were shaking and he was roaring with laughter as he stared at Tonks' creation. Tonks, who was even more worried by this sudden out of character behaviour clutched at the back of Remus' robes and Sirius backed up a few paces.

"Very good Tonks, very good indeed!" Moody said as his laughter subsided, and then still chuckling to himself, he strode from the room, leaving the four of them to try to get their heads around what they had just seen.

"Where's the bottle of fire whiskey?" Sirius asked eventually, heading for the cupboards and summoning four very large glasses to fill.

It took quite some time for the four of them to get over Moody's unbelievably weird behaviour and they had gone over all sorts of theories trying to explain why he had not done as everyone had expected and simply blasted the painting to oblivion and turned Tonks into a particularly colourful ferret. Sirius had even gone so far as to suggest Moody had been drinking until Tonks pointed out that this would definitely be against his policy of constant vigilance.

Finding no suitable answer to the mystery, they had given up thinking about it and Tonks had gone back to worrying about her other task and who exactly she was intending to involve in it. She was definitely running out of options and people not in the know about the tournament were beginning to ask questions about the mistletoe that had suddenly sprung up around the house.

"Who on earth has been putting this stuff up?" Kingsley asked at lunchtime as he strode into the kitchen where Molly was cooking stew and jabbed a thumb at the mistletoe attached to the doorframe above him.

"For decorative purposes?" Tonks suggested meekly and Kingsley grinned at her, taking a seat at the table.

"More likely an excuse to snog Remus."

Tonks felt herself going red and glanced over at Remus who was reclining in the seat next to her and filling out the crossword, his feet resting on her chair. He looked up at Kingsley and gave the smirking man a good natured smile.

"Tonks has no need for excuses," he replied casually before returning his gaze to the paper and quickly filling out another column. Tonks grinned at him gratefully and he glanced up, momentarily catching her eye and returning the smile.

Kingsley continued smirking at Tonks, enjoying teasing his young colleague.

"Alright then, nice to know you two have finally got together, but that still doesn't explain the mistletoe everywhere a good few months out of season."

"Oh I don't know, I just felt like it," Tonks said, thinking that this was probably the worst explanation ever. However, considering he was talking to the young witch who liked to sport pink hair and routinely change her nose into the shape of various animals', Kingsley actually seemed to think this an acceptable answer.

Tonks lapsed back into musing over suitable candidates. The idea she had fixed in her mind was that they needed to be two people with whom she could pass it off as being a completely innocent kiss, nothing that could possibly be misinterpreted by anyone. Which was why she had already ruled Bill out. Molly was sure to start making awkward comments and Tonks had given Remus the wrong idea about her and Bill once before already, although she doubted that he could possibly is worried now after everything that had happened since her veritaserum fuelled admission.

Tonks sighed irritably and shuffled in her seat absentmindedly as she considered her choices. Her fidgeting caused Remus to look up distractedly from his crossword with an inquiring expression and she nodded her head slightly towards the mistletoe to indicate her dilemma. Remus merely adopted a mild smile and shrugged slightly, indicating that he had little help to offer. Tonks sighed heavily again and thought that it would probably have been quite odd if he was jumping to her rescue with answers anyway and went back to thinking and watching Molly chopping vegetables for her stew whilst she waited for Arthur to come back from work at the ministry on his lunch break.

When Arthur did in fact appear some ten minutes later, he was not alone and Tonks leapt up from her seat and rushed to the doorway with a grin to great the new arrival.

Charlie Weasley laughed as Tonks pulled him into a bear hug and gave him a (very hasty) kiss.  
"Wow Charlie, haven't seen you in ages!" Tonks said as she let go of the grinning, red headed young man and walked with him back to the kitchen table where Molly was now serving up lunch and chatting with Arthur. Tonks sat beside Remus, who nudged her leg with his sock covered toe as she sat down and gave her a smirk over his paper. She returned the expression and held up three fingers on her hand, letting one drop to indicate that was one kiss off her list. Remus rolled his eyes and returned to the crossword.

"I've been in Romania with the dragons," Charlie explained. "Dumbledore's a little concerned that the death eaters will be looking to swell the ranks with a few of the horntails we've been keeping an eye on out there, and you can imagine how dangerous a dragon in their control would be."

Tonks nodded agreement and noticed Molly shudder slightly at the thought of fire breathing beasts descending upon them all. But Charlie gave her a hearty hug and soon she was pestering him with a range of questions from, was he keeping safe with all those dragons around too how many times a week was he washing his hair? Charlie took her grilling in his practiced stride and Molly did not seem to think it odd in the slightest that Tonks had greeted an old school friend in such an exuberant fashion.

After lunch, Tonks and Remus headed to the library to do some research for the Order and Sirius wandered off upstairs to amuse himself with the Snape's face dart board. The others had returned to work and Molly was busy giving Charlie a tour of the house. Sirius had started off helping out with this, but his sarcastic comments had eventually got on Mrs Weasley's nerves so much that she had sent him away with a few choice words of her own. The afternoon passed quietly and in fact, Tonks became so absorbed with her research and chatting away to Remus that she all but forgot about her final task. And so, when evening rolled around and Order members started arriving for the meal, she somewhat panicked as she realised it was now or never.

She followed Remus from the library and towards the kitchen, Sirius joining them in the hallway and giving her a very significant look as the front door opened and three more Order members appeared. They were Hestia Jones, Emmeline Vance and Dedalus Diggle.

"Right, here's the deal you two," she said, grabbing both Sirius and Remus and hurriedly explaining a plan to them to try to explain away to the others the ridiculously embarrassing thing she was going to have to do next. Sirius was struggling not to burst out laughing at the look of horror on Tonks face as she watched Dedalus and the others approach the mistletoe that had been strategically hung from the chandelier in the centre of the ceiling in the hallway where they all stood.

"The things I do for your amusement cousin," Tonks said to Sirius, grimacing as she strode forward, fixing a toothy grin on her face as she approached the three older Order members and grabbed them all, pulling them into a massive hug.

"Wow you guys! I'm so glad you're here!" she said in her most enthusiastic, over the top happy voice, and planted a kiss on Dedalus who looked both extremely surprised and extremely confused, as did Hestia and Emmeline when Tonks finally released the three of them.

"What the -" Dedalus began, until Sirius and Remus hurried over, Remus placing an arm around Tonks and smiling at the very confused people in front of him.

"Not to worry, Tonks was attacked by a particularly interesting piece of Black furniture earlier whilst we were cleaning out the attic."

"It's having adverse affects on her," Sirius added, "we think it might have been cursed, but Moody assures us its nothing that bad, should wear off soon."

"Until then I'm afraid Tonks will be a little over friendly," Remus finished, glancing down at Tonks who was beaming at everyone still.

"I see," Emmeline said, eyeing Tonks warily and giving her a wide berth as she continued on her way to the kitchen, muttering to Hestia who was shaking her head and Dedalus who was still looking slightly shocked. As soon as they were gone, Tonks let the grin drop from her face.

"I don't know which one of them it was, but they were wearing Gilderoy Lockhart branded perfume and it was awful!" she said, feeling Remus' body shake slightly as he chuckled, arm still around her. "You two were good with the story though," she added.

"Of course, it's all those years of having to cover for ourselves when McGonagall or another teacher caught us up to no good," Sirius said quickly. Then the mock look of modesty upon his face was replaced by a wide grin. "So Tonks, one kiss left, then the tournament's over and we can add up the scores."

She rolled her eyes and gave Sirius a thump on the arm.

"Right, right, I hadn't forgotten."

"Neither had I," Remus muttered, glancing pointedly at the still grinning Sirius.

"That was your cue to hop it, Sirius," Tonks added and Sirius gave a barking laugh before turning on his heel and heading for the kitchen door from behind which the inviting smell of supper was coming, accompanied by loud, friendly chatter.

"Alright then, thirty points in your column it is," he said with a final grin to the two of them as he opened the kitchen door and disappeared inside.

"Well, this has been a very long and decidedly odd day," Remus said, letting his hands rest against Tonks' back, holding her a little closer to him. Despite his words he was smiling cheerfully at her and Tonks grinned back.

"What else do you expect when staying in this house?" she asked and Remus' smile grew.

"A very good point indeed, dear Nymphadora." He paused in order to push a strand of hair, (electric blue now, though it had started out pink this morning), behind her ear. "So, I have one very important question to ask you. Do I get my kiss under the mistletoe now?"

"You dope," Tonks said, laughing as she rose up on her toes, "you don't need to wait for mistletoe."

Tonks was still smiling when she kissed him and Remus could feel the curve of her mouth as their lips met and she pressed closer against him, wrapping her arms around his neck. When they drew back eventually the grin seemed to have spread even further and she almost looked on the verge of laughter.

"Does something about my kissing style amuse you, Nymphadora?" Remus asked with mock seriousness, and she sniggered, allowing her arms to drop from around his neck. They began to walk at a leisurely pace towards the kitchen whilst she answered him.

"Of course not," she replied, "just this whole thing is quite funny really, the fact that it took these entire ridiculous, embarrassing tasks and the complete lack of maturity of me and Sirius to actually get you and I together. I'd have thought it would have put you off."

Remus chuckled as he held the door open for her and they stepped into the warmth of the kitchen.

"You're forgetting the marauder in me," he said, grinning at her as Sirius whistled at them when they entered the room. Tonks couldn't help but laugh despite fighting the urge to roll her eyes at him.

"So, we have all completed to the best of our abilities the tasks set. There have been a number of spectacular failures, an even larger number of bruises -"

"Ha!" Mundungus said sarcastically, interrupting Sirius' little speech. He along with Bill and Tonks was sat in the library watching Sirius stride up and down, the parchment with the scores written upon it clutched in his hand.

"Some highly embarrassing moments," Sirius continued, ignoring the interruption, "a lot of laughs and a few kisses I'm sure."

He grinned at Tonks who threw a cushion at him but smiled all the same.

"And now," Sirius said in a dramatic voice as he opened up the parchment with a flourish, "it is time to announce the winner of the Grimmauld place games. In last place, with a measly two hundred and thirty two points, is Mundungus Fletcher. 'Dung, for being such a complete loser, you win the booby prise."

Sirius waved his wand and a bucket leapt up from behind the sofa and pelted towards Mundungus. It tipped upside down over his head and just as Bill and Tonks leapt up, doused him in sewage slug slime. Mundungus screamed and began hopping around the room as he jabbed at parts of his cloak with his wand, yelling cleaning spells. The others laughed appreciatively as Sirius continued reading the final scores.

"In third place, is Mr. Bill Weasley" Sirius said, noting her glare and grinning mischievously. "Bill, you managed to rack up three hundred and thirty seven points and as such win a bar of honey dukes best!"

Bill rolled his eyes as he caught the large bar that Sirius drew from his pocket and threw in his direction.

"In second place, on an impressive, but not quite good enough three hundred and sixty points we have, my cousin Nymphado- sorry Tonks" Sirius yelled. "For coming second, Tonks here wins this lovely bottle of wine my parents have been letting mature in the cellar. Drink it in the knowledge that they'd probably kill me if they knew I was handing their best stuff out to blood traitors and please toast to the winner. The wonderful, the handsome, the impeccably well dressed -"

"Get on with it!" Mundungus yelled, which earned him another bucket full of slime over the head.

"The magnificent, Mr. Sirius Black with four hundred and two points! Mr. Sirius Black wins the bottle of fire whiskey he's been keeping specially and the right to not have it stolen off him even when you lot decide you'd quite like a night cap as well. I also win your undying respect and the title of Marauder extraordinaire!"

Tonks broke out into peels of laughter as with an impressive and complicated bit of transfiguration, Sirius turned his clothes into a royal cape and perched a crown atop his head. She and Bill clapped as the winner of the Grimmauld place games bowed low and then straightened up grinning at them all.

After all the ridiculous things Tonks had endured, all the horribly embarrassing moments, she felt that every second was worth it to have made Sirius this cheerful again and his time in Grimmauld place that little bit easier to bear. The fact that she now had Remus to kiss her and her tell her that he loved her didn't hurt either, she thought, grinning as Sirius bowed low once more, the cheeky, marauder grin plastered to his face.

A/N: Ok folks this is the last chapter! Hope you all enjoyed. In case you couldn't read the final scores here they are.

1st: Sirius with 402 points

2nd: Tonks with 360 points

3rd: Bill with 337 points

Last: Mundungus with 232 points


End file.
